In this day and age of just about every adequate baseball player in the world being outed as horrible, sinful steroid users, you can’t go to a game without wondering if the player you’re rooting for is enhancing his performance with something a bit more powerful than Viagra. Luckily, there’s a whole slew of ballplayers who leave no doubt as to whether or not they’ve ever taken steroids; odds are they never lifted a weight in their lives either. With that in mind, here are seven steroid-free players who are totally cool with just not being that good. (more…)

Brock beat up Frank Mir something pretty bad.

He THEN proceeded to: threaten ring security, flip off the crowd, curse and scream at his defeated opponent, and yell “F@$k you in the ass” to Frank Mir’s family. Even in the interview, as he received loud boos for being EVERYTHING that the MMA sport has worked to prevent, we kept saying that he loved the boos.

Hey Brock, you are not in the WWE anymore. You are not fighting Papa Shongo. You, in one night, set the MMA world back 10 years. Brock is everything that no one wanted to see in MMA, a big burly white trash over-steroided douchebag who has no respect for the discipline and sport of martial arts.

Go home Brock. Bang your 50 year old-looking wanna-be stripper wife, and go back to WWE. You are going to ruin a sport that has worked too hard to get where it is. Even Kimbo had better ring generalship and respect for the sport.

Please go ride your Harley without a helmet. I never thought I would say this, but hopefully Kimbo gets through TUF and brings some class back to the heavy weights.

UPDATE:

By now, everyone has had time to cool off, yours truly included. It is important to note several things. Brock has apologized, though half-hearted and a little more of a business apology than a personal one. We also received a phone call claiming potential defamation from Brock Lesnar’s people. Charming.

The facts are plain and simple. Before every fight, the participants are asked inflammatory interview questions. It is designed to inspire the casual MMA fan to fork over $44 USD for the PPV broadcast. No fight, could have POSSIBLY had badder blood than more smack than the last Tito Ortiz/Ken Shamrock fight. Hands down, no arguments. At the end of that fight, after some mild showmanship from Tito – nothing campared to Brock’s hissy fit, Tito and Ken hugged and spoke well of each other. Whatever drama the Lesnar camp is referring to, when they speak of Frank Mir’s comments, can only shadow in comparison in the aforementioned press sh*t-show. Frank Mir made comments and Brock Lesnar made comments. Brock won by face-smashing. The other facts are that Brock would note touch gloves at the beginning of the fight – ok I guess. At the end of the fight, Brock: flipped off the crowd, violated sponsorship agreements, got in Mir’s bloody face and yelled at his family. These are facts.

To flip off a crowd that paid money to see you fight and to get in your downed opponent’s face – is unsportsmanlike and classless.

To act like a spoiled child (though a 300lb child) and stomp around the ring because you “aren’t getting the respect you deserve” – makes you a punk.

Respect is earned. Yes Brock Lesnar, you hold the title. You have also fought under 10 fights. At 10 fights, you can make the respect argument. In the meantime, wave to the crowd, please the sponsors, shake hands and kiss Dana White’s ass for handing you the UFC Heavyweight title. You have defended well so far, but wait for 10 fights and respect will come.

Oh yeah, threats for calling you a classless punk when it is justified…not a good start.

With the Alex Rodriguezs, Ken Griffey Jrs, and Manny Ramirezs of the league getting up in age, it is now time for COED to preview the top five future superstar hitters that are still 25 years old or younger. These are the guys sure to make headlines for years to come. Now, if we can just keep them off the juice…

(Note: any player who turns 26 before the 2009 All Star Break will not be included in this list. Sorry Mets fans!) (more…)

On Wednesday, Los Angeles Dodgers’ star Manny Ramirez was notified of a 50 game suspension after testing positive for a banned substance. With that in mind, COED takes a look at the best performance-enhanced players at each position in baseball history (well…that we know of at least).

1B: Rafael Palmeiro: While playing from 1986-2005, Palmeiro became only the fourth player ever to reach both the career 500 home run and 3,000 hit plateaus. Palmeiro also accounted for 1.835 RBIs—over 400 more than fellow disgraced first baseman Mark McGwire. After former teammate Jose Canseco identified Palmeiro as a steroid user in his 2005 book Juiced, Palmeiro testified before congress that he had “never used steroids, period.” Nearly five months later, Palmeiro was suspended by MLB for ten days after testing positive for stanozolol.

2B: Brian Roberts: In nine seasons, the Orioles’ leadoff hitter has a career batting average of .284, including two All-Star Game appearances. But after being named in the 2006 Mitchell Report, Roberts came clean when he stated he took “one shot of steroids” back in 2003.

