Sarah Silverman is Cheating on Jimmy Kimmel With… Matt Damon?

Jimmy Kimmel is known to constantly apologize to Matt Damon for always running out of time when he’s scheduled to appear as a guest on Jimmy Kimmel Live. This particular gag has been running for years, leading up to Damon looking for revenge. So what better way to get your “karmic” desserts than to sleep with your sworn enemies’ wife and have her write a song about the dirty deed?

Needless to say, that’s exactly what went down: Matt Damon and Sarah Silverman hooked up, and they want to share their experience with Jimmy and the world.

Sarah Silverman’s style of comedy will usually split any room into two parties, one in favor of her lewd remarks, one not so impressed – but not this time!

Kudos to Matt Damon for being such a good sport, and for having some sweet dance moves.

Let Ledger Rest

Even reporting on this makes me sick: a shocking video of Heath Ledger snorting cocaine at a party has surfaced (read: Entertainment Tonight bought it for $200,000).

The video, set to air on ET tonight, has since been pulled, out of respect for Ledger’s family.

I’m sure ET was being respectful when they bought the footage in the first place.

The hullabaloo surrounding Legder’s death is spinning out of control. Drugs, of course, were the dealbreaker in his demise; that much we know. But unearthing an old video of him indulging in the drug of denial doesn’t reveal anything new or relevant to anybody. It does, however, prove the entire affair is just a CASH-IN FOR BOTTOM-FEEDING TABLOID NAZIS.

There’s no sympathy for the dead in the land of “top story” blogs and “exclusive photo” paps. Hell, I’m guilty as charged as well – I’m letting this bother me enough to blog about it.

Exploiting the death of Ledger through “final pictures,” “exclusive interviews” and “shocking videos” is disgusting. I follow suit in reporting this because, well, you want to read about it. It’s “news,” right?

Here’s an idea, bloggers and readers: go outside. Do something relevant. Get the f** away from the computer for a moment and stop obsessing over celebrities.

Qtrax: 25 Million Free and Legal Music Downloads, Zero Major Label Love

If you can’t beat them, (reluctantly) join them – or don’t.

New P2P website Qtrax was scheduled to launch this morning with support from the four major labels – Universal Music Group, Sony-BMG Music, Warner Music Group, and EMI Group – but alas, they all dropped out last minute. One can guess the reason had something to do with not being super profitable, or maybe they’re all just being the man that wants to keep the people down.

While similar P2P sites have been around forever (with varying results), Qtrax is unique to an extent. The network exclusively relies on advertising that comes with their software for profit. (According to Qtrax the ads are not AdWare or SpyWare – how nice of them!) If you can live with a few annoying pop-ups and banners here and there, you’ll be treated to over 25 million downloadable songs for free – and 100% legal to boot. No shady subscriptions, no major problems.

Well, that was until the majors dropped out. Read more

DGA Cuts a Deal; WGA Strike to Be Resolved Next?

Variety has reported that the DGA (Directors Guild of America) has struck a three-year deal with the AMPTP (Alliance of Motion Picture of Motion Picture & Television Producers). The agreement will boost the residual rate of TV and film Internet downloads for Directors.

From Variety:

The DGA, which will send the pact to members for ratifications after its Jan. 26 board meeting, highlighted a trio of new-media gains:

Establishing DGA jurisdiction over programs produced for distribution on the Internet

Boosting the residuals formula for paid Internet downloads (electronic sell-through) by double the current rate

Establishing residual rates for ad-supported streaming and use of clips on the Internet

Call me crazy, but isn’t that deal essentially what the WGA wants? Read more

MySpace Safety Precautions: a Lost Cause?

MySpace, there you go again, harming our poor, young, impressionable youth with your incessant spamming (thanks for the ads!) and providing an oasis for rapists and murderers.

The idea of a social networking website has its merits – socializing and, uh, networking – but when do the harmless aspects of sites like MySpace, Facebook and Friendster (Friendster is still around, right?) become harmful? They become dangerous the moment sexual predators and homicidal maniacs are allowed access to these infinite portals of possibility, places where even the most studied social networker can get duped into life-threatening situations.

Stopping sickos is as easy as shutting these sites down, meaning not easy at all. Read more

Gyaru Girls are Hot

As always, Japanese girls are a decade ahead in trends – and a century ahead in attitude.

Gyaru Girls, an umbrella term used to describe girls who wear exaggerated versions of today’s trends, are hot – not because of their wild fashion sense (which is equal parts pretty and polarizing), but for not taking the fickle world of fashion too seriously.

Some Gyaru girls emulate the trashiest side of Paris Hilton while wearing tribal makeup similar to blackface (but without the racist overtone, mind you); others sport a look like Jem attending a Halloween party under the influence of PCP. They are far more dolled-up than most high-fashion mavens, yet seem to be more of a parody on the latest trends (and themselves), which is rad.

By the time young socialites don anything resembling these looks Gyaru girls will have moved on to a new stylistic approach. And isn’t that the point of fashion, to create new looks and think forward instead of backwards? Tell that to the 70s/80s/90s revivalists who consider rehashing fashion.

Gyaru Girl gallery after the jump. Read more

Top Model Elyse and Shins’ Keyboardist Marty Arrested for Domestic Violence

Whoa, this is unexpected.

America’s Next Top Model first season contestant Elyse Sewell (the hot/short-haired/least arrogant model) was involved in a domestic bout with her ex-boyfriend Marty Crandell, keyboardist of popular rock act The Shins.

