Obnoxiously bright blues, greens and various shades of pink are walking, talking and dancing all around me. For some reason the intensely colored, and revealing dresses are the focus of my attention initially, not the girls wearing them. I can’t help but think this was a bad idea.

I’m nervous. This isn’t an excited, happy nervous; it’s an anxious, uncomfortable nervous. I’ve never been to a strip club before. I agreed to come here because I’m in New York City for the first time, my friends wanted to go, and it seems like the perfect time to try something new. Maybe I don’t like new.

Some of the girls are sitting and talking to customers, some are hanging around the edges of the club in small groups, and one girl is dancing on stage, slowly removing her clothes. I’m supposed to watch her, to be turned on, to want her. I don’t. I feel like a voyeur; averting my eyes from the stage like it’s something private meant for someone else. (more…)

Man finds $100K in attic, ends up fighting cops, widow, demon inside him that says “f*** it all, move to Fiji and marry a hot Sweden chick.” (Sun Sentinel)

Damn! Teachers really are horny these days – do any of them have the decency to keep their cream-colored pantsuits from TJ Maxx on? (MSN News)

Baby’s first sleepover: a day care in Canada, like, totally forgot that a 3-year-old was inside, so they locked her in overnight. (Edmonton Sun)

When the Big Cheese teaches the Little Cheese, it’s turns out rotten. (Gawker)

“11 Things to Do When You’re in Traffic Gridlock” (SF Gate)

Jones Soda presents: Dirt and Sweat Soda. Seriously. (BusinessWeek)

Sooooo you thought the “Call On Me” workout music video was sexy? I did too but this little ditty by Benny Benassi blows it outta the water.

Not only are these power-tool-wielding bikini babes screwing, nailing, drilling and griding but they’re glistening in sweat and bouncing all over the place – in the best way possible.

Watch it and thank me later…

Check out the action after the jump! (more…)