COED’s Spring Break Fitness Program Courtesy of Men’s Fitness [WEEK 3]

What’s up, COED Nation!? My name is Mike Simone and I’ve been working with COED contributor Charlie Romano for the Men’s Fitness Transformassacre to get him ripped in 8 weeks. Charlie and I worked on breaking things down within this series so that you can also get in Jersey Shore shape by Spring Break season so that you can take on Mexican cartels, scoop up hot college chicks, and kick some doosher ass if you need to. If you’re headed to one of the Trashiest Spring Break destinations we outlined, you’ll likely want to be able to do all three. Here are 4 rules for the 4 weeks prior to Spring Break.

1. PUT DOWN THE BOTTLE

I know – it sounds like blasphemy, but it’s very temporary. Some may claim the strategy of building up alcohol tolerance and preparing the liver for a 7 day, 7 night blurred memory bender but if you want to look your best, try kicking the bottle for 30 days. Why?

Alcohol takes a toll on your metabolism, that means less fat burning and more of a beer belly. All the added calories and late night munchies will screw you. Suck it up! There’s 12 months in a year, 1 month of abstaining from booze to focus on your training and physique will pay off when you’re sluggin’ a 6-er or sippin’ vodka rocks in the hot tub next to the smoke-show chicks looking leaned next to your less dedicated booze hound counterpart male companions.

2. SCREW TRADITIONAL CARDIO

Some cats think that hitting the treadmill, elliptical, or going for long runs is what will get them all tuned up for looking jacked come party time, but there’s an easier way. It’s called High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT for short). You can exchange the 45-60 minutes of boring runs for 20 minutes of “up and down” intervals. Start by jogging for 90 seconds, then sprinting for 30 seconds, and repeating that process until 20 minutes are complete. This shorter term strategy is intense and much more effective in burning off the beer belly fat.

3. KICK PROCRASTINATION AND CREATE ROUTINES

If you’re that dude who does his paper last-minute at 2 AM the day before it’s due, you should know that this attitude won’t cut it this time of year. Once again, there’s 12 months in a year for 1 month, build a routine around 2 things – training and diet. Here are the tips you could use.

1. Pick 3-4 days to work out and stick to it. Monday can be Chest and Triceps, Tuesday can be Back and Biceps, Thursday Legs and Shoulders, Friday Abs and High Intensity Interval Cardio.
2. Sundays are your cooking days. Prepare grilled chicken, turkey burgers or lean beef burgers for the entire week. Oatmeal, sweet potatoes, and steam-able frozen veggies can be your carb and fiber sources. Plan out 4-6 meals per day. It’s easy and will pay off. That means no late night pizza deliveries or General Tso’s Chicken.

4. GO INTO HIBERNATION

You don’t need to be a party animal 24/7. Go into hiding for a little while to focus on your training and diet. You can throw a party night in there once or twice over the month, but going into hibernation will have you focused on looking you best shirtless and in boardies (I hate that word, I prefer trunks.) Then, the minute you get off the plane, bus, train or whatever means of transportation and immediately head to the nearest bar, lounge, or tiki bar. Hell, why not crack open a road soda?

These guidelines might not be the sexiest or the funnest, but they’ll get you real results, real fast.

If you have any questions about getting into ridiculous shape by Spring Break, feel free to hit me or Charlie up on Twitter.

COED’s Spring Break Fitness Program Courtesy of Men’s Fitness [WEEK 2]

Spring Break is creeping up and we are one week closer to the day you thank COED and Men’s Fitness for getting you ripped to pieces. For those of you who aren’t familiar with this program from week 1, I’ll be getting personal training from Dan Trink at one of the countries best gyms (Peak Performance in New York City) and will be sharing the wealth and knowledge with you here at COED.

So while I’m doing Men’s Fitness’ Transformassacre, I’ll be getting results in real-time and will be able to update you with how to get the right muscles to impress the ladies at Spring Break, while being strong enough to hold your own if some meat head wants to throw down. That being said, while you’re welcome to follow the Transformassacre on Men’s Fitness, this series will be my take on getting the right muscles to kick some ass and look damn good.

