Four teams now stand poised on the brink of World Cup glory: Spain, Germany, Holland, and Uruguay. Winning the ultimate prize in world football would represent something magnificent for each of those countries, but with varying degrees of breathless wonder.
Urugay vs. Netherlands, July 6.
Germany vs. Spain, July 7.
Germany (as West Germany) has won the Wo… Click to read more

It takes more than god, cocaine, and undetected handballs to win a World Cup, at least in 2010. The young, ruthlessly efficient German team delivered a wholesale beatdown to Diego Maradona’s Argentina, and exposed the self-besotted leprechaun as a complete clown. It may be true that Maradona practically won the 1986 World Cup singlehandedly, as a m… Click to read more

Two things we learned, at least, from the Holland vs. Brazil match today, is that Jesus hates Brazil, and it’s always important to stay Melo. Brazil’s Kaka is the world’s most expensive striker and was expected to be one of the stars of this World Cup. Known for praying on the pitch after the 2002 World Cup win, and for revealing messages like “I belong to Jesus” on his t-shirts beneath his team jersey after scoring, apparently Jesus’ infatuation with Brazilian soccer is at an end.

The only thing more awesome than taunting your opponent is getting PWND by said opponent and getting a taste of your own medicine. Case in point: The Cartwheeling goalie. They don’t call it the beautiful game for nothing.