There’s a difference between “getting away from it all” and really getting away from it all. The former may be achieved by visiting a resort in Cuba or the Dominican Republic, while the latter requires a little more effort (and cash). To escape to a spot that even an exiled Napoleon could relate to, consider dropping some serious dough on a private island rental.

These tropical spots are full of first-class amenities, offer beautiful ocean views and, best of all, provide rest, relaxation and solitude. To make your choice easier, here are the 10 best private island rentals. Note: all rates are listed in U.S. dollars.

Check out the Top 10 Private Islands (You Can Actually Rent)

Tomorrow is Cinco de Mayo – and anyone with access to alcohol is going to be celebrating the beautiful tradition of getting wasted off their ass, Mexico-style. So to give you an idea of what you’re in for, we’re re-posting my first-hand experience with the joys hazards of downing a little too much of the Mexican liquor:

Everyone I’ve ever met has a dark past with tequila. Just the mention of it makes their face go sour–the shots, the smell, the blinding drunk, and a hellacious hangover the next morning. For some reason, I am not one of those people. But after my family vacation to Mexico last week, I learned a bit about another South-of-the-Border brew: Mezcal.

Like tequila (which is actually a type of mezcal), mezcal is made from agave, a cactus-like plant, native to Mexico. Mezcals are often aged, in oak barrels, for two months to seven years, giving the alcohol a brown coloration and woody flavor, but are available un-aged and clear.

Connoisseurs will tell you the best mezcals come from the Mexican state of Oaxaca (wah-hock-ah). To fully enjoy the complexities of this subtle liquor, go to the city of Oaxaca, the state’s capital, who’s colonial architecture and friendly people only add to the liquor’s historic mystic. And also serves as the perfect setting to get way, way too drunk. Read More »

Have you ever stayed in a budget motel? It’s like playing amateur forensic scientist. Depending on what things you find on your pillow and under your bed, you can almost unravel a scene to a crime. I especially hate those A&E true crime documentaries where they take the black light and investigate a motel room’s bedspread and find over 47 different semen stains. Eeeeeew!

What are some of the most disgusting budget motel related mishaps? Here’re a few I found on Motel website complaint boards that will make you consider camping on your next road trip” (more…)

There are so many things to do in Cabo if you find yourself in Mexico. But some people, particularly west coasters just looking for a quick fix, can only get away for the weekend. If you’ve got a weekend in Cabo, figuring out exactly what to do is of course up to you, but below is what I’d recommend based on the few days I recently spent in Cabo. This list does not include your typical spring-break partying spots, but if those are what you’re looking for, I have faith you can find them without my help. If you’ve got suggestions besides these, leave them in a comment for our readers! (more…)

There are a billion things to do in New Orleans. There are a billion sounds, tastes, and sights. But if you only have a weekend in New Orleans, like I did, you’re going to want to make sure you’re seeing things that will really top your list. I can only speak for myself, but if you’re clueless about how to spend your weekend in New Orleans, I’d highly recommend the following–all things I did myself. Note: If you have some other helpful suggestions of what to do and see in New Orleans over a weekend visit, leave them in a comment on here for our readers! (more…)

What to do while traveling and what not to do. These are things you should know. Every city, every state, country, region…they’re all different. And I’m here to tell you what to do and what not to do based on my own experiences. Starting with Atlantic City, New Jersey.

Let’s pretend you find yourself in Atlantic City, New Jersey. There’s likely only one reason why: gambling. Gambling is legal and blossoming in this grim and gray beach town. If you East-Coasters can’t afford the trip to the desert’s Las Vegas to give your luck at the Black Jack table a turn, Atlantic City is where you’ll likely end up for your gambling getaway. But beware…A.C. is no Las Vegas. I recently visited the city and have these pieces of advice for you: (more…)

Branson, Missouri is coined “The Live Music Show Capital of the World.” This is where Russian funnyman, Yakov Smirnoff has the Yakov Smirnoff Theater. It’s also one of the worst places I’ve ever been to—hands down. Hint: To make Branson really creepy, travel there during the winter months when most of the shows are shut down.

Here’re a few reasons why Branson Missouri is such a sh!thole: (more…)

Knob Creek is the home of the largest military weaponry show and machine gun shoot. It’s located, I sh!t you not, in Bullit County Kentucky. This is where good ol’ folks like to blow things up REAL GOOD. I spent a weekend at this blessed event. And here’s some weaponry fun you can have.

Like a giant video game, the shooting range is scattered with shot-up cars, large wooden spools and, for some reason, ovens. Large American flags flap proudly over the shooting area. Safety standards are an afterthought. A spray-painted red line designates where the large, surging crowd should stand as numerous assault weapons spray bullets. One guy fires too soon, spraying bullets just feet in front of him. A loaded clip falls out of the magazine of another. Shells fly everywhere. The orange-shirted security personnel are the only people without guns.

Three vendors rent a multitude of assault weapons and machine guns — everything from M16s to AK47s. It’s time to blow some sh!t up! (more…)

Scotland is a country that is part  of the United Kingdom. Occupying the northern third of the island of Great Britain, it shares a border with England to the south and is bounded by the North Sea to the east. Scotland is also kinda of f**ked up. I I just got back from spending a week there and here are 5 F**ked Up Things I encountered. (more…)

The best orgasm I’ve ever had, was 10,000 feet over San Francisco. I was in a plane. This was my induction into the Mile High Club. MHC is an exclusive club for members who’ve “done the deed” while flying in airplanes. Joining the Mile High Club makes you feel like one of those really rich, decadent people, who do things like eat animals that are endangered species.

Here’s what you’ll need to become a member.

1) Be sure you are on a plane.

This is essential. Without a plane you wont be able to fly. No flying, no mile high club.

2) Be sure to have a sex partner.

Yes! Another important step. It doesn’t induct you into the Mile High Club if you are trying to be inducted  solo.

3) Make a play for the restroom

This provides some privacy. Thought gutsy, playing “hide the sausage” in the airplane aisle will be greatly frowned upon by all on the flight. (more…)