Top 10 Pranks To Torture Your Friends

College will be back in session before you know it so what better way to get into the spirit than the top 10 practical jokes you can play on your buddies.  We’ve waded through the internet to bring you some truly inspirational moments of pranking. Some are classics, some you may have never heard of before, all are a slice of fried gold. Ahem anyway, without further ado.

10).  The Shaving Foam Hand

A classic to start off with, not complicated, no explanation is required, but requires skill to pull it off well.  This is one of those pranks you learn as a kid that you never get tired of.  It can also be turned into a game with your other buddies, much like a game of Jenga or buckaroo, you can see how much foam you can get on your buddies’ face without them waking up.  And if you’re thinking what’s the big deal about shaving foam there are plenty of other products on the market you can use, chili oil anyone?(Do not do the chili oil, it’s like mace!).

Pros: Knowing that you are more than willing to fu*k with him in his sleep, your friend may never have a decent nights sleep again.
Cons: This is a gateway prank which will lead to tea bagging, and while tea bagging is the biggest violation you could perform on a friend’s body, it’s just wrong, funny, but wrong!

9).  Dead Thing In The Cereal

Another classic, it’s great as a revenge prank.  Everyone has that really annoying friend that eats really loudly, every bite worse than the last, the box of Rice Krispies  never ending, Snap Crackle and motherfu*king Pop!  Now in the video below they apparently used a real dead bird, but fortunately with advances in technology fake dead animals can look pretty realistic these days, and at reasonable prices too.  Stick one of those bad boys in your friend’s cereal box and wait for the chump to pour himself a bowl, after all breakfast is the most important meal of the day.

Pros: He may throw up.
Cons: You may throw up.

8). The Windows Start-Up

It’s the 21st century, and since everything these days involves a computer somewhere, it’s only fitting to have a prank involving one.  This little beauty requires the changing of the windows start up sounds to make them sound more like a scene from Die Hard,   hide in the nearest convenient dark place and wait for the magic.  This is a great way of judging how much of a man your friend is based on how much of a little bitch he acts like when the shows starts (make sure the volume is turned up all the way to 11).

Pros: Your friend may actually sh*t himself.
Cons: If you only know how to get to the porn on your computer, could you really be bothered reading the Wiki page to figure out how to change the sounds?

7). The Reverse Ikea

Your friend’s just come home from work, he’s beat after working late trying to get that report done for tomorrow’s deadline, the bags are heavy under his eyes, he goes straight to his bedroom, doesn’t even take his clothes off, all he wants to do is sleep, he collapses on to his bed and then BOOM!  The bed collapses, in your face sucka, IN YOUR FACE!  You’ve spent the day unscrewing his bed.  Need I say anymore?

Pros: Extra comedy can be got from seeing your friend’s face drop when you refuse to help him put the bed back together.
Cons: Only works on slot beds.  I don’t know what a screwdriver is.

6). Coke Bomb

I was too busy in science class drawing dicks on the diagrams of the female anatomy in my biology book(ah the glory days before Brazilians) to pay attention to my teacher, which is a damn shame because I would’ve learned this doozie a lot earlier than I did.  Coke and Mentos, that’s all it is, stick the Mentos in the coke, stick the coke in the fridge Bob’s your uncle!  Plus it’s a scientific experiment so I’m pretty sure you can get a grant from the Government for it.

Pros: Once it’s starts there’s no way to stop it.
Cons: Volatile elements may back fire on you.

5).  Mr. Pee-Pee Pants

Who figured this one out?  Who?!  Well whoever it was deserves a Nobel Prize, it’s just genius.  Setting your friend back 20 years and thousands of dollars in Psychiatrists’ bills earns this one a place on the top ten.  Now we all know how to do it, but I’m just gonna give a bit of advice from my experience’s using it -  always use mildly warm water, cold water just tends to wake them up, and if they start to get restless when you’re putting the hand in sing them a lullaby, Twinkle Twinkle Little Star seems to work.

