There are a ton of places you can masturbate privately and safely. Yet, there are some folks (*cough* George Michael *cough* Paul Reubens*) who just can’t keep it in their pants. Recently, ESPN producer Neil Goldberg was caught masturbating on a stool outside his neighbor’s window while she got dressed. While we admire Neil’s gusto, we suggest taking the easy route and taping her for viewing enjoyment later. No harm. No foul. Right, Erin Andrews? Here are the six WORST places to get caught pullin’ the pud…

It was about 1:30 in the morning on a Thursday night and I was doing what most red blooded males do–masturbate.
In my room with the door shut and the lights out, my laptop was sitting on my legs, while the headphones were in my ears. I was navigating through the wide world of internet porn when suddenly my female roommate comes bursting through the door. The… Click to read more