Ask A Chick: Toe Sucking, Waiting Game For Virgins, Post-Date Texting

The girl I was hooking up with asked me to suck her toes. I was grossed out, but I did it to get her off. She loved it. If she asks, do I do it again? — Jimmy

Charlsie Says: If you like pleasing her and she asks, consider doing it again. If you absolutely hate it — don’t do it. Don’t put yourself in a jam by getting down and dirty with her toes if it’s not getting you hot and bothered at all.

My girlfriend is a virgin. How long do I wait for her to want to have sex? — James

Charlsie Says: You wait until she’s ready. If that doesn’t fit your timeframe and you have a problem with it, move on because you’ll end up doing you and her both a favor. Don’t rush it or you’ll ruin a good thing.

photo by PhotoAlto Agency Eric Audras

Am I desperate if I text a girl after our date to say that I had a good time? — Ben

Charlsie Says: If you send a short but sweet text after the date, it can go a long ways. I don’t think it makes you desperate, unless you send it the minute she closes the door. If you incessantly send texts or word anything like you’re too eager, it may come across a little weird, but if you keep it simple — you’ll be fine.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Condom Cache, Class Crush, Family Va(forni)cations

Is it weird if I keep condoms next to my bed? — Barry

Charlsie Says: No. Keep them wherever you want them, as long as you use them.

[Ed. note: You might want to put them in a drawer or a little box, though.]

This girl I like is in two of my classes, but she doesn’t notice me. How do I get her attention? — Damian

Charlsie Says: Try to sit next to her. If you have assigned seating or too many people in your way, I would recommend approaching her after class and saying hi. If you’re brave, you’ll ask her out — say you’d like to get to know her. If you’re a little hesitant, just say hi. Sometimes a smile and a little introduction goes a long way.

My girlfriend invited me to her parent’s condo for the weekend. We are sleeping in different rooms. Should I attempt to get it on with her or behave? — Joey

Charlsie Says: Sex when the parents are next door business is always risky but extremely fun. If you are terrified of her parents, I’d say keep it in your pants. If she’s game to have a good time, go right along and do what you two need to do. Have fun, but don’t get caught — there is no fun in that.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: LinkedIn Stalking, Family Ties, Best Pick-Up Line

The girl that dumped me keeps looking at my LinkedIn profile, what does this mean? — Jared

Charlsie says: This is weird. LinkedIn of all places to internet stalk someone is definitely an interesting choice. Unless you two work in the same industry and she’s stalking your job prospects, it sounds like she is just keeping tabs on you. If she’s doing this on LinkedIn, she’s probably doing it on Facebook — you just can’t see that she’s viewed your page. Is this awkward? Yes. Is it weird? No. What does it really mean? She’s human and we all are guilty of a little internet stalking from time to time, but she just chooses to do it in a weird way.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I say call her out on it. Why in the holy hell is she internet stalking you when SHE dumped YOU. Maybe she prematurely dumped and is regretting it / too proud to ask for you back.]

My sister hates my girlfriend, I feel like this will keep me from getting serious because family is important. Do I break up with her because of this or should I make something up? — Kaleb

Charlsie says: Don’t make something up. Tell her the truth. Family is everything to you, and because your sister feels the way she does, it has made you decide that you should take different paths. She’ll want to know why your sister hates her, so you should prepare to give her some kind of answer and don’t be shocked when she hits back with reasons why she hates your family but has decided to put up with them. This is one of those awful situations that sucks all the way around, but lying is pointless. Make it a clean, but honest break.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Don't just break it off. Address the issue with the girlfriend and the sister. Try to get them to talk to each other about it while you mediate. See if you can work it out. If it still sucks after your valiant attempt and no solution is in sight and you still family trumps girlfriend, then you split.]

What’s a good pick-up line? — Matt

Charlsie says: Say hi and introduce yourself. Short. Simple. Sweet. Leave the pick up lines at home.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: Or if you're feeling bold, try these, these, these, or these.]

