Out of the myriad of things wrong with today’s society, we need to thank Matt and Trey for calling attention to one of the greatest underlying causes of racial tension in the United States. Urination etiquette is of course the underlying issue, but as we all learned last night – there are just too many minorities in our waterparks. (To be fair though, there are a growing number of fat white people wearing t-shirts in the pool as well.)

(Check Out The Full Episode Here)

Not My Water Park – Lyrics

What has happened to this place
I don’t recognize it anymore
It used to be so fun and special
What is life worth living for

The dream is dead
Our land is gone
There’s a hole in my heart
And I can’t go on

There are too many minorities (minorities)
At my water park (my water park)
This was our land, our dream (our dream)
and they’ve taken it all away

They just keep coming and coming (minorities)
I tried to go and tell the police
But even the authorities
Are minorities (are minorities)
At my water park

There’s no place for me to sit anymore
And the lines just keep getting crazier
There are Mexicans all around me
The lazy river has never been lazier

It’s a 40 minute wait to go down one slide
And the instructions are in Spanish on the Zip Line ride (just do it in English!)

There are too many minorities (too many)
At my water park (somebody do something)
Where did they all come from
Why can’t they leave this land alone

And it’s such a tragedy (feel a bit like dying)
We looked the other way too long
We’ve got to change our priorities
And get all these minorities
Out of my water park

(Minorities) Mexicans and Asians
Black people
I think I even saw Native Americans (gross)

God I’m asking please
Get all of these minorities
Out of my water park (my water park)

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By Evan Kessler

Back in 2005, three veterans of the Austin, Texas music scene, bassist Steve Terebecki, drummer Josh Block and singer-guitarist James Petralli, joined forces for what would become White Denim. The band debuted with their 2008 release, Workout Holiday, and the single, “Let’s Talk About It” garnered them a healthy following in the UK. But it’s their latest album, Fits, that they hope will give them some due attention back home. (more…)

Unless you’re overly paranoid, you’re able to get through the day without fear of being killed in some random accident you have no way of knowing is going to happen. You know, like crossing the street without expecting a freakin’ city bus to come along and nearly wipe out with an SUV. But after watching this video, that’s all done with.

Say what you will about what to do with the war in Afghanistan, but if this video is any indication, things are going to be completely and totally f**ked there for quite some time. This is a Afghani Peace Day rally, and some white doves are being released as a symbol of peace. Problem is, one of the doves isn’t exactly fit to fly…

Ask anyone with any musical sense whatsoever what the worst band of all-time is, and 4 out of 7 times, they’ll say Creed. The complete and utter douchiness of this band is almost incredible. But when I cam across this little number, I have to say, this is the best Creed song I’ve ever heard.

In general, the world is a horribly hard, unfair place. The rich get richer, the poor get poorer, and everybody’s pretty much pissed off all the time. But every so often, the stars align perfectly, and that douchebag who parked his Porsche illegally in the bust lane gets rammed. God, that must have felt good…

Sony has been on a roll lately. Last week, they introduced the PS3 Slim, today Sony introduced the Daily Edition Reader at the New York Public Library. The new device, is part of their new eReader lineup which includes the Pocket Edition (5-inch screen, $200) and the Touch Edition (6-inch screen for $300).

The Daily Edition looks great and will be giving Amazon’s Kindle a run for its money. Why, you ask? Let’s take a look at what the the Sony Daily Edition Reader has to offer to find out if its better than the current Amazon Kindle.

Check out the full story, here!

This morning, we came across what has to be the sweetest internet radio station of all-time: 1015thepole.com. No, you’re not going to find your favorite indie bands on here, you f**king hipsters. What you are going to get is non-stop stripper tunes that’ll send you straight back to that night you got the clap. I mean, the name of the radio station is The Pole! Jesus Christ…

On top of the strip club music, The Pole also provides you will all your stripper wants and needs, like pictures of strippers, interviews with strippers and a g*ddamn employee bathroom webcam. These guys mean business. So if you don’t have time (or the permission) to hit up your local strip club, just tune into The Pole – it’s damn-near as good.

Kick the tires and light the fires, big daddy, because it’s time for Sturgis 2009! This year’s massive motorcycle meet-up is so wild and crazy, even Aerosmith’s Steven Tyler can’t go without ending up in the hospital. So to get you up to speed on this wild hog-fest, we’ve compiled The Good, The Bad and The Ugly ladies of Sturgis.

The Good are the types of girls you all know and love here at COED – hot, sexy and wearing very little clothing. The Bad are the misbehaving biker babes that could drink you under the table, kick your ass with their pinky finger, and look smokin’ hot doing it. And The Ugly are just as naked as the first two, but so horribly revolting we couldn’t help but include them, just for their shock value. So tell us, which are your favorite kind of gals?

The Good

The Bad

The Ugly