Pros: Being able to call your friend a different urine related nickname everyday.
Cons: May piss on your copy of FHM if he is sleeping on the couch, choose your spots wisely.

4). Butter Side Up

This is so good I wish I thought of it.  Is your friend always coming home really late really drunk waking you up?  Or is your friend always getting up in the morning going to work making lots of noise while you’re trying to sleep of a hangover?  Well then this is the prank for you.  Wait until they’re out of the house and then get a tub of butter and cover the tiles or hardwood floor, wait for them to come home and fall on their hole!  Just don’t forget where you’ve spread it or the pranker will become the prankee.

Pros: After they fall, you can in and slide like a pro (preferably to the strains of Bob Segar’s ‘old time rock and roll’).
Cons: You may have to look after said victim if he falls and breaks his ass.

3). The Mystery Mouse

Oh technology, I love it so!  Destined to be a future classic this represents a different type of prank, if done correctly this can be a slow burner, a little in-joke between you and your pals at the expense of the victim.  We pretty much leave our computers on 24/7 these days so there is a huge window of opportunity for this one.  Get one of those Bluetooth of infrared computer mouses(you may need to prepare by installing the mouse on his computer), sneak into your friends room and hook it up to their computer while they have a snooze.  Then go back out of the room leaving a crack in the door, just enough to see his screen.  Give it a minute or two to make sure you’ve not startled him, then the fun begins.  You can pretty much do anything, turn iTunes on, the media player delete important work files anything!

Pros: If he doesn’t find out it can lead to days/weeks/months/years of psychological torture on your pal.
Cons: He becomes so paranoid he starts wearing a tinfoil hat.  No one wants to be friends with that guy.

2). The Wall

This one is really a group activity, but what’s better than a bit of male bonding while screwing over one of your other friends (I never liked Roy anyway).  While your friends is away on business, or back home seeing the folks, or on his honeymoon, sneak into his room and construct a plaster wall right in his doorway.  You may need to find someone who actually knows what he’s doing or this can end in disaster.  Bonus points awarded for wallpapering or hanging a picture on the wall(preferably a framed photo of you and your buddies actually constructing the wall).

Pros: Even at your funeral your buddies will be reminiscing over this prank.
Cons: if I wanted to put so much effort into something I’d get a job.

1). Antiquing

We started with a classic, and finish with a classic.  I love this one so much, it takes no thought whatsoever, and can be done on a whim, by yourself or with friends, it really is the perfect prank.  I’m sure everyone in the world knows what this – wait until your friend is asleep then cover his face in flour.  For me there are to different ways of doing this, there’s the shotgun style blast in the face or the slow pour of an entire bag, and if it’s you and your friends you can literally run an antique train on the victim.  Every guy should’ve pulled this one at least once, in fact go into any man’s kitchen and you’ll find a bag of flour for just such occasion (it’s sure a shit ain’t there for baking!).  I’m not gonna even bother giving this one pros and cons because it’s not necessary, it really is the daddy of all pranks.

And there you have it the top ten pranks to pull on your friends, but before I go a big thanks you to all those people who have taken the time out of their busy lives to pull these modern works art, you are the real heroes!

10 Video Games That You Can’t Quit

It’s pretty safe to say that anyone under the age of 40 has had their lives completely shaped by video games.  I still remember getting the ‘Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles’ game on Christmas morning for my first game system, the Commadore 64.  SNES, N64, Gameboy, Gamecube,  Psone, PS2, PS3, XBOX, X360,  they’re all important milestones in my life — and I’d hate to think how many hours I’ve clocked in on these.

And that’s the thing, how many times have you been playing a game without realizing you’ve clocked in 6,7,8 hours playing? Before you know it, the entire weekend is over and you’ve managed to spend it all sitting in the same spot on the couch. The worst part is that they’re not even all good games — or at least the kinda games you want people to know you’re playing.

Here’s our definitive list of the most addictive video games in the entire world.  They’re the only thing, besides your daily dose of crack, that keep you coming back for more, more, more!