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Online Dating 101, Apt Art, Dating Overkill

I’m considering online dating. How do I come across as a nice guy like I am in real life? — Zack

Charlsie Says: Don’t post creepy body shots of yourself. Stay away from any gun related images. And of course, don’t post pictures of yourself holding babies because that’s only going to make women think you’re a daddy. Be geniune, but not overstated. If you would be uncomfortable for your mom to read your profile, reconsider what you write. If you are approachable, the nice guy persona will come across.

What is something I need to have in my apartment to impress girls? — Michael

Charlsie Says: Some kind of art. Or just have a clean place — something that doesn’t scream of one night stands, beer, and dirty strippers always does the trick. What impresses a girl is going to vary, so just bet on being somewhat tidy and respectful and that’ll go a long way.

How many dates is too many dates in one week before I’m exclusive? I feel like it’s overkill with this girl I’m kinda into. — Bryant

Charlsie Says: If you feel like it’s overkill, it’s obviously overkill. Keep it to two to three nights, but that’s if you’re pretty much head over heels for her. If you’re not sure, do one night and then play it by ear when it comes to hanging out. Playing the dating game is stupid, in my book, but if you are looking to appear busy and not too needy of a girlfriend, keep it under two dates and just make sure the dates are quality. If you hang out more than that, make sure the dates are official and the other times are more lax. Balance is key before jumping into exclusivity.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Dating Textiquette, Official Couple Countdown, Dogsitting For B*tches

Should I ask a girl out on a date via text? — Robbie

Charlsie Says: It’s better if you ask her face to face, but these days, everything is all about technology — I don’t see why not. Go for it. Just don’t try to do that in the middle of a sext.

How many dates before I make it official? — Leo

Charlsie Says: This is completely up to you. Each and every relationship should go at its own pace. If you feel super passionate about someone, go full speed ahead. If you feel like you should take things slow, do that. However, I think if you’re going out all the time and it feels exclusive, just man up and have the talk so everyone is on the same page.

I hate my girlfriend’s dog, it’s so annoying but she wants me to babysit the damn thing while she goes out of town. Can I object or am I a jerk if I do? — Chris

Charlsie Says: If you don’t want to take care of the dog, tell her flat out. Just because you’re the boyfriend doesn’t make you the doggie babysitter. Of course you’ll look like a jerk, but it’s a lot better for you to just put your foot down over something like that because if you don’t — you could end playing doggy daddy all the time from this point on because your lovely lady may think you two bonded while she was out of town. Just say no and hold strong!

Tweet questions to Charlsie (@charlsieniemiec) or email them to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Sh*t-Faced First Date Dilemmas & Sharing the Soap

How much is too much to drink on a first date? — Hayes

Charlsie Says: Two drink maximum is my policy, which I think was engrained in me by the larger than life Bravo personality, Patti Stanger, from the show Millionaire Matchmaker. She says two drinks and be done, and considering it’s a date — not a party, I think that’s a good moderation. Don’t get sloppy drunk. Just don’t.

How much money should I spend on a first date? — Eric

Charlsie Says: That’s up to you. Don’t be cheap. Don’t be extravagant. Do be interesting and fun. Do have the ability to converse because if she’s not after your dollars, a connection is the most important part of a first date — and that’s usually established through conversation. If you want some ballpark figure, I’d say estimate whatever it costs to go to a dinner and a movie in your city, give or take a few bucks, and just go from there.

Why does my girlfriend use my soap in the shower? — Aidan

Charlsie Says: Because it’s probably the only soap in your shower? Either that or she likes to smell like you when you’re not rubbing bodies together. Just be glad she’s using soap!

