Hi. It’s me, Man. How are things? Probably not so good — that’s been the general gist of human history, best I can tell from every conversation your and my kind have matched wits for during the last few hundred thousand years. Am I right? You won’t admit it, but I knew it. I’m not dumb; I figure it’s something we stupid men did. So instead of fighting, I’m just gonna lay a few things out for you, on behalf of every other man that ever existed.

I’m not dumb; I figure it’s something or other we stupid men did. So on behalf of all other men everywhere, here’s a list of ten things we just gotta tell you. I’m sure you won’t listen, but you’re always saying I never want to talk, so here goes nothing.

If you think American football is the most badass, then you haven’t seen the Australian version. I don’t know what any of the rules are, but apparently body-checking a dude so hard it makes him look like a rag doll is totally legal. … Click to read more