Tweens across the nation are in a tizzy over today’s release of New Moon, the much-anticipated second installment in the Twilight Saga.  And as much as we love Ashley Greene, Nikki Reed, vampires and werewolves, for our money SNL’s Firelight parody with Taylor Swift as one of the Franks beats New Moon in spades.  Twilight Bad, Firelight Good.

Erin Lucas is one of my favorite up-and-coming celebrity hotties for numerous reasons. Since leaving MTV’s reality show The City life for Erin has been pretty exciting. In August Erin did an ultra saultry photoshoot for Maxim Magazine and while Joanna Krupa was on the cover of the issue most would agree that Erin was the highlight.  As a follow-up to the side boob-tastic Maxim shoot Erin was named to our list of 20 Sexiest Rock Star Spawn. Now, Erin is at it again putting her acting skills to work for a new StyleCaster short film called “Bonnie + Bonnie.” The video is flatout incredible and hint-hint at 2:20 minute mark she has a hot lesbian kiss scene, is there any reason not to watch this video immediately?

Out of the myriad of things wrong with today’s society, we need to thank Matt and Trey for calling attention to one of the greatest underlying causes of racial tension in the United States. Urination etiquette is of course the underlying issue, but as we all learned last night – there are just too many minorities in our waterparks. (To be fair though, there are a growing number of fat white people wearing t-shirts in the pool as well.)

(Check Out The Full Episode Here)

Not My Water Park – Lyrics

What has happened to this place
I don’t recognize it anymore
It used to be so fun and special
What is life worth living for

The dream is dead
Our land is gone
There’s a hole in my heart
And I can’t go on

There are too many minorities (minorities)
At my water park (my water park)
This was our land, our dream (our dream)
and they’ve taken it all away

They just keep coming and coming (minorities)
I tried to go and tell the police
But even the authorities
Are minorities (are minorities)
At my water park

There’s no place for me to sit anymore
And the lines just keep getting crazier
There are Mexicans all around me
The lazy river has never been lazier

It’s a 40 minute wait to go down one slide
And the instructions are in Spanish on the Zip Line ride (just do it in English!)

There are too many minorities (too many)
At my water park (somebody do something)
Where did they all come from
Why can’t they leave this land alone

And it’s such a tragedy (feel a bit like dying)
We looked the other way too long
We’ve got to change our priorities
And get all these minorities
Out of my water park

(Minorities) Mexicans and Asians
Black people
I think I even saw Native Americans (gross)

God I’m asking please
Get all of these minorities
Out of my water park (my water park)

Check Out These Other Posts

Where Whitney Houston’s singing of the Star Spangled Banner at Super Bowl XXV in 1991 could be considered one of the finest renditions of the National Anthem, this girl singing at a high school football game could go down as one of the worst, right next to Roseanne Barr. If this school holds auditions for singing the National Anthem before a game it make me wonder, who did this chick beat?

The only thing more awesome than taunting your opponent is getting PWND by said opponent and getting a taste of your own medicine.  Case in point: The Cartwheeling goalie.  They don’t call it the beautiful game for nothing.

Tomorrow COED will be covering the 2009 mtvU Woodie Awards, live from the Roseland Ballroom in NYC.  We’ll be on the red carpet schmoozing with the celebrity attendees including our favorite blue-eyed, black-haired beauty Zooey Deschanel and COED’s biggest fan Pete Wentz. And if that wasn’t enough, we’ll be playing beer pong, doing keg stands and checking out performances from Clipse & Rick Ross, Passion Pit, Death Cab For Cutie, Matt and Kim, and Jack White’s new band Dead Weather!  Be sure to check back Thursday for pics and clips from what promises to be a good drunken night of debauchery.

The show will be broadcast across all MTV channels at 10PM ET on December 4th so make sure you tune in. For now enjoy music from this year’s performers and nominees – click the thumbnails below to reveal new music from the artist that you will certainly enjoy.

(click thumbnails to watch music videos)

(more…)

Look out WOW freakout kid, the British are coming and they are serious about their videogames.  Sure you put a remote up your bum and hit yourself in the head with a shoe, but you got nothin’ on your English Doppelganger.  After a 17 hour run on Modern Warfare 2, his gloves are off and it’s just knuckles and wall.

This has to be – hands-down – one of the most awesome stories in all of sports. If you’re not familiar with Doc Ellis and his infamous no-hitter: Back in 1970 Pittsburgh Pirate pitcher Dock Ellis threw a no-hitter on LSD. Yes, on LSD. If you’ve ever done LSD, you know what an impossible, mind-crushing feat that is. Hell, just being in public while tripping is a horrifying chore. How he pulled this off, we will never know…

YouTube is, of course, good for finding videos of people making fools of themselves. But it’s also good for finding a ton of useful videos. This one goes in the “What would I do if…” category. Basically, this police badass teaches you everything you need to know if someone holds you at gun point. Maybe not the most practical information in the world, but it certainly makes you feel like more of a badass knowing that.

If I’ve said this once, I’ve said it a million times: If you’re going to propose to your girlfriend in front of tens of thousands of people, you better be 100-percent sure that she’s going to say yes. (And that she doesn’t mind having a very personal moment shared with the general public.) Because, if you don’t, you’re going to end up looking like a total dipsh*t. You know, like this guy…