3B: Alex Rodriguez: Twelve-time All-Star. Three-time AL MVP. The youngest player ever to hit 500 career home runs. But this last year has brought troubled times for A-Rod. His marriage to his wife Cynthia ended in divorce. Torn cartilage in hip required surgery this offseason. And then he admitted to ESPN’s Peter Gammons that he took banned substances from 2001-2003. Even more embarrassing for Rodriguez –he allegedly had an affair with this actress from “Swept Away”.

SS. Miguel Tejada: The 2002 AL MVP certainly does not have a problem at the plate while amassing over 1100 RBIs—including 150 in the 2004 season. Tejada (if that’s really his last name) does have a problem with telling the truth. This February, Tejada pleaded guilty to charges that he lied to Congress in 2005 about his connections to Palmeiro and steroids. And just last year, ESPN obtained Tejada’s birth certificate that showed he was two years older than he claimed to be on his MLB contract, and that his surname is spelled Tejeda, rather than “Tejada.”

LF: Barry Bonds: Unlike fellow left fielder Manny Ramirez, Bonds never was punished by baseball for his alleged use of performance-enhancing drugs. The all-time MLB leader in home runs (762) and MVP awards (six) brought “the clear” and “the cream” into our vernacular, stating that he received the substance from his personal trainer for treatment of “arthritis”. Yeah, and my friends all smoke pot to um…treat their glaucoma.

RF: Gary Sheffield: The nephew of Dwight Gooden, Sheff, now a member of the New York Mets, has played on nine All-Star teams, and hit his 500thcareer home run this April. Like many on our list, Sheffield was named in the infamous Mitchell Report, and admitted to using “the cream” while working out with Barry Bonds in 2001.

CF: Gary Matthews, Jr: Like Bonds, Matthews, Jr. throughout his career has been an excellent outfielder, often robbing opponents of home runs while patrolling center. But in 2007, Matthews, Jr. was connected to an investigation of a steroid ring, in which evidence showed he purchased testosterone and steroids. While Matthews, Jr. denied using PEDs, he did admit to occasionally using crack cocaine. Professional sports: the only job you can admit to using crack and still get paid. Well, that and mayor of D.C.

DH: Jason Giambi: A five-time All-Star with 397 career home runs, Giambi has had a most successful run in the majors between his time in Oakland and in the Bronx, albeit performance enhanced. Jason and his brother Jeremy were included in the Mitchell Report, and both admitted their wrongdoings, with Jason stating “I was wrong for doing that stuff.”

C: Ivan Rodriguez: Pudge has denied using PEDs, but according to Jose Canseco’s book, Rodriguez was a beneficiary of Canseco’s habitual acquisitions of steroids, along with former teammates Rafael Palmeiro and Juan Gonzalez. The 13-time gold-glove winning catcher topped out at 35 home runs in 1999, but his rocket arm always kept runners weary on the basepaths. So with Pudge, Raffe, Juan Gone, A-Rod, and Ken Caminiti ‘roiding it up, the 2001 Texas locker room was akin to the Ozzy Osbourne/Mötley Crüe 1984 Tour bus, except none of the Rangers faced positve tests for snorting ants.

SP: Roger Clemens: A member of both the 300 career wins and 4,000 career strikeout clubs, Clemens was always known for his freakish workout routines, which perhaps were aided by the use of steroids. His name was mentioned 82 times in the Mitchell Report where he was accused of using anabolic steroids, an allegation he has repeatedly denied. For a guy who made a cameo in “Anger Management”, Clemens sure does have some anger issues. He was once called a “headhunter” by Lou Pinella for his tendencies to brush back batters. And during the 2000 World Series, well, this happened (2:27). In a totally unrelated matter, increased aggressiveness is often claimed to occur with anabolic steroid use.

Los Angeles Dodgers outfielder, Manny Ramirez was just busted for failing a performance-enhancing drug test. As a result, Man-Ram received a 50 game suspension effective immediately. Aside from totally screwing over the Dodgers, Manny’s absence will cost him roughly $7.7 million. So just to rub in the sheer stupidity of his actions, we’ve decided to throw together a list of 50 way better ways he could have blown that cash, other than losing it to the MLB. (more…)

Rickey Henderson and Jim Rice were recently elected into the baseball Hall of Fame. But for the third year in a row Mark McGwire failed to gain entry into Cooperstown.

The Hall has a way of snubbing some of it’s greatest players, just look at Bert Blyleven who sits at #5 on the career strikeout list for pitchers with 3,701, but has yet to get elected after 11 years of eligibility.

Most would argue that McGwire and his 583 home runs make him worthy of induction, but it seems that the looming steroid cloud will keep him out.

McGwire is the first in a long list of steroid era players that are, or will soon be, eligible for induction. So who do you think deserves to get in?

Take a look at the list, analyze the stats, make a moral decisions and vote.