We’re going to break down body parts below. I recommend you dedicated one day each week to the below while giving yourself a day of rest in between each. If you really want to push it, do some form of cardio on your “off” days.

POINTS OF INTEREST

ABS AND OBLIQUES

It’s no secret that chicks love abs. Whether it be a nice six-pack or a ridiculous V-cut, girls love it and that’s why the Situation gets so much ass (even in season one before he was famous). To be frank, having a six-pack isn’t as popular as it used to be – but having killer obliques will make you stand out above the juice heads who are just chomping down fat burner pills to try to look shredded.

How to get them: I know I mentioned this last week, but I can’t stress enough how important the right diet is. Most guys have a ridiculous six pack, but it’s covered with layers of fat. So rather than kill yourself doing crunches, and sit-ups – you should be focusing on getting rid of the fat while using your energy to build other muscles.

Getting rid of the fat: Last week, I broke down some food options for you that are low in carbs which is what you want to aim for. Most people get it wrong by trying to eat less fatty foods. Eating fat is great for you as long as it’s the right fat (olive oil, avocado, nut butter – heh heh) and it’s in moderation. Carbohydrates are used for energy, but what you don’t use for energy turns into junk – something you want to eliminate. Eating right, staying hydrated with water, and doing cardio are the main ingredients to getting a ripped mid-section. Following those basic three steps will have you seeing results very quickly. When it comes to cardio, hitting the treadmill; doing jumping jacks; jump rope; even playing full court basketball are all great options.

SHOULDERS AND TRAPS

What does Tom Hardy from The Warrior, Dwight Howard, and Ronnie (Jersey Shore) have in common besides you not wanting to f*ck with them? They all have big trapezius muscles and strong shoulder muscles (deltoids). From a vanity standpoint, these muscles are important for looking (and feeling) strong while also being able to lift heavy weight (like two girls, perhaps).

How to get them: Unlike getting shredded abs, building traps and shoulders require you to work with weight. Whether you have a gym you can hit up or some rinky-dink equipment lying around your place (like a dumbbell) – you at least have something to work with.

The Workout: We’re going to ease into these muscle groups, but your go-to workout to build your traps are going to be shrugs. Your go-to workout for tearing up your shoulders are going to be a lateral raise and a shoulder press. These all sound difficult, but they’re not so bad. Aim for three sets of each and try to get 8 reps in – meaning you are lifting and putting down the weight 8 times and then resting for 60 seconds before doing the same thing again. Make sure you pick a weight that you are comfortable with and capable of doing three sets of 8 reps with. Click on the links of each exercise for instructions on how to properly execute.

ARMS (BICEPS AND TRICEPS)

Time to give everyone tickets to the gun show! Arms are tricky because if they are too big, you look like a tool – at the same time, you don’t want to look like wimp. That being said, having “strong” looking arms tends to align with having respectable size and being toned enough that people can see a deep dimple into your tricep and when you flex your bicep it looks bigger than people expected.

How to get them: The gym has a lot of machines that target these muscles very specifically.

The Workout: Whether using gym equipment or your own barbell/dumbbells, the key to getting biceps is doing curls in various different types of grips (grab the bar wide, then narrow, then neutral, etc.) – if you only have dumbbells, do standard curls, then try zottman, and hammer curls.  When it comes to triceps, you can use various equipment or weights, but to keep things simple – I recommend doing dips. Dips can be done with two chairs, a bench, a bed, or a dip bar.

MOTIVATION

You know we wouldn’t leave you hanging. Rather than leaving you with Spring Break girls this week, we’re showing you fit girls who bust their a** in the gym – something you should be making moves on to be the king of Spring Break. Once you’re done working your eyeballs, check out Men’s Fitness for the beginning of YOUR transformassacre.