While driving back home from Albuquerque to Portland Crandell got “sh*t faced” and roughed up Sewell in a Sacramento hotel. Amidst the scuffle Sewell was able exit the room, having hotel security contact the cops.

Upon the cops’ arrival, both were arrested on charges of domestic violence.

Sewell is currently out on bail while Crandell is still behind bars, awaiting a court date scheduled for this Tuesday, January 8. His bail is set at $25,000.

Not only is the situation ridiculous (how Sewell got charged for domestic violence is beyond me), but the warden and officers were royal d*cks for no reason whatsoever, according to the Top Model alumni. Read more

Being Anti-Apatow is Bad for Movie Biz

Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story has stalled at $14.2 million in the box office. While the movie wasn’t the pitch-perfect mock biopic I had hoped for, it was still highly enjoyable – and much better than most of its competition the past two weekends. So why the poor box office gross?

Can somebody explain to me why the dreadful P.S. I Love You (yes, I watched it…against my will) and The Water Horse: Legend of the Deep are both on pace to surpass Walk Hard in the following weeks? Is there an anti-Apatow campaign brewing?

Apatow isn’t the greatest working director/producer in movies by any stretch of the imagination, but there are plenty of studio hacks that deserve a legion of haters before him. If he is to be the standard of which comedy should be measured (standard, as in passing grade), we could do much worse.

And we do have much worse. Read more

No Scribes for Globes and Oscars

With the writer’s strike still going strong, the WGA has denied invitations to prepare material for the Golden Globes on January 13 and the Oscars in February. If both events didn’t seem crappy enough last time, they should be craptacular this time around.

(See what happens when you don’t get pros to make jokes for you?)

This situation raises a red flag for the Oscars in particular. With Jon Stewart returning as host it’s assumed that he will have to “wing it” without any writer’s assistance. Sure, Stewart can handle a fair share of improvisation – but an entire show? That’s a tall order. Read more

Infectious Behavior: You Gave Me What?

When you bring home a one-night stand from the local bar, or even step barefoot into a dorm shower, you may be putting yourself at great physical risk.

So we spoke to doctors from several universities about sexually transmitted infections, sexual dysfunction, steroids, pregnancies and even pubic-hair removal. It wasn’t pleasant.

I. You gave me what?
Most college-student health centers spend lots of time screening patients for sexually transmitted infections, or STIs. Doctors say the number-one reason students schedule appointments is for Pap tests or pelvic exams. Their results might come as a surprise: You’re definitely carrying something, and that something is called HPV. Dr. Davis Smith, medical director of the student health center at Wesleyan University, says: “For college-aged students moderately sexually active – about two to three partners a year – the likelihood of exposure to an HPV (Human Papil-lomavirus) is 100 percent.” Ouch!

Read more

Opie and Anthony’s E-Rock Takes the Cinnamon Challenge, Fails Miserably

This morning E-Rock from the “Opie and Anthony Show” almost died on air while taking part in the “Cinnamon Challenge!”

Check out the video below to find out what the Cinnamon Challenge is all about, and watch poor E-Rock cling on to his dear life.

Trying to Charm a Lady? Here Are Some Pointers…

In your mind you may be Rico Suave, but it never hurts to read over a few pointers on how to charm a lady. I’ll keep it short and sweet so you can get back to sleeping, studying, ripping that bong or doing whatever people do on a Friday morning.

Do Say:

“If you’re not having fun wherever we go just let me know, ok? It’s no big problem.”

In giving your date the option to opt out of a certain plan, you’re showing respect before she earns it. If you’re worried about her being an unhappy, bitchy control freak, you’ll find out soon enough – and you’ll know to never call her back.

“I know we were going to ____ next, but why don’t we just say screw it and go to _______ instead?”

Spontaneity is key in having a quality date. Don’t let the idea of what dating is supposed to be determine your night. At the very least open both of your nights to new places and possibilities. A boring date can be turned on its head with the right attitude and lack of inhibition. Read more

Predrag Drobnjak’s “Seattle Supersonics Seat Sale” Commericals

In a sport built on ego, Predrag Drobnjak is an NBA player who is unafraid to laugh at himself.

Here are a series of commercials where Drobnjak (and his cat Jinx) tell fans about upcoming Seattle Supersonics promotional events.

“Ouch I’m on fire, spray me with water!”

Two more Drobnjak commercials after the jump! Read more

Four More Men Admitting to Gay Encounters with Larry Craig Come Forward

Just when you thought the wide-stance scandal surrounding Sen. Larry Craig (R-Idaho) started to fade away, four new gay allegations pop up.

CBS news (via The Politico) reports that four men have admitted to gay encounters with the Idaho Senator. Some of these allegations stem back to the late 80s.

The Idaho Statesman, the original reporter of Larry Craig’s bathroom-stall scandal, are also the source of these new findings. Before Craig’s sexual preference became a global hot topic the newspaper had investigated rumors of his homosexual tendencies for several months; they unveiled the remaining information accumulated yesterday.

One man who stepped forward goes by the name of Mike Jones. Who is Mike Jones?

The Mike Jones in this case is not the self-promoting Houston rapper but a former prostitute who admitted to having sex with Reverend Ted Haggard in 2005. According to Jones, Craig paid for sex with him in either late 2004 or early 2005.

In typical Larry Craig fashion, he has denied all allegations.