Barry Bonds

Year Eligible: 2012
Career Stats: Batting average: .298; Home runs: 762; RBI: 1,996; Hits: 2,935; Stolen bases: 514; On-base percentage: .444
Career Highlights and Awards: 7X League MVP, 11X Silver Slugger, 15X All-Star, Home Run King, Most Home Runs in a single season, and lone member of 500-500 club.

Rafael Palmeiro

Year Eligible: 2010
Career Stats: Batting average: .288; Home runs: 569; RBI: 1,835; Hits: 3,020;
Career Highlights and Awards: 4X All-Star, 2X Silver Slugger, 4th member of 500 Home Run – 3,000 Hit club

Roger Clemens

Year Eligible: 2012
Career Stats: Win-Loss record: 354-184; ERA: 3.12; Strikeouts: 4,672
Career Highlights and Awards: 11x All-Star, 7x Cy Young Award winner, 1986 AL MVP, 2X 20 Strike-out Games

Gary Sheffield

Year Eligible: Still Active
Career Stats: Batting average: .292; Home runs: 499; RBI: 1,633; Hits: 2,615; Stolen bases: 1,592; On-base percentage: .444
Career Highlights and Awards: 9-time All-Star, 4-time Silver Slugger Award.

Mark McGwire

Year Eligible: 2006
Career Stats: Batting average: .263; Home runs: 583; RBI: 1,414
Career Highlights and Awards: 12x All-Star, 3x Silver Slugger Award, 1987 Rookie of the Year, Highest at bats per home run ratio, single-season home run record for rookies, 70 home runs in one season,

Sammy Sosa

Year Eligible: Still active
Career Stats: Batting average: .273; Home runs: 609; RBI: 1,667
Career Highlights and Awards: 7x All-Star, 6x Silver Slugger Award, 1998 NL MVP,

Dear TLC,

I realize you’re attached to your name. TLC stands for the ‘The Learning Channel’ and you take a certain amount of pride in the fact that you’re really trying to teach your viewers something about the world. Please don’t get me wrong, I’ve learned a lot from you guys.

For example ‘What Not To Wear’ taught me exactly why people looked at me funny when I rocked my red-tee-tucked-into-my-red-sweatpants look for two years. You helped me get out of that phase and I appreciate you for that. Additionally, all your programming about sex that involves heavy use of x-ray footage of coitus allowed me to realize just how disgusting human anatomy can be and gave me a bunch of great facts to drop at the bar.

But let’s be real for a minute. There’s someone working for your organization who isn’t doing his job. You know who I’m talking about. Steve, the guy who’s been naming all your documentaries. He’s phoning that sh*t in and you know it. Now, I know he’s your wife’s cousin and he’s going through a rough patch right now, but it’s time to cut that guy loose.

I can imagine your meetings now:

TLC Managing Director of Content : Alright Steve, we’ve got a piece about a guy who does steroids and has a terrible addiction to them and his arms explode. Need something edgy. Something to really grab that audience.
Steve: THE MAN WHO’S ARMS EXPLODED. (more…)

Complete Video of Last Night’s Red Sox Brawl

…And The Number One Reason NOT to Get WiiFit!

Lunar Dust Concrete May Lead to Construction on Moon

EuroTrips’s Michelle Trachtenberg Got Even HOTTER!

Most Insane Office Melt Down I’ve Seen To Date

Little League For Nascar Drivers

Photos Of Evander Holyfield’s $10 Million Foreclosed Estate

Keeley Hazell is Back Doin’ What She Does Best.. Posing Topless! [Very NSFW]

Sadly, Dwayne Johnson Has Retired “The Rock.”

Notorious NFL Steroid Dealer And Girlfriend Found Shot Dead

Slightly Irrational Fears: Sex Tape

Was She Trying To Be Funny?

It’s pretty obvious that 50 Cent and Timbaland have most likely dabbled in various “performance-enhancing” drugs – but R&B singer Mary J. Blige? What good could possibly come out of Blige taking ‘roids?

I’m baffled…and intrigued!

The Times Union reported that Blige and the other celebs in question used fake names to order and pick up prescriptions in Florida from Dr. Gary Brandwein, who was tied to the steroid scandal involving deceased WWF wrestler Chris Benoit.

Wyclef Jean and Tyler Perry have also been named as steroid users in the article, but who cares? I can’t get over Mary J. “Not Gon’ Cry” Blige. Seriously: if it’s true I’ll be floored and very confused. Couldn’t she just take coke and pills like any other maladjusted superstar?

Nothing confuses me more than singers like Blige (and Whitney Houston too, for that matter) that release these inspirational songs that middle-aged moms go nuts over, just to debunk their own myth by plummeting deep into drugs, depression and overall indecency.

It’s a funny world we live in, folks.

It has been 2 weeks since George Mitchell released his scathing report that accused Roger Clemens (and many others) of juicing. Today, “The Rocket” speaks.

Is Roger Clemens Guilty?