10).  Worldwide Soccer Manager Series

I have lost days, weeks, months, years, girlfriends to this game!  I know that at first, it looks like nothing. But taking your team to the top and dominating everything around you is like a drug, especially when you start in the lower leagues and work your way up with one team. And don’t even get me started on how exhilarating it is when you bring in older stars to help your team win a promotion.

9). Mortal Kombat 2

This game was the SNES for me, over Mario, over Zelda.  I clocked in more hours on this than anything else at the time and it is without a doubt better than Street Fighter 2. And what more could you want as a kid than blood, blood, and more blood? The fatalities were immensely over the top and nothing was better than taking your opponent down to funky town with one of them.  My record stood amongst my pals for several years because  I could not be defeated — though I was never able to defeat Shao Khan. Boo.

8). The Movies

Similar in style to the ‘Theme’ series, this game is a definite must for anyone who has ever been even remotely interested in the film industry.  You build up an Empire by starting with nothing.  At first your only concern is getting movie after movie out there, but soon you’ll want to make bigger more elaborate movies, win awards,  and be the top company in the industry!  And there’s the catch, as you start out the pace is quite slow, there’s not many sets, movies are short, they don’t take that long to make, but before long you’ll be dealing with petulant stars and their entourages, massive sets breaking down slowing production, no movies coming out, and your ranking going down.

7).  Theme Park/Theme Hospital

A gloriously simple games for those with OCD, in which you plan out your amusement park or hospital to the smallest detail. The fact that you can run everything in your park, from how much salt you can put on the fires to how much ice you put in the coke makes it so incredibly addicting (tip: put a fries stand next to a drinks stand, put loads of salt on your fires, and watch your profits soar as the kids all want a drink!) Though there have been newer games like ‘Theme Park World’ and ‘Theme Park Inc’ the original is still the best for me.  Just one question, why do janitors suck so much in the game?

6). Zelda:  The Oscarina Of Time

Buying this game is one of the clearest memories of my childhood. I was almost in tears as the game that I had pre-ordered wasn’t held (sons of bitches). But after running around to tons of different stores, I finally got it. While the story of this game sucks you in, there’s a little side game that had myself, my family my friends, my dog absolutely hooked – FISHING! Hours were spent trying to get the biggest fish, waiting patiently for the line to snap.  Even after I completed the main game, I  still went back to play the fishing.

5).  NBA JAM

HE’S…ON…FIRE!!  Classic arcade sports game with great moves and an even better announcer — it’s still not boring even after all the years.  It’s such a simple game, 2 on 2 basketball with simple controls. But there was a little bit of tactic to it, do you pick a good 3 point man and a dunker?  Or go for someone with speed?  My favorite pair were always Utah Jazz’s John Stockton and ‘The Mailman’ Karl Malone, they were the perfect balance.

4).  Command And Conquer Red Alert series/Generals

Yes Dune was the godfather of the RTS game, but C&C is to Dune as what Doom is to Wolfenstein (that makes sense, I think!).  I have literally spent hours at a time in the Skirmish mode in this game playing against the computer, building huge bases, fending off attack after attack until your ready to decimate everything around you.  I was never one for going on the offensive, instead I liked them to come to me.  It’s a risky tactic initially, but once you have you defenses set up it’s absolutely glorious.

3). Fallout 3

It’s been over a year since dear ol’ Kris Kringle delivered it and has been a staple of my gaming ever since (even though the end of the storyline game is pretty lame).There’s just so much to do and find in the game.  It’s impossible to stop until you’ve completed every quest and found every secret — there’s an alien pistol out there somewhere and you’re gonna find it even if you have to cover every square inch of the land!

2).  Civilization IV

Sid Meier you little genius, who wouldn’t want to run their own land?! In order to succeed one has to balance a military regime against evolving your civilization. Do I need another tank or should I develop Broadway?  Wars are balanced on a knife’s edge, alliances are formed, and you have to think carefully whether or not to threaten a country. I love the space race in this game — carefully planning each move as I attempt to take over some bastard’s land.  Hey, they started it!