COED’s Spring Break Fitness Program Courtesy of Men’s Fitness

Spring Break is closer than you think. If you want to hook-up with the girl out of your league or be able to outrun the police or win that push up contest, you need to get your @ss in shape. That being said, COED teamed up with Men’s Fitness to hook you up with an 8-week transformation to get you ripped by Spring Break. Why? Because it’s all about looks. Look better than the next guy and you’ve got an in.

Each week we’ll be hooking you up with updates. Don’t be discouraged because I’ll be right there with you undergoing the transformation. MF hooked me up with one of the best trainers in the country (Dan Trink) at the accredited NYC gym, Peak Performance. All of the info I have below is what Dan has instructed me to do and I’ll be doing it along with you. Let’s get to it…

GOLDEN RULES

• Make sure you are committed. If you’re ready to do this and make moves, socialize what you are doing and throw it on Facebook and Twitter. Doing so will keep you in it because you’ll know you have to deal with your friends who will bust your balls if you quit (besides, socializing it might even help you get a gym partner). Hell, maybe that hot girl who accepted your friend request will comment and want to join your cause.
• When it comes to getting toned, dieting and eating right is hands down the most important thing. You’ll have to pass on the dominoes and easy mac, but it will be worth it in the long run – so start to clean the crappy junk food out of your stash.
• No eating two hours before bed. I know it’s not easy, but you need to imagine those two hours before you go to sleep as a food-free zone.

THE MEAL PLAN

The diet I’ll be following is like the paleo diet which emphasizes limited carbohydrates restricted to fruits and vegetables. What that means is that most foods will be similar to what cavemen had to eat like meat, nuts, salad, etc. The first two or three days of eating like this will suck because you will feel tired and grumpy, but after that you’ll feel better than you were before you even started this.

Almost every meal should consist of a lean protein, a vegetable/fruit, and a fat. Acceptable options could be:

• Lean Protein: Sirloin, top round beef, lean ground beef, lean ground turkey, skinless turkey, skinless chicken.
• Vegetables / Fruits: Salad, berries, apple, orange, any non-starchy vegetables (broccoli, cauliflower, spinach, string beans, asparagus)
• Fats: Olive oil, coconut oil, natural nut butters (not skippy or Jif), avocado
• You should be drinking water. If you need to binge when you hit the bar, go for vodka or bacardi with club soda and a lime.

A sample meal could be chicken in some mixed salad with avocado. Not a fan of chicken, swap out with some sirloin steak. Most of the above won’t break the bank – in fact, you’ll probably save money from not eating out.

SCHEDULING

Scheduling is in my opinion, the hardest part of this whole program. You will have to work out four days per week (not horrible), but you will have to time your meals every day. Each day you should be consuming five meals that are three hours apart with your first meal being within 30 minutes of waking up. Here are some sample meals that were given to me – you can mix up the order, but getting the nutrients is the key.

Meal 1: Lean protein with a handful of mixed nuts

Meal 2: Three eggs with mixed veggies

Meal 3: Large salad with lean protein and avocado

Meal 4: SNACK – apple with nut butter

Meal 5: Small salad with cooked vegetables and lean protein

THE WORKOUT

I’m yet to really get my first training session for this transformation, but when I do you guys will be getting some of the details on the workout program that I’m doing. For now, really focus on the diet – it will be way harder than you think, but you need to be committed. If you really want to start making strides early, you can get into the routine of doing push-ups, squats, and getting in some quality cardio (jumping jacks, jogging, shadowboxing).

MOTIVATION

Need an incentive to put in all of this hard work? Here’s a gallery of sexy Spring Breakers in bikinis – thanks to COED fans, conFITdent, and South Padre. Once you’re done ogling the hotties, head over to Men’s Fitness for the full rundown.

COED’s Bar & Party Tricks: The Ghost Toothpick [VIDEO]

The key to being the life of any party is to be entertaining. With the music blasting, it gets harder to entertain via conversation. With your drunk ass stumbling, it gets harder to entertain with your atrocious dance moves. Allow Dr. Otter (me) to show you some fool-proof tricks that are perfect for taking over a room while also doubling as the perfect ice breaker for any hottie that you have your eyes on. Pull off some of these party tricks I’ll be delivering to you and you’ll see phone numbers and free drinks appearing faster than you can say, “abracadabra, holmes”.

