An 84 year old man has a horn growing out of his head, a 37 year old man who is NOT a former Pro Bowl running back gave a mind blowing present to an ex girlfriend and Sega wants you to pee on their newest release. Read more after the jump!

Nothing says “I love you” like a sweat-stained, back-scratched, toe-curled, romp in your Dad’s Hummer. There is no denying that sex in any public place poses it’s problems for the randy philanderer. Worry no more, we offer you the following rules for making sure that your next Ford Fusion doesn’t crash and burn.

• 9 Signs That She Is “The One”

• How You Spent Thanksgiving Night

• 5 Creepiest Sex Toys Ever Made

• Guess Who’s Coming To Dinner

• Sexy Girls Playing Soccer

• Rihanna’s Booty Wakes Up America

This dude created the world’s biggest alarm clock, which is not only controlled by a computer, it’s hooked up to hydraulics and pretty much proves that he has no friends. Besides just waking you up (in a way that would immediately launch me into a murderous rage), this thing can also serve as a pretty sweet sexy toy bed -but I’m sure he never thought of that…

Forget the Nintendo Wii: Bodybouncer is the new front-runner for best Christmas present of the year. It’s one of those gifts similar to sexy lingerie that you buy for your girl that’s really a gift for yourself.
The Bodybouncer is a sex toy designed to make you feel like you’re having zero-gravity sex. Judging from appearance – I do… Click to read more

You know what’s so weird, yet so understandable? If a women gets caught masturbating with some wacky device most guys would say, “niiiiiice” and be turned on. Now, if a girl walked in on a sweaty dude huffing and puffing away, plugging some doll…well, it’s not exactly a turn-on, is it?
But wait, sex-starved fellas! Your time… Click to read more