We did it, world: through cutting-edge technology we have invented a canned cheeseburger.

Now before you get too excited, sit back for a second and realize this is it - we have reached the limits of human creativity. There is nothing left to invent, nothing left to do.

My only gripe is the canned burger’s Kalorien intake; it’s a bit high for my tastes. I’m trying to cut back on Kohlenhydrates too, but hey - beggars can’t be choosers, right? At least it’s not like Spam. Wait…

Next stop: free universal health care!