Today’s lesson kids comes from one of greatest teen-coming-of-age comedies of all time.  No, I’m not talking about ‘Bring it On’ or ‘Mean Girls’, but rather the 1979 classic ‘Meatballs‘ starring Bill Murray.   When life throws you a curve ball, you either give it a whack or watch it pass by. But hit or miss, sometimes you gotta say “It Just Doesn’t Matter”.

With The Twatlight Gaga: New Poon coming out this weekend, I can’t help but feel more than a little peeved at how much attention vampires are receiving. More specifically, it irks me to no end to see hordes and hordes upon hordes of women swoon, seizure, and pass out over the mere mention of a vampire. No matter what the flick or show, chicks be lovin’ dem bloodsuckers. Well, I say they’re c*cksuckers! The increase in popularity signals a decrease in machismo and respect for the male vampire. Now, let me COUNT the ways in which the vampire SUCKS:

Vampires completely contradict everything I’ve ever striven for. They don’t have money, they don’t workout, they act effeminate most of the time, they slink around and sneak up on you and act all depressed. If you did any of this in real life, you’d be picked up by the cops on charges of third degree loitering and second degree creepery. So, why do girls get all orgasm-y when a vampire swoops in through the window? Is it because they’re outcasts? If that’s the case, then why aren’t Cameron Frye and Crispin Glover swimming in vagina? (more…)

Here at COED, we like nothing more than finding a new super-hottie to tout on the Site. So when we received these pictures of Transformers’ (other) hottie, Rachael Taylor, we were downright giddy. Hailing from sunny Sydney, Australia, the 25-year-old beauty will be starring in the upcoming indi-licious romantic comedy, Splinterheads, which hits theaters this Friday.

To get you excited, here are some exclusive bikini candids from the set! Now, don’t say we’ve never done anything nice for you.

We’re past this whole “Was the Balloon Boys story a hoax” nonsense. Obviously, it’s all bullsh*t. And if you think it might not be bullsh*t, all you have to do is watch this video of the father releasing the g*ddamn balloon to know that it’s a hoax.

Now that we have that resolved, let’s move on to bigger things: Who’s going to play who in inevitable  upcoming Hollywood biopic, “Balloon Boy?” The roll of Falcon is anyone’s guess. Probably Haley Joel Osmond, or whatever.  (more…)

Seth Rogan’s new movie Observe and Report is out on DVD and Blu-Ray!!

Bi-polar mall security guard Ronnie Barnhardt is called into action to stop a flasher from turning shopper’s paradise into his personal peep show. But when Barnhardt can’t bring the culprit to justice, a surly police detective, is recruited to close the case.

The movie is quite funny and if anything you should pick up the DVD to see Anna Faris… she is a serious smokeshow!

ATTENTION TWITTER UNIVERSE: We’re giving away a Blu-Ray copy of Observe and Report to the 7th person who sends “Observe and Report on Blu-Ray” to @coedmagazine – Ready….GO!

Congratulations @brogan_wilson! You are the winner of Ben Foster’s sci-fi blaster from Pandorum which hits theaters today. This great news for you, bad news for any aliens that may be residing on your block.  Happy hunting.

Pandorum Trailer

Sci-fi space thriller, “Pandorum,” starring Dennis Quaid and Ben Foster, follows two astronauts who awaken on a seemingly abandoned spacecraft. But unfortunately for them, they’re not alone. Luckily for us, that means lots of badass alien killing! And to help promote the film, which opens Friday, Sept. 25, they’ve given us a prop gun actually used in the movie to giveaway to you!  (more…)

It’s not hard for a bad movie to open on top of the weekend box office chart — a combination of heavy marketing, recognizable stars, and a simple concept pretty much assures it.  Every month, for example, a new bad horror movies comes and goes.  Remember The Messengers, Darkness Falls or Urban Legends: Final Cut?  They were all the #1 movie in America at one point.

Romantic comedies work the same way: Forces of Nature, Monster-in-Law, and Failure to Launch all topped the box office in their day.  And then there’s the awful kids’ movies that lazy parents pay for: Scooby Doo…Pokemon…The Pacifier…and the list goes on.

The thing about all these movies is that they’re passively bad.  Everybody already knew they would suck, and they’re quickly forgotten.  Sometimes, however, a movie opens at #1 that is really bad.  Offensively bad.  Beg-for-your-money-back, sign-of-the-impending-apocalypse bad.  Here are the 10 Worst Movies to Open at #1.  (more…)

Having created some of the most hilarious, babe-licious, original videos on the internet, we’ve come to expect good things from the guys at SecretSauce.tv. So when they sent us their series, “Hot Chicks in Black & White Flicks” we knew it’d be awesome. (Honestly, pretty much anything involving hot chicks in bikinis is right up our alley.) So, without further adieu, here are hot chicks in bikinis performing scenes from classic movies. Enjoy. (more…)

Transformers star and all-around on-screen goddess, Megan Fox has reportedly signed on to play Catwoman in the next Batman film, which is set to be released in 2011. File this under the “Please, please, please be true!” category. Fox follows in the footsteps of past hotties, Michelle Pfeiffer and Halle Berry. But something tells us she’s going to blow those two out of the water.

Despite the fact that many publications are reporting the deal, including The Sun, MTV UK and The Press Association, we’re still holding our breath until an official announcement is released. But that doesn’t mean we can’t fantasize about Megan Fox in a skin-tight PVC catsuit. (Not that we weren’t doing that already…)

UPDATE: Uh, nevermind… The Sun, which originally reported the “rumor,” is full of sh*t.