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Sexiling, Email Dumping D-bag, Emailing With The Ex

IMAGE CREDIT: Photo by Pando Hall, Photographer’s Choice RF, Getty Images

If I break up with a girl via e-mail, does that make me a douchebag? — John

Charlsie Says: If you can’t say it to her face, it makes you seem like a baby. However, since everything is so technology driven, I actually don’t see the harm in saying “Hey, it’s not working out” through a respectful e-mail. If you’ve been with this girl for years or a good couple months, she deserves more than an e-mail (obviously), so save the e-mail break-up method for those relationships that just aren’t working out or going anywhere. Whatever you do though — don’t tweet, don’t text, and definitely don’t Facebook Status update your goodbye to the girl. Make it private and keep it simple.

Photo by Jupiterimages, Brand X Pictures, Getty Images

My ex-girlfriend and I e-mail each other on a regular basis. We’re cordial and the conversation goes well, this has me thinking that I’m into her again. Should I tell her even though we live quite a distance apart? — Tyler

Charlsie Says: First, you broke up for a reason. Second, having a decent conversation and being cordial to one another doesn’t mean you should spill the beans and try to initiate something. Be glad that you can be friendly with your ex, but really — leave it at that: just friends. And to end it, getting into a long distance relationship with someone who is your ex just doesn’t sound like the best reality for anyone. Seriously, enjoy the companionship via e-mail and be happy you have that old relationship in your past and the friendship you have now and just call it a day.

via FunnyChill.com

I’ll be a freshman in college this September and I’m worried about having privacy if I bring a girl back to my dorm. Do girls make a big deal about this? — Robert

Charlsie Says: Unless you bring back a girl who lives by herself off campus, she’ll completely understand your living situation — especially if she’s also a college student (as I assume she will be) living in a dorm with a roommate like you. College living is awesome, but it can be slightly annoying when it comes to bringing someone back to your room when a roomie might be around. Just set up some kind of system with your roommate, and things will work out just how you want them!

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Chicks In Dude’s Clothing, Sealing the Deal, No Love For Bloggers

Why does my girlfriend like wearing my clothes? — William

Charlsie Says: When a girl wears your clothes, it’s her little way of carrying you around with her. Whether it’s one of your old gym shirts or a fancy schmancy dress shirt, she’ll love it as much as she loves you because it’s just another extension of you that she literally can wear. And plus, a lot of the time, women just look way better in men’s clothes — so it’s fun to dress up a la boyfriend style.

I’m a guy. I blog. Will this get me laid? — Seth

Charlsie Says: Maybe. Probably not. The blogging world often feels like it’s dominated by women, especially on certain platforms, so I can understand why a man would think that if he’s in a sea of girls that maybe he can have real life hook-ups. However, even if you’re the hottest blogger man around, if your content comes across as overly confident, cocky, and in any way degrading to smart, respectful women — chances are, you won’t be getting laid by the girls that are actually a catch. If you’re actively using your blog as a way to get laid, girls will catch on and eventually, your time will run out.

So, instead of being the guy that blogs to bone, be the guy that blogs to blog and maybe gets lucky along the way.

[Ed Note: F*ck.]

I liked this girl during my sophomore year of college and we spent a lot of time hooking up, but we never were in a relationship. Junior year is starting, should I try to seal the deal by asking her out? I think we’d be decent together. — Art

Charlsie Says: Definitely ask her out. If you two have been hooking up and you think she’s interested in more, don’t keep your feelings to yourself. Initiate a relationship. And if it works, well, then there you go. It sounds like she’s been on your mind this summer, so there isn’t a better way to start your junior year than by letting her know how you feel. If she feels the same way — perfect! If she feels differently — at least you won’t be wasting your time. It’s a win-win for a new year!

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Comes Too Quick, Chicknames, Clash of the Movie Tastes

I orgasm too quickly in bed. How do I slow things down to please a woman more? — Johnathon

Charlsie Says: When it comes to foreplay, keep it slow. Get her aroused and keep her aroused, and that doesn’t mean 10 minutes of foreplay and then the wham-bam-thank you ma’am. Take your time. If you are afraid of crossing the finish line earlier than you’d like, use foreplay as a way to please her over and over again for a length of time that you have more control over.

