Vagina in a Cup is not like D*** in a Box. It’s not a parody. In fact, it’s quite serious - if you consider sticking your dong in a cup a serious matter.

Produced by Tenga, a Japanese company (obviously), Vagina in a Cup is, well…I better let the fine folks at Tenga explain what it does:

“A deep ’sucking’ sensation made possible by a special structure. Special valves create a virtual vacuum inside the cup, to deliver an amazing sucking sensation. And, the unique pinched-in shape helps to achieve an unparalleled tightness. These advanced features combine with an arousing ’slurping’ sound and vibration to give you the feeling that you’re enjoying a real deep throat experience.”

These sex products get me so angry sometimes - not because of what they promise, but for my pride being too high to take the plunge and try them out.

I’m a wuss, plain and simple.

C’mon, let’s get serious: you would try it. Yes, you. I don’t care if you’re sexually satisfied - it’s intriguing. I’m not going to feel ashamed for being intrigued, and neither should you.

You’re afraid that Vagina in a Cup may be better than sex, aren’t you? Me too. It could be…who knows? Have you tried it? No, seriously - have you?

Somebody out there please place your member in the onanicup, do your duty and report back to me as soon as possible. Even if you regret it, I won’t regret you telling me all about it.