Rule 1: Practice your ass off before doing the tricks in public.

Rule 2: Never do a trick more than once for the same audience.

Rule 3: NEVER tell ANYONE how you did it. Let them Google it to find out for themselves. If they persist, it’s simple: “Magic”

My goal is to teach you some quick tips and tricks that you can pull off without much preparation. The key is using typical items found at a bar or party setting, which will make the trick seem more authentic and entertaining. If anybody’s being a hater, just bet him a round of drinks you’ll pull of the trick – after winning the bet, just remember to raise your glass to the @sshole.

There are tons of tricks out there, but once you perform one poorly – you’re audience will be bummed. So instead of just looking up every trick you can find, let us scour the web to find you the most fool-proof and legendary tricks.

THE GHOST TOOTHPICK TRICK

This trick is very simple and seems idiotic once you learn the gimmick behind it. Still, I bet you 100 Jagerbombs that once you perform it on somebody, they’ll be freaking out at your wizardry.

MATERIALS

• One toothpick
• 1/4 inch piece of scotch tape

Liked this? Check out these:
Tricks to Getting Rid of that Beer Belly
Top 5 MacGyver Tricks that Could Save Your Life!
10 Greatest Magic Tricks The World Has Ever Seen
How to Lose Your Virginity Before you Die
How to Spot the One-Night-Stand Girl

The Most Underrated NBA Players of the Last Decade

Throughout the history of the NBA, players who’ve been second fiddle to the team’s franchise star have been just as significant to the team’s success as the big name. Scottie Pippin would’ve been a superstar on any other team had he not played in the Jordan’s shadow throughout his prime. The same can be said of Chris Mullin playing behind Reggie Miller and Joe Dumars to Isaiah Thomas. Every guy has that friend who seems to get lucky more often than he, but we soldiered on like great wingmen. Your time will come, my friends – but this post is dedicated to the NBA’s most underrated and unsung heroes over the last decade.

There are 2 ways to determine if a player is underrated.

• Salary vs. Performance
• Performance vs. Fan Reception & Media Coverage

Without further adieu, may I present the most underrated players in the NBA over the last decade.

2000/2001 SEASON: Aaron McKie

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 31.6 | POINTS: 11.6 | ASSISTS: 5.0 | REBOUNDS: 4.1 | STEALS: 1.0

McKie played the season in the shadow of one of the NBA’s most prolific scorers ever, Allen Iverson. Iverson got an immense amount of attention due to his high scoring numbers, flashy play, and sponsorships with some of the world’s biggest brands. McKie, who won the 6th Man of the Year Award, was also a very strong candidate for the Most Improved Player Award. While the spotlight solely belonged to Iverson, McKie put up numbers that are a few points per game away from Brandon Roy in 2008-2009, when Roy was considered a dark-horse in the MVP race. Even with those very respectable numbers, he did this playing just over 30 minutes.

2001-02 SEASON: Andre Miller

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 37.3 | POINTS: 16.5 | ASSISTS: 10.9 | REBOUNDS: 4.0 | STEALS: 1.6

You may know Andre Miller as a solid player for Portland right now. You may also remember him as the point guard who helped Carmelo Anthony come in to the NBA with guns blazing and then being the key player who was traded for NBA superstar Allen Iverson. Before all of that, Andre Miller played on the Cleveland Cavaliers who were horrendous before drafting LeBron James. While in Cleveland, Andre Miller put up phenomenal numbers for a point-guard, but was still never talked about and not even considered a contender for any awards. Take a nice look at his numbers and compare them to the NBA’s last point-guard to win back-to-back MVP Awards, Steve Nash (’05/06: 20.4 PPG, 10.2 APG, 3.7 RPG, .6 SPG). Not so far apart, are they?

