If you watched the VP debate last night you heard a lot about Sarah Palin’s BFF, Joe Six Pack. But who is he? What does he like? What does he do?We don’t know Joe Six Pack personally (though we have hooked up with his cousin, Mark Quarter Barrel…who could not keep it up), but we imagine he’d be something like this:

Description:
5′11, brown hair, brown eyes, some sort of facial hair, big hands and a tattoo of some sort (possibly his kids’ initials) on his upper arm. No actual six pack to be seen behind the slight beer belly hanging over the top of his ill-fitting denim. Read More »

Hey fellas: want to know a sure-fire way to get a chiseled body without foolish, time-wasting activities like exercising and a healthy diet? Want to throw back a six-pack while maintaining some sick, six-pack abs? It can be done – all you have to do is get “abdominal etching,” which is a nice way to say “male liposuction.”

Six-pack surgery is a medical procedure that sucks that extra fat out of your beer gut followed by the etching in of faux-abs, all for the cost of a semester’s tuition. The outcome looks like you lost a couple pounds and applied magic marker to your stomach in hopes of fooling anybody willing to see your obvious lack of physique.

It’s unbelievable that guys would actually go to these extremes. Contrary to popular belief, there are at least three types of girls when it comes to body appreciation: girls who want their man chiseled and defined; girls who love rail-thin body types and girls that can’t get enough of beer-guzzling, hoagie-scarfing men who enjoy enjoying themselves. If you feel inclined to mangle your body with pricey surgery, the most may be better spent on a shrink. (more…)

Yuengling, the yeast from the east. Not many west-coasters have experienced the cheap-yet-digestible taste that America’s Oldest Brewery provides.

Similar to Coors in its smoothness Yuengling is a staple of Northeastern frat-parties and post-college keggers. Its neutral taste hardly offends, with decent head and a nice honey-grain finish. Guys and gals alike love Yuengling.

Comparable to Corona in value, Yuengling is cheap enough to buy in bulk yet quality enough to pass off as “good beer.” (You know what I mean: “Hey, I don’t feel like drinking canned sh*t – can you pick up some good beer?”)

Experts in the beer-drinking field (read: alcoholics) tend to call Yuengling a “lawnmower beer,” perfect for outdoor drinking while doing heavy-duty yard work. While I can’t say that I’ve knocked back a case while operating heavy machinery, I have sipped one while taking out the trash – does that count?

Still, I must admit: Yuengling’s low alcohol content takes it down a half-notch in overall…drinkability? Yes, drinkability. (more…)

Ever heard of a “chelada”? Not enchilada, although those are really rad…but that’s neither here or there.

A chelada is a Mexican style of beer that’s flavored with lime and salt (Corona with salt, basically). The drink is popular in Mexico and Costa Rica but has yet to become a hit in America. The day where cheladas are popular in the U.S. has been set back a decade or so with the release of Miller Chill, a poor excuse for a beer.

Miller Chill apes that mask-the-awful-taste-with-limes-and-salt formula cheladas have down pat – with an unfortunate twist. Chill contains the flavor of artificial limes and salt that leaves an aftertaste similar to flat Sprite lingering in your mouth.

Miller Chill tastes like sour soda.

Usually my preference for a certain kind of beer is nonexistent – I enjoy Negro Modello as much as I do a bootleg brand like Schlitz, when the occasion hits – but Chill is plain ill. Drinking it to get wasted is much more difficult than regular brews due to its kiddie-sweet flavor. After convincing my bro to share a six-pack of the stuff with me he opted out after one-and-a-half beers. (more…)