The mainstream media is biased, but not just in terms of Left or Right. See, the only candidates in the presidential race that are getting any coverage are the McCain/Palin and Obama/Biden tickets. But did you know that our country has way more than just Republicans and Democrats?

Sure, we all know about the Green and Libertarian parties, but there are plenty of other crazy bastards who have thrown their names in the hat as viable candidates for the White House. So, to make sure we have the most informed audience out there, COED is proud to present to you, the Presidential Candidates on the Fringe.

Jack Grimes
If you’re tired of thinking for yourself and want someone to make decisions for you then vote for Jack Grimes of the United Facist Union. Clad in his trademark Roman Centurion helmet, Mr. Grimes (or Grimey) wants to establish a totalitarian, corporate state in the tradition of such leaders as Saddam Hussein and Mussolini. How could you not vote for this guy? (more…)

I don’t get it.

Having proven that the State of Florida cannot handle relatively simple tasks, as was the case in the last Presidential Election, Florida’s Broward and Miami-Dade counties have announced that they will buck the state’s recommendations for handling voters flagged by the controversial Florida Voter Verification Law. I am not exactly sure who they think this will benefit, but it is ultimately bad for America.

When the election of the President of the United State becomes a political game and a pawn for either party, we have taken a serious step backwards in the upholding of our most cherished freedom. Whether you choose to “Vote or Die” or whatever dumb-sh*t anthem Hollywood will be chanting next week, the problem is real.

How can one state’s political system decide to jeapardize the voice of the whole country? Not that it will, but given the electoral college’s power, a screw-up in Florida could mean the difference between who controls one of the most influential countries in the world. These are the same people who screwed up the “butterfly ballot” and most of which have no idea how to work their TiVos. My grandmother lives in Florida and calls me every week when House is on so that she can record it and watch it the next day – so she can fast-forward through the commercials.

Oh yeah – these people are going to screw it up again…just watch!

To find out exactly who’s telling the truth and who’s full of moose sh*t in tomorrow’s vice presidential debate between Gov. Sarah Palin and Sen. Joe Biden, then head over to RealScoop.com.

The site, which official launches tomorrow (it’s in beta now), has developed a technology that makes it possible to tell when they’re on the level and when they’re pulling your leg. Unlike lie detectors, which measure stress levels, Real Scoop’s technology measures emotional states based on variances in voice tones. They then apply this technology to videos of celebrities and politicians and post them on the site for your nit-picking pleasure. (more…)

To begin, it doesn’t matter how we got where we are. I really don’t care how often Obama wants to talk about who is to blame, but we are here now, we are screwed and we have to get out. YES, we know, McCain was not voted Miss Congeniality…we heard. And yes, no one really knows how to pronounce Ahmadinejad – we got it.

The sad part is, we sat around COED office drinking and watching the debate – and when it was done, we started talking and it was quite obvious that we were all watching different debates.

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Well, this election is certainly shaping up to be crazy as f**k! With McCain’s pick of Gov. Sarah Palin as his vice presidential choice and the historic presidential run of Barack Obama as the first black nominee of a major party in the Western world, no matter the outcome, history will be made. And all bets are off.

Will Obama turn out new voters in unprecedented numbers? Will Palin solidify the Republican base? Nobody yet knows. But what we do know is that whatever the outcome, it’s going to be interesting!

Who do you think will win the presidential election?

(photo credit: Pat Keegan, The Freckled Finger)

We think so. Not that our word is worth jack – we know chicks, boobs, liquor and sports…and we know them well. However, given the recent sh*t storm of the Russian/Georgian conflict, even we knew this was coming.

Let’s go down the list of necessary qualifications: Biden has been known to cross partisan lines in the past (Check) ; He has more international experience than almost every other senator (Check); He is an older white guy that redneck southerners can say they voted for (Check); He is not Hillary Clinton (question mark).

On paper and in person, Joe Biden could be the smartest Vice-Presidential pick in recent history. Anyone who listens to him talk thinks back to the days of old school leaders, not politicians or beaurocrats. The question is now, will it be enough. McCain’s “Straight-talk Express” is driving him right back into the race, and if he announces his VP soon, we can have ourselves a pretty decent race on our hands.