1). GTA: Vice City

Why this game at number one?  Simply because it is the most unbelievably bad ass game around!  There are just so many perfect elements to this game, the cars, the city with the Miami Vice vibe, and the soundtrack. If you need to relax, just close the curtains, but on your best Don Johnson suit, stick this game in, pick your best ride, tune in to ‘Pressing issues with Maurice Chazev’, tear it up and you’re instantly too cool!

10 Celebrities Who Would Kick Your Ass At Beer Pong

Ah Beer Pong, the king of sports!  Requiring skill, luck and downright awesomeness, it is more manly than football, MMA and Wii Sports combined.  Sure it only takes a minute to learn but a lifetime to master(I‘m still waiting for my call up to the big leagues).  Issue a challenge for a game and who knows who you’ll end up playing, the football team, the math team, the A-team.  That’s right, celebrities play beer pong too, and here’s a list of famous booze hounds you don’t wanna be going toe to toe with.

10). Danny DeVito

Ten years ago I wouldn’t have given the little guy a look in, but since becoming a regular cast member on ‘It’s always sunny in Philadelphia’ double D has become something of a renaissance man and someone to be feared on the beer pong circuit.  Rumoured to have a wicked looping shot (a rumour started by me, just now) laugh at him at your peril.  In the past 3 years I have seen the man known as DeVito drunk more times than sober, I guess that’s what happens when your married to Carla Tortelli(that’s a bit cruel, in real life Rhea Pearlman’s a sweetheart!).  One can only describe him as the John Stockton of the beer pong world.

9).  Mel Gibson

Oh Melanie, you make it so easy,  no matter what you do from now on you will always be known for that moment, and what better time to bring it up than when his new movie is close to release.  All kidding aside, Mel has all the right attributes to kick your ass at beer pong.  For a start he grew up in Australia, where beer is practically a religion, in fact I’m pretty sure babies are breastfed on Fosters in Oz(that’s a lie, no one drinks Fosters down there because it takes like watery piss, Crocodile Dundee, you lied to us!).  Secondly, if his movies have taught us anything, Mel isn’t a quitter, and in this writer’s humble opinion, Mel coming back for a game of beer pong would be like Jack Nickalus playing the masters, LT in the Superbowl or Ali in the heavyweight title fight.  Heroes never die, and in the immortal words over Martin Riggs, he’s ‘not too old for this sh*t’.  Finally, this guy was Mad Max, Payback,  he plays for keeps!

Two ladies of questionable morals Mel won during his last game of beer pong

8). Tara Reid

The token chick on my top ten, except there’s nothing token about this lil lady.  Who would’ve thought when we saw ‘American Pie’ all those years ago that Miss Reid would turn out to be the trashy one?  Not me that’s for sure(Shannon Elizabeth well done for keeping most of your dignity).  No stranger to a kegger, or pretty much anywhere there‘s an open bottle of alcohol, she is bound to know her way around a beer pong table(amongst other things, zing!).  Even if you do come close to beating her, Reid has one big trick up her sleeve, her complete and utter lack of shame. Imagine trying to concentrate if she starts showing you the goods, whether you‘re completely disgusted by the numerous surgeries, or have a first class ticket to bonersville, it will put you off.  Whatever it takes Miss Reid, whatever it takes.

7).  Charlie Sheen

Another one on the comeback trail, star of reality TV series ‘Two and a half men’ and beer pong MVP 1989-1996, Sheen is a legend who retired,  only to magically reappear over the Christmas period(this is me not touching that subject with a barge pole).  Sheen’s stellar heritage(he‘s got irish in the blood), accompanied with his ‘been there, done that’ life gurantee him greatness when it comes to the pong.  So the next time you’re at a party and you hear ‘oh shit it’s Sheen!’ run, run hard and run fast.  That or threaten to tell his dad.(Pappa Sheen will take the belt to him, just ask Emilio Estevez)

 

6). Gary Busey

The Hannibal Lecter of the beer pong.  He’s kept in a cage surrounded by armed guards 24-7 until somebody at a party(usually by a drunk freshman) issues these fatal words ‘I could beat Gary Busey at beer pong’.  He wheeled to the table, and only when everyone else is clear of the room he’s released from his restraints, the it’s just you and Busey baby.  What happens next is a display of pure insanity mixed with brilliance, quoting you Shakespeare and Edgar Allen Poe while you get pwned, surgically taking apart every bit of your game until you’re a jibbering mess on the floor.  Just another victim to the Busey.

