These days, it seems as though everyone, from your professor to your little sister, has a tattoo. And some of them aren’t half bad. But if the Internet is evidence of anything, there are a hell of a lot more hilariously horrible tattoos out there than anyone would like to admit. So we made it our duty to scour for all the worst pictures the Internet has to off, giving you hundreds of examples of what not to get as your next tat. So get ready for 210 “WTF Were They Thinking?” Tattoos, because this one is gonna hurt.

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It’s Wednesday afternoon, and I feel like climbing back into bed, pulling up the covers and sleeping for as long as life will let me. But I can’t. Like most of you, I’m at work, sitting in front a computer, clicking away the hours, with heavy eyes and a case of mild irritability. So to beat away this everyday fatigue, I’ve decided to try 5-hour Energy for the first time.

To add some context: I rarely drink soda and only occasionally drink coffee or energy drinks – the caffeine is often too much for me to handle, sending my heart racing, which in turn makes me feel like my life is falling apart for no reason. Now, as I peel off the red protective plastic, I’m hoping that won’t happen. From what I’ve heard it’s everything from completely useless to the perfect pick-me-up. We shall see…

2:45 PM: Opening the tiny “lemon-lime” flavored liquid. The damn thing was expensive – should be called “5-dollar Energy”…

2:45 PM: It tastes like a weird combination of artificial sweetener and the smell of Resolve carpet cleaner – oh right, I mean “lemon-lime”.

2:46 PM: The label is telling me to “drink one half (1/2) bottle for moderate energy” or “one whole bottle for maximum energy.” I’m worried about feeling like a freak with too much caffeine, but who wants “moderate energy”? F**k it, I’m downing the whole thing.

2:47 PM: Done. Supposedly I’ll “Feel it in minutes.” The timer starts now.

2:51 PM: This is funny.

2:53 PM: Hmmmm, I think I am actually feeling a bit peppier. My head feels a little less like it’s jam-packed with cotton, but my eyes are still wanting to close more than normal.

3:03 PM: To be honest, I’m not really used to paying this much attention to my body. Usually it’s just, “Am I awake? Yes. Am I drunk? A little. Ok, cool.” Doing this makes me feel like a vegan or some other such nonsense… (more…)

Normally we don’t report on things like medical advances here at COED, but this was just a bit too SciFi awesome for me to pass up. Scientists have created contact lenses cultured from stems cell that have successfully cured blindness in patients in less than a month. And regardless of where you stand politically on the stem cell issue, there’s no denying how incredibly, amazingly awesome this is. Plus, the stem cells come straight from the patient’s own eye, so no dead future babies. High five!

So, now that we have that figured out, how about getting on to hoverboards?

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Dating is hard. Just when you think you have women figured out they throw you a curve ball, even adult film stars. Sure everyone thinks porn stars are easy, what with all the money shots. The truth is, they have standards. To learn these standards we talked to the star of COED favorite, “Strap a D**k to Me” and proprietor of Leggylana.com, Lana Cox for advice on how to woo the women of our late night fantasies. (more…)

For some guys, an offshore bank account may sound like something out of a James Bond film or maybe a clever way for an arms dealer to conduct business. But the truth is that lots of guys use offshore accounts for a variety of reasons. It may sound sexy to talk about an offshore account, but for the most part, banking offshore is about saving on tax dollars.

But if taxes aren’t a concern, liability may very well be — in which case offshore banking limits a creditor’s access to your funds (different country, different law). Finally, there are some guys who don’t need that Swiss bank account, but open it while on vacation because what better pickup line is there than dropping “my Swiss bank account” into the conversation?

If any of those reasons sound like they match your own motivations, here’s how you can open an offshore bank account.

It’s Friday, wouldn’t it be nice to pick up a nice girl at the bar tonight? Of course! (If you said no please exit COED immediately.)

Unless you’re name is Derek Jeter meeting a new woman can be a daunting task. Most guys have NO CLUE how to do it, so they crash and burn, again and again.

If you want to meet a new woman without running the risk of getting shot down you need a solid game plan. Use these 10 tips to start talking to women and getting numbers and dates in no time.

Time to get out there and have yourself a spring fling!

Note From the Editor: In New York City, anything can be delivered straight to your doorstep, from Chinese food to rare antique furniture – to the best weed on planet Earth. That’s right, instead of scoring a sh!tty dime bag from a dude in Washington Square Park, New Yorkers can just call a number and have a bud-toting bike messenger show up at their apartment with a buffet of different strains of weed – Purple Haze, Kush, Sour Diesel – they’ve got it all. We caught up with one of these drug delivery men who agreed to tell his tale here on COED. This is his story, from his perspective.

Believe it or not, riding your bike around New York City all the time is kind of dreamy.

Especially when it’s finally nice out. I don’t know if you live in the Northeast, but here in NYC we were punished by what seemed like month after month after month of greyness and cold and all-the-time wet with snow and ice and rain.

But now the sun is shining, and it’s nice – even though riding is like, maniacs of every race, creed and color coming at you from every direction; nearly every moment is like, what the f*ck, how am I not dead? (more…)

This day and age, it seems like damn near everybody smokes pot. And with weed quickly coming into the mainstream in a big way, that number is only going to go up. So whether you’ve been smoking for years or are just getting into this awesome herb, here is a quick guide to the different types of pot smokers you’ll run into during your toking travels.  (more…)

There’s a difference between “getting away from it all” and really getting away from it all. The former may be achieved by visiting a resort in Cuba or the Dominican Republic, while the latter requires a little more effort (and cash). To escape to a spot that even an exiled Napoleon could relate to, consider dropping some serious dough on a private island rental.

These tropical spots are full of first-class amenities, offer beautiful ocean views and, best of all, provide rest, relaxation and solitude. To make your choice easier, here are the 10 best private island rentals. Note: all rates are listed in U.S. dollars.

Check out the Top 10 Private Islands (You Can Actually Rent)