I can totally understand why someone would want to know how to breath fire. It’s a freakin’ awesome trick. But the thing about breathing fire that people forget to fully realize is that not knowing what the hell you’re doing can result in burning your f**king face off. Like this dude…

OK, I have no F’ing clue what the hell is going on here. Apparently the actress sitting at the table really pissed off of the reporters listening to the press conference, something about “not dressing appropriately for the weather,” because right after that, somebody takes a table slam to the head. Either that, or this is just some Ali G-type prank to get us to see the movie.

Lower back pains? Knees bothering you? Weak ankles? The solution to your problems may not be more padding, healing salves or the latest miracle supplement. The answer you’ve been looking for could be a good run. Your little league baseball coach may have been on to something when he told you to, “Walk if off.”

It’s not just running any way you want though, this is a very special, secret running style that only I can teach you. So listen to what I have to say and then get off your fat ass and go for a jog.

I discovered the magical, healing powers of this kind of running about a year ago when I realized I was getting fat. (more…)

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OOOOUUUUUUUUCCHH!! F**K ME! That has got to hurt. It helps to remember that your friends build sh*tty ramps and you suck at riding bikes, before trying the gap at top speed. If you’d thought of that first, maybe your face wouldn’t look like that now.