2002-03 SEASON: Gilbert Arenas

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 37.6 | POINTS: 18.3 | ASSISTS: 6.3 | REBOUNDS: 4.7 | STEALS: 1.5

Before Agent Zero became an overpaid superstar for Washington, he was a 2nd round pick in the 2001 NBA draft. What’s more shocking than Arenas being drafted in the 2nd round was that he actually used to be a humble guy and even won the Sportsmanship Award. Arenas quickly went from underrated to overrated after getting into some trouble off of the court and facing some injury issues. To me, the turning point of his career turning him into a falling star came in the playoffs when he used to be humble and a team player. While attempting to make game-tying free-throws, LeBron walked up to him and had something discouraging to say that led Arenas to miss both free-throws and eventually become an arrogant and selfish NBA player.

2003-04 SEASON: Chauncey Billups

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 37.6 | POINTS: 16.9 | ASSISTS: 5.7 | REBOUNDS: 3.5 | STEALS: 1.1

Of this entire list, Chauncey Billups’ emergence was the most shocking. Before the big 3 in Boston and the Heatles, was the Lakers’ dynasty of Kobe Bryant and Shaq. The formidable duo seemed so unbeatable that veterans who wanted to obtain a title all flocked to LA to end their career with a ring including Gary Payton and Karl Malone. To the shock of the NBA world, the Chauncey Billups led Pistons defeated the highly favored Los Angeles Lakers. “Big shot” Billups remained a very clutch and highly coveted player. His recent presence and leadership with the Denver Nuggest almost defeated the new LA tandem of Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol a year and a half ago.

2004-05 SEASON: Dwight Howard

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 32.6 | POINTS: 12.0 | REBOUNDS: 10.0 | STEALS: 1.19 | BLOCKS: 1.7

As the top pick on the draft, some questioned the choice of the Orlando Magic taking Dwight Howard over UConn standout Emeka Okafor. In fact, Dwight Howard didn’t even come close to winning rookie of the year against Emeka Okafor. Fast forward to now and 32 out of 32 GMs would take Dwight Howard over any other center.

2005-06 SEASON: Boris Diaw

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 35.5 | POINTS: 13.3 | REBOUNDS: 6.9 | ASSISTS: 6.2 | BLOCKS: 1.0

Whether it was the D’Antoni offense or the Steve Nash effect, Diaw’s all-around game was on-point and led him to winning the Most Improved Player Award. He is also the last player in the NBA to have played all 5 positions at some point throughout the season – talk about versatility. Diaw was the perfect role-player and a formidable complement to the Nash and Amar’e tandem.

2006-07 SEASON: Stephen Jackson

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 35.5 | POINTS: 14.0 | REBOUNDS: 2.6 | ASSISTS: 3.1 | BLOCKS: 1.0

I feel like Stephen Jackson has been underrated throughout his career, but his off the court antics have also decreased his value. Nonetheless, let me take you back to the 2007 playoffs where Avery Johnson coached the Dallas Mavericks to a phenomenal 70 win season behind league MVP Dirk Nowitzki. What do they have to show for it? A first-round exit at the hands of their former coach and the clutch performances of Baron Davis, Stephen Jackson & Co. Jackson has been a solid all-around player who was always a threat with the ball in his hands. Think of him as the poor-mans Joe Johnson with a gun in his pants.

2007-08 SEASON: Kevin Durant

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 34.6 | POINTS: 20.3 | REBOUNDS: 4.4 | ASSISTS: 2.4 | BLOCKS: .9

In my opinion, Kevin Durant is the best player to have on an NBA team today. Not only is he the most talented scorer right now, but his skill set isn’t built on depreciating athleticism the way that Iverson was built on speed and Shaq was built on strength. Durant has pure skill and a lanky body, which will not depreciate with experience. People knew that Durant would be a solid pro, but had no idea that it would be to the magnitude that it is. In fact, he was heckled for not being able to bench 180 lbs. at the NBA combine. Durant had a great one-year career in college, but was not the most coveted star in the draft. Instead, he played second fiddle to Greg Oden. Oden, much like Yao