If you feel like she’s still not satisfied and you reach climax during the heat of the moment, spice things up with a vibrating friend. Add it into the bedroom and when you’re finished, you can still pleasure your lady without worrying about getting the job done.

Photo by PNC, Lifesize © Getty Images

Why do girl’s nickname guys amongst their friends? — Jeremy

Charlsie Says: You can only date so many Matt’s and Andrew’s before things get confusing. You can only have so many people you’ve met or dated without resorting to nicknames. Plus, nicknames are fun and sometimes, they just happen.

Example, if you’re that guy at the party in a red shirt, you could be deemed “The guy in the red shirt,” which could be shortened to “Red shirt guy” over brunch one day. Most of the times, nicknames are completely harmless.

However, if you make a girl’s no-no list (you know, the list that no guy ever wants to be put on because if you’ve made it onto that list, there’s no use in trying to get off it), nicknames may be a little mean-spirited, but really … if you’re on that list, you probably deserve a less than flattering nickname anyways.

Photo by Leland Bobbe, Photonica © Getty Images

I like seeing actions and comedy movies with my girlfriend, but she prefers seeing more dramas. We like to go to the movies, but we never can find something we both want to see. Any suggestions on how to make it fair for both of us? — Thomas

Charlsie Says: Let her pick what you see next time. It doesn’t matter if it’s a chick flick, drama, or comedy — let her decide. And then the next time, you pick. Fair is fair and if you see what she wants, she should see what you want. Just split it 50/50. If you really hate seeing what she wants to see or she can’t sit through another super hero movie with you, just don’t go to the movies with each other. Go with your friends. It’s great to have things in common, but if you feel like trying to meet in the middle with something is more of a hassle, just stop.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Lay Some Skype, From DTF To DTR, Chicks Be Nailin’

Why do girls put so much emphasis on their nail polish? The entire internet blogging community is nothing but pictures of girls showing off their nail polish. What is the point of this? — Jeff

Charlsie Says: It’s just another form of accessorizing an outfit, and since so many new kinds of nail polish styles have come out (like those shattered, crackle colors) — nail polish has become as common place as changing your underwear. There really isn’t some overwhelming reason as to why girls are obsessed with showing off their nail polish — we just like the colors, the designs, and the way our nails look against our clothes.

I’ve been sexting and having sex via GChat video and Skype with this girl for two months now. We are friends and have been for two years. This is new for us and I’m sexually attracted to her. But we haven’t met up since this started, and I think this is weird because we live in the same area. How do I initiate meeting up with her to put our chats into action? — Matt

Charlsie Says: Sexting and digital getdowns (I’d like to thank *N Sync for that phrase) are fun, but if you aren’t going to really get it on and you live so close — it almost seems pointless to me. Have you initiated meeting with her or has she? If neither one of you have done this, but you spend time on Skype getting naked, I think there is probably some underlying issue as to why you haven’t met up yet — are you nervous about the physical action changing your relationship? Are you actually not into her even in the least, but you find the voyeuristic game of sexting and cyber sex to be a turn on?

Either initiate (simply by asking her) and plan to meet up or just call the whole thing off — unless you both 100% understand it is just a sexual relationship that revolves around logging on and getting off. Long distance relationships often rely on communication like this, but that makes sense. Being so close and not acting on it, well … it seems like a cop-out.

Photo by Andrew Rich © Getty Images

How do I ask a girl to be my girlfriend? We’ve dated for 2 months, but we haven’t had a discussion about being exclusive. It feels like we are, but I want the confirmation. — Cody

Charlsie Says: To seal the deal and make her your exclusive lady lover, you should probably have the DTR talk (determine the relationship). Tell her you want to be exclusive with her and all those things that you like so much about her. Ask her if she wants the same thing. If you both are on the same page, this conversation will go swimmingly and you’ll find yourself boyfriend and girlfriend officially.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: More Money, More Sex, More Partners

My girlfriend makes more than me. This bothers me because we have the same degree. Do I tell her this? — Brent

Charlsie Says: Why would you tell her this? Relationships shouldn’t be a competition, and if you bring this up, consider yourself in one and monetarily, it sounds like she is going to win first place. By bringing this up, you’ll only make yourself more frustrated by having a conversation that is just going to make you feel more insecure about your wage difference.