5). John Daly

Long John Daly, this guy is the Butterbean of beer pong, he will just pound you into submission.  For god sake just look at the guy, that body is the definition of a professional athlete.  Let’s face it, Daly only took up golf because he needed something to do in between games of beer pong and its was the closest thing he could get to it.  He’s the kinda guy who will p*ss in your mouth when you pass out after losing a game to him so the next morning when you wake up you know you have been Daly-nated(Trademark pending).

4). Scott Hall

‘The Bad Guy’ Razor Ramon, who knew that when he was actually playing the bad guy it was an improvement on his real life personality.  We’ve seen what he does to people when he’s drunk and it‘s not pretty, just watch any of his wrestling matches, ever.  Can you imagine the fear while standing waiting for your next opponent at the beer pong table and the music hits, the crowd goes wild when Hall comes out, wearing his plum smugglers and waistcoat with gold draped round his neck?  I’d drop a deuce right then and there!  If this guy can wrestle drunk, he can sure as hell play beer pong drunk, and just if by luck you are about to beat him, outta nowhere comes Kevin Nash and smacks you upside the head with a chair.  Or how about this, your playing a doubles match and your partner screws you over and joins Hall‘s team.  Yeah somebody get me the number for the WWE, I have some ideas I need to run past them.

3). Alex Trebek

Oh sure, you look at this picture and you’re bound to think you could take this square down to funkytown, but as momma always said, never judge a book by it’s cover.  Trebek will simply mind f*ck you into submission.  Before you know it, that friendly game of beer pong has turned into a full out general knowledge quiz aimed directly at you.  Imagine it:  taking your turn while everyone is watching you, sweat dripping from your brow, swaying back and forth trying to regain composure, Trebek’s eyeballing the sh*t out out of you, his tie wrapped round his head like Rambo, he mouths the words ’punk ass b*itch’, and then just at the point you are about to let the ball go he says  ‘If this species of hybrid’s parents were reversed, you’d get a hinny’.  GAME OVER MAN, GAME OVER!  Goddamn you Trebek.

2). Keifer Sutherland

If Jack Bauer puts his hand up when you ask ‘does anyone want a game of beer pong’ you may as well just go home and go to bed because if you don’t, you are entering a world of pain, plain and simple.  This guy can go all day and all night, literally!  Oh yeah, you can laugh, you can have some fun when you play, but you won’t see him smiling.  Oh no, this is far more than a game to Captain America, this is real life damnit!  Rumor has it that the Chinese kidnapped Sutherland because he was just too damn good at beer pong, that or it was part of a storyline for the TV series 24, if you want to believe FOX that is.  If it was me, I’d rather be tortured than play him in a game of beer pong, and god help anyone who says anything un-American while playing him.

1). The 43rd President of the United States George W. Bush

That’s right, the king swinging d*ck of beer pong is none other than one of the good ol’ boys.  This man’s entire life has been built around beer and the pursuit of good times.  I’m pretty sure he turned the Roosevelt room into a party palace for the entire two terms of his presidency, complete with his own beer pong table with the Presidential seal on it.  Dub-ya will kick your ass, taunt you all game long, flip you the bird, French your girl finger your dog and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it, because if you so much as give him a dirty look his secret service agents will F you right in the A.  It could be worse though, number 2 on my list could be waiting to play the winner, try saying something to W. then, you’ll have a car battery attached to your nuts quicker than you can say democracy!

So there you have it, a complete run down of the celebrities who could kick your ass at beer pong, you have been warned!

