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Tonight marks the beginning of the eighth season of American Idol, and that means a bunch of dumbasses making fools of themselves on national television. Good times, all around. But while many of the people that show up for the audition are about as talented as a nut sack, some of them truly rocked the house.

So to remember the few to pass through the audition gauntlet unscathed by Simon Cowel’s dickheadedness, we’ve put together a video compilation of all the first auditions of the notable acts to come out of the American Idol star-machine. This is the first time America ever got a glimpse of these talented individuals, before their PR team took over and your grandmother started wearing screen-printed sweatshirts of their faces. First up, the ladies… and once you’re done browsing check out the dudes’ auditions at College Candy. (more…)

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Oh, Myspace! How we love denying all your porn spam. How we love the hours we spend perusing your bad, drunken poetry and those lovely 3 a.m. photos of beer pong. Wait a second…

The next time we log in to MySpace, let’s just hit delete. January 30 is International Delete Your MySpace Account Day. The idea was started by Bloggasm’s Simon Owens, who realized life is too short to wait for excessive banner ads to load.

Do we really need to know when the kid who sits behind us in Chemistry class celebrates his birthday? Do we really enjoy all those crappy Kelly Clarkson songs blaring from random profiles? And let’s not even get into Top 8 drama. Think of the hours we could save by not stalking people online. Maybe we’d have time to study for that quiz after all. (more…)