Being the sexually active, irresponsible college student that I am, I’ve gone home with my fair share of random girls, and over the past couple of years I’ve come across some sleeping habits that annoy the hell out of me. Nothing is worse than having a peaceful night’s sleep ruined by your hookup’s uncontrollable unconscious tendencies.

These night time nuisances can also lead to a couple of sticky situations. If you’re at her place you can always leave, but what if you’re miles from home and it’s four in the morning and you don’t feel like walking and don’t have the number for a cab? What do you do then? And if you’re at your place how should you handle it? Do you wake her ass up and hope she doesn’t start again when she falls back to sleep, or can you just kick someone out at that point? Is it really that mean if you call and pay for a cab? There’s also the high road; sacrifice your night’s sleep, suck it up and wait for morning when she’ll wake up and leave on her own.

The worst part is, you can’t look at a person and guess that these are coming, no matter the size, shape, or color of the girl anyone could potentially be an awful bed partner, and rarely do they warn you that something might be coming. That should be a common courtesy, like warning someone that you have HPV.

But I digress. Anyway, here are five habits that annoy me more than most: (more…)

Keep eating those extra-value meals, fatty – you’ll get the last laugh.

Spray Pancakes: the wave of the future…I think. I hope.

VIDEO: Man-boobs finally have a purpose other than being poked fun at.

Pat Robertson (conservative) endorses Rudy Giuliani (uh…not very conservative by comparison).

Stealing $2.25 from an elementary school cafeteria is the new “stealing candy from a baby.”

Best. World. Record. Ever.

Everybody’s favorite murdering-ex-football-star is currently under investigation for attempting to steal sports memorabilia from Palace Station Casino in Las Vegas.

While no arrests have been made O.J. is still a target suspect and currently still in Vegas. Unfortunately for the former Heisman Trophy winner, whatever happens in Vegas will not stay in Vegas, as everything he ever does – sneezing, coughing, farting, writing books, murdering – is under the watchful eye of the entire planet.

Earlier this year Simpson was denied service at a steakhouse in Louisville, Kentucky. After Simpson and friends quietly left the restaurant – always watch out for the quiet ones – his lawyer, Yale Galanter, had this to say to the steakhouse’s owner, Jeff Ruby:

“[Jeff Ruby] screwed with the wrong guy.”

Tell me about it! Who wants beef with O.J.? (more…)