Really though, she makes more than you — so what? Does that fact change how you feel about her? If you want a conversation that won’t go anywhere, bring it up. If you want to just keep working and climbing the corporate ladder, alongside your girlfriend, keep quiet and do what you need to do to get on the level you want to be professionally.

I want to have sex more than twice a week, but it feels like my girlfriend and I never do it more than that. How do I fix this? — Chris

Charlsie Says: Initiate, initiate, initiate. What gets you two going when you do have sex? Do more of that and do it all the time. Don’t make it some chore like “Oh I guess it’s Thursday, we should have sex.” Make a game out of it. Spice it up. Play with toys. Do something that drives your girlfriend absolutely wild (she’ll probably return the favor). Try something new. Just dig in and get down. Even if your schedule is too busy (or so it seems), make time. It’ll be worth it.

How many sex partners is too many for a guy? — Robbie

Charlsie Says: If you’re smart, the number game won’t be something that you bring up when you date someone because at the end of the day, a number is just that — a number. Whether it’s 3 or 30, your partner probably won’t care as long as you are safe — this means wearing condoms, getting tested for STDS/STIs, and being responsible with each and every partner, every time.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Party Girl Gone Wild, Sizing Up The Competition, ‘Next Day’ Dates

The girl I’m dating drinks too much when we go out. I kind of hate it. How do I get her to stop? — Justin

Charlsie Says: Ok, if she’s drinking too much every time you go out and you’re worried about her, she could have a drinking problem. Before you accuse her of going Lindsay Lohan on you, consider where she does this at. Is this happening in night clubs only? If so, maybe she lets loose a little too much when she goes out to such venues. But, on the other hand, if this is happening in restaurants, over at your friend’s house, and when she is anywhere a bottle of booze might be — you have a problem. well, actually, she has a problem and it’s going to become your problem if you continue to put up with it.

You can’t get her to stop. You can tell her it bothers you or you want to enjoy the night sober, but it’s up to her to not over indulge. If she keeps doing it — walk away because you’re not going to change her partying ways.

My girlfriend and I haven’t had sex yet, but she’s made comments about the size of other guys. I don’t think I can live up to some of them. Should I be worried that I can’t please her? — Aeric

Charlsie Says: If you have absolutely no skills in the bedroom, then yes — worry. But if you are an attentive and interested lover, don’t worry about a thing. Everybody is obviously a different size, and just because she may have had bigger doesn’t mean you can’t please her. Be confident and ask her what you want and you’ll be golden.

Every time I go out and dance with girls or spend all night making out with them, I’ll try to initiate the next day with a date or something. I get rejected. What gives? — Michael C.

Charlsie Says: Just because a girl dances and makes out with you at a bar doesn’t mean she wants to be your girlfriend. She could just be looking for a good time. If she doesn’t respond, don’t take it personally. Girls like easy, one night flings, too and we’re not always on the prowl for a man to call our boyfriend.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Relationsh*ts, Rich B*tches, Premature Introductions

I hate my girlfriend — Chris

Charlsie Says: This isn’t a question, but I decided to feature it anyway because I get these messages fairly often over in the Ask A Chick inbox.

Dudes, why are you with someone who makes you so annoyed or upset that you write in just to say you “hate” her? End it. Walk away. Say goodbye. Move on already. There is no need to stay with someone if you feel that strongly about them in a “Oh my gosh, I can’t stand you” kinda way. You’re wasting her time, but most of all — you’re wasting your own. Give it up!

I’ve been dating a girl for 2 months, and I really like her, but she wants me to meet her family already. Is this too soon? — Sam

Charlsie Says: Meeting the parents is one of those things that either goes blissfully well or ends up being terribly awkward. If you like the girl, like you say you do, I recommend you meet her parents because it is obviously important to her (even this early on in your relationship).

