Toasts are like those speeches right before a climactic scene in a movie – they could make or break the experience. While many err on the long-winded side, we at COED are all about the short and sweet. So, we’re pretty pumped about this new 3 Word Toast giveaway that promotes Bacardi Oakheart spiced rum. Why? ‘Cuz you get a kick-ass Bacardi Oakheart-branded stein*. Need help? Maybe these toasts will jar something loose. Check ‘em out after the jump.

New Year’s Eve is the perfect night for getting waaaaaaaaaaaaaaasted. New Year’s Day? Not so much. After running to the bathroom to puke a twice and promising God that you will never drink again if he lets you make it through this pain, you return to your bed and contemplate just what will make this horrible feeling end. Unfortunately, you are fresh out of Vicodin.

Lucky for you, there are other ways to get rid of the spins/headache/dry mouth/sore muscles/anything else that comes along with a hangover (besides the smoky smell in your hair and ugly dude lying next to you).

Hear that? Off in the distance? That’s time ticking, and church bells ringing. There’s a pretty decent chance that you’re on the path to marriage. Many guys meekly give in to the inevitable, letting the lady do as she wishes. Sure, gotta give them credit, they often do beautiful jobs. But they rarely reflect the guy. No more. Here’s a guide to the ultimate Dude wedding, to help make this ridiculous experience just a little bit awesome.

Buying someone a drink is five times better than a handshake.
A flask engraved with a personal message is one of the best gifts you can ever give. And make sure there’s something in it.
The bar clock moves twice as fast from midnight to last call.
If you’re going to drink on the job, drink vodka. It’s the no-tell liquor.
Asking a bartender what… Click to read more