Has it finally happened? Are people finally ready to stop taking cheap shots at Britney Spears (both literally and figuratively) and start locking her up?
Maybe, according to the swarm of paps:
You would think it was the night of Princess Di’s accident the way all forms of media clustered around the ambulance housing Britney Spears, who was under the influence of drugs when she was picked up for psychiatric evaluation, following refusal to turn over custody of her kids to K-Fed’s bodyguard.
It’s disgusting how out of control this situation has become.
Instead of continuing to see Spears as a perennial punching bag how about we all look at her for what she really is: a complete mess with two children taking zero responsibility for her actions. To think people still stick up for her makes me sick; her family should feel ashamed and halfway responsible. Britney Spears needs to be locked up and forgotten about, not empathized with.
As if the media hasn’t spent enough time ravaging the metaphorical colon of people across the internet and TV, we arrive at the next stage in celebrity gossip evolution (or Creative Design if you are from Kansas)…the legal battle.
So here it is: Casey Aldridge, a.k.a. Little Spears’ Babby-daddy, is either 17, 18 or 19. Unfortunately, white trash don’t keep good records and for some reason there is a some discussion as to how old he is.
People are looking at Casey’s MySpace page, which has him at 17; his old school records that have him at 19. However, the latter records come from his Principal, who is trying to hold the school yearbooks to make extra money. It’s about as trustworthy as the Mitchell Report.
My roommate is pre-law, so here is the $.50 tour:
- If he is 17, he is just another genius who knocked up a Spears girl and won the “K-Fed Lottery”
- If he is 18, there are some state statutes that would allow for a 2 year differentiation between consent and statutory rape
I’m an equal-opportunity reviewer. Top 40 pop is hardly my favorite kind of music, but gimme (gimme) a well-crafted album of well-produced pop and I”ll find nothing but praise for it.
So, Blackout: it’s low-energy, manufactured trash. To hate Britney Spears the Person is commonplace and expected; but hating Britney Spears the Artist – “artist” has never sounded so poor – sparks violent criticism from the lowest depths of the music-listening community: teenyboppers. (more…)
You think the emergence of bling-bling, misogyny, violence, Vanilla Ice and K-Fed are the worst things to ever happen to hip-hop? The following three videos will make you beg for “PopoZao.”
Brace yourself, son.
Watch the World’s Worst Rap Songs after the jump!(more…)
After 13 innings, the Colorado Rockies take the NL Wild Card from the San Diego Padres. (Yahoo)
Schools the world over ban hugs between students. See? I was right in 7th grade – hugs do get you pregnant! (My Way)
Britney Spears, fresh off losing custody of her kids, shows up at the Peninsula Hotel in Beverly Hills, spending her cash and flashing her ass. I can’t believe I’m starting to like – nay, love – K-Fed. (TMZ)
I can’t possibly expand on this: “Sex in Car: Hooker Mom Snorts Cocaine Off Baby’s Stomach While Breastfeeding.” (Breitbart)
Hillary Clinton’s laugh (dubbed the “Clinton Cackle”) is no laughing matter. (Wonkette)
Garry Kasparov: world chess champion, Russian and…presidential candidate in Russia? (CBS)
“Over the past few months, we’ve all watched Britney Spears experience a decline in her personal life; her dismal performance at Sunday night’s MTV VMA performance suggested that Ms. Spears’ professional pursuits have also suffered.
In this context, it’s easy to forget that there was a time when Britney was every man’s fantasy… that this is the same woman who, in June of 2000, was offered millions of dollars in exchange for her virginity.”
“So now you remember that Britney was once hot. But when was she at her hottest? Or is that time yet to come? We’ve thrown together a few musical moments to help jog your memory.”
Long ago, before K-Fed, kids, wack tracks and bald-headed insanity, there was Britney Spears: The Most Boneable Girl on Planet Earth.
Remember her sassy schoolgirl phase? Remember her skin-tight red catsuit? Remember when she cooed “Kitty, kitty” and gyrated in “Slave 4 U”? Remember when she stuck her tongue down Madonna’s throat? Remember when Britney was hot?
We here at CO-ED remember.
To commemorate Brit’s past boneability is our first edition of “Morning Wood,” a collection of hand-picked photos that ensure maximum wood in the morning hours.
The blog-universe has been giving the seal of approval to Britneyâs leaked songs since early this week â have I been listening to the wrong ones?
These tracks are complete tripe. There is no way somebody with working eardrums can possibly give a âthumbs-upâ? to Britâs latest batch of bimbo-pop.
Even hipsters looking for their next bastion of irony will be thoroughly disappointed.
The three songs â âGimme More,â? âCold as Fire,â? âBaby Boyâ? â each have flat, lifeless production left over from the last millennium. This major mistake couldâve been easily remedied with the right collaborators (hint, hint).
Check out Britney Spears’ new tracks after the jump.