In my opinion, two months is a little soon. But to other people, two months could feel like a lifetime. I think she likes you or wants an opinion of you from her parents, which is why she’s asking you to meet them 2 months in. So… go! Smile, wear something nice, don’t be too nervous, bring a small host gift for them (if you go to their house), and be a sweet pea to their daughter! If you want to keep seeing this girl, this could help solidify your role in her life. Good luck!

My girlfriend always buys me expensive gifts. I have student loans and I can’t reciprocate all the time. Does she expect me to? — Justin

Charlsie Says: No. Hopefully your girlfriend is going to know that you have student loans and things to take care of, and if you treat her right, gifts and presents won’t always be something she expects in return. However, if she is the type of girl who wants expensive gifts and constant presents to reaffirm your relationship together, and she is fully aware of the responsibilities in your life (like student loans), you could have a problem down the road when it comes to her expectations about these sorts of things. If she starts making comments or acting upset that you aren’t reciprocating presents all the time or you can’t buy her expensive things like she may be buying you, then you need to bring it up and re-evaluate this part of your relationship.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.

Ask A Chick: Brazilian Wax Backfire, Facebook Relationship Status, Where The Ladies At This Summer

I bought my girlfriend a brazilian wax gift certificate because I thought it would be a fun gift for the both of us. Bad idea, she was hella pissed. What’s wrong with this? — Darius

Charlsie Says: Darius, what if your girlfriend took you to a salon and told you to get on all fours as they waxed the hair out of your butt crack because she thought it would be a fun gift for the both of you? Seriously buddy, come on now. It was a slap in the face that more than likely said “Um, I don’t like the grooming you have down there, so I took it upon myself to make it fit my needs.”

Women hear it all the time, “You must be shaved. You must be waxed.” We hear it, loud and clear. We get where this comes from, but if we chose to not have every last hair from our lady parts removed, waxed, or plucked — that’s up to us.

If this is something that truly turns you on and you wanted to see for yourself on her, you should have talked to her beforehand instead of putting the pressure on with a gift certificate because if anything, she felt completely bombarded by this and if she was open to getting a Brazilian wax before this, she might not be now. Try again but steer clear of personal grooming habits unless you’re down with her requesting you stencil in stars and hearts into your summer beard.

How important is being Facebook official to a girl? — Ryan

Charlsie Says: I don’t see why a relationship has to be Facebook official. To me, it’s pointless and in my last serious relationship, being Facebook official was never something either us felt was necessary. However, that’s my personal preference and I know that a lot of women feel differently about this.

With social media platforms such as Facebook being so important to many social circles, I can see why some guys and girls feel that something is not legit or acknowledged until it’s on Facebook. You know how some people would show up at a party together in high school? Now, it’s like you have to show up on the news feed or else it isn’t real. Stupid, right? But it’s the sign of the times. Whether you want to participate or not is up to you.

However, if your girlfriend wants to be Facebook official, but you don’t, I’d just compromise to make her happy because she’ll spend entirely too much time wondering why you won’t change your status and it will cause silly problems. Suck it up if it will make her happy and you like dating her.

Where can I meet a lot of girls this summer? — Paul

Charlsie Says: At a NKOTBSB concert — if you don’t know what the hell that stands for, it’s the joint concert between New Kids On The Block and the Backstreet Boys.

I know you’re rolling your eyes at me and thinking this is the worst idea ever, but seriously, if you want to meet women, ages 18 to 20-something, who are dressed and dolled up in their summer dresses, drunk off of frozen margaritas, and highly aroused — this is the place for you.

If you can get over the fact that you’re witnessing boy bands and their muscles dance in sync, you can probably score at least a dozen numbers way before they even break out into their ballad medleys. Go for it — I triple dog dare you and I’m 99.9% sure it will work.

Submit your questions to Charlsie on Twitter or via email to CharlsieSays@gmail.com.