5 Celebrity Cuties Currently Enrolled In College

All you lucky young men in college reading this right now may not realize that you have a famous feisty Fraulein in your midst’s , maybe in your class, maybe even in your dorms! Now I was intending to make this list a top ten, but unfortunately the current crop of celebs aren’t exactly the learned scholars, they’re more the drunken sluts, bless them!  So what you have here is the top 5, the best of the best, creme de la creme, beauty and brains.

5). Lily Cole
Cambridge University – England

Sure sometimes she may look like a alien on a bad day but tell me you would crawl naked over broken glass to get a piece of her.  And yes, you may have to leave the good ol’ USA behind and move to England to get a chance with her but here’s a couple of good reasons why that’s a good idea.

1).  University is a lot cheaper in the UK
2). The legal age to drink alcohol is 18
3).  It is pretty easy to go out for a night, get steamy drunk, and still have change from a £10 note.

Flaming red hair and pale skin and blue eyes are always a plus for me and since this chick is 5”10 and worth about £11million my approach would be to walk straight up to her, look her dead in the chest, and say ‘marry me’.

4). Taylor Swift
University of Kansas

Ok, so technically she doesn’t go to University, but she has been spotted there, in class, visiting one of her friends, and when your that famous and you don‘t have to do squat but you willingly sit in a lecture theater for a few hours, that’s good enough for me.  This sweet southern belle hits all the right notes, which the exception  being Jonas brother A, or B, or C’s seconds, and I hate those goddamn Jonas brothers.

So how would I go about scoring with Swift?  Hmmm, grow a mullet, get a little bit pumped, stick on a wife beater and learn how to line dance.  With me so far? Good!   Then set up a line dancing party in your dorm(you guys have those, right?) bust a few symmetrical moves and before know it she’ll be serenading you to sleep.

3). Carrie Prejean
San Diego Christian College

I don’t know much about her, except she’s hot, and that’s all I really need to know.  A quick search round the interweb tells me she came runner up in the Miss USA contest 2009 and that she has a sex tape so my conclusions – JACKPOT!!

I know you might have to put with her constantly telling you her views on religion, but with an ass like that she can read the bible to me start to finish in latin and I‘ll still be smiling!  Plus she still may have her Catholic School girls uniform…….sorry, was just thinking about that, ahem.

2). Allison Stokke
University of California

You may not have heard of her…yet, but this woman makes me lost for words, and being a writer that leaves me slightly up the creek without a paddle.  Somewhat of a star since some genius posted pics of her at a track meet on the net(a tip of the hat to you sir) Stokke is a fit, dedicated pole vaulter(snarf snarf) and global warningly hot, I would give my right arm to even attend the same college as her, in fact I even put that down on my application form(I’m still waiting to hear back, fingers crossed!)

She is no doubt a future star of the Olympics, magazines and on the wish list of countless TV producers  so you’re only chance with her is telling her you’re making it to the Olympics, and winning gold, better renew that gym membership fellas!

1). Emma Watson
Brown University

Oh Miss Watson how we’ve watched you bloom into a bona fide  HOTTIE.  Remember back when Lindsay Lohan did that SNL sketch about Harry Potter and we all hope that Emma Watson would turn out like her?  Well now it’s vice-versa – Lohan clean you‘re goddamn act up young lady!   Emma Watson has an elegant, natural beauty – she looks just as good with no make up on as she does plastered in the stuff, in scruffy casual clothes as she does wearing the latest fashions she’s so hot she put other hotties to shame!  In fact my one complaint, and it’s not really a complaint it’s more a concern, is that she’s just a bit to skinny.  Miss Watson if you’re reading have a ham sandwich with some cheese or something, go on, live a little!

And the kick in the teeth, you yanks have got your mitts on here, that’s right she’s studying in the U.S. of lucky bastard A!  As Robert Palmer once sang, some guys have all the luck.  Men of America, do not waste this opportunity!

Now Enjoy…Top 5 Hottest Pic Links On The Web!