I need to say this. Jewelry sucks. And I hate buying it for women and I think I’m done buying it forever–at least until I decide to get engaged. Honestly, is there a more useless thing on this planet then jewelry?
Completely ignoring the entire system of imbalance that permeates men/women romantic relationships when it comes to gift-giving and b… Click to read more

Thanks to the guy that gave us duck-like celebrity lips (I’m looking at you, Jenna Jameson), the g-spot can now be enlarged using a collagen injection known as the ‘G-shot’, making the elusive ‘button’ more sensitive and easier to find. Glad they figured this out, because before hearing about it, I was working on a very intr… Click to read more

Sure Maxim’s annual Hot 100 list is fun for a quick flip-through in the sh*tter, but it a lacks a certain something…Oh yeah, hardcore nudity!
Well, luckily for us all, the good people at Genesis have published their Porn’s Hot 100 XXX Star “It” List. Genesis picked the order based on “the opinion of our staff and some se… Click to read more

Between bra stuffing for girls and crotch stuffing for guys lies the worst tool for false marketing: girdles.
I understand the need to tuck your flab away, people – but when did, uh, eating less and exercising become such an arduous task, or at least one that’s put by the wayside for a girdle?
My point of all this nonsense is this. Scary, huh? Horrif… Click to read more

The Morning Show‘s Mike and Juliet totally have their fingers on the pulse of young America as evidenced by their latest buzzworthy topic, “Drunkorexia.”
Drunkorexia (also known as “drunk-arexia”; take your pick) is the name of a media-approved epidemic that describes the daily behavior of every well-adjusted girl in… Click to read more

The following article satire is brought to you by the folks at COED:

I often find myself asking myself (is that a run on?) “where is the perfect location for meeting girls?”
Sure, clubs are often the first place that comes to mind, but my cute pick-up lines don’t always work well when attempting to talk over loud, fist-pumping music to orang… Click to read more

This weekend The Times published an article about the “bimbo delusion,” which is the act of men stereotyping blonde-haired women.
According to studies done by Thierry Meyer, a professor of social psychology at the University of Paris, men subconsciously drop their IQ level upon contact with a blonde.
Men dumb themselves down for blondes exc… Click to read more

You know what stinks? Ladies who put fashionable trends before protection.
Remember the old days when your mom would push you and your father out the door for a few hours to host a “Tupperware party”? Yeah, that was kind of lame – but at least it wasn’t even half as lame as hosting a “Taser party,” the new trend all the ladi… Click to read more

I consider myself a classy guy – opening doors for people, walking the not-so-able elderly across the street and occasionally giving food (or money) to the homeless. More importantly, I always make sure to keep constant with one thing when it comes to being charitable: equality.
If somebody needs assistance in any way, shape or form within reason I wi… Click to read more

You know what’s so weird, yet so understandable? If a women gets caught masturbating with some wacky device most guys would say, “niiiiiice” and be turned on. Now, if a girl walked in on a sweaty dude huffing and puffing away, plugging some doll…well, it’s not exactly a turn-on, is it?
But wait, sex-starved fellas! Your time… Click to read more

I’m all about the truth – truth in relationships, truth in politics, truth in what a girl is hiding underneath her undergarments. The act of stuffing should be exclusive to Santa Claus and Thanksgiving.
The Wonderbra was designed to make women feel better about their lack of rack by padding around their mini-rounds. How is that any better than m… Click to read more

Ladies be warned: you can’t change a player’s game in the 9th inning. (NY Post)
When violators of driving laws are stopped, Illinois will take their toll. (Chicago Sun-Times)
A Headmaster in the U.K. school system says children should have “a daily dose of fear.” When reached for comment, Severus Snape didn’t return calls… Click to read more

Featherbeds, futons, laundry bags, white boards – you don’t need any of them.
They don’t matter; they’re inconsequential in you enjoying time away from your ‘rents house and avoiding embarrassing, CollegeHumor-worthy moments. A spiffy laundry bag from your mom isn’t going to help you through college, let alone… Click to read more

Britney Spears VMA comeback will include hordes of dancers zipping around in harnesses mid-air and a “Disappearing Act” through a set of mirrors courtesy of magician Criss Angel. It’s great to see Spears back in music. (NY Daily News)
Two bozos busted by cops over sketchy marijuana broccoli exchange. Apparently, oregano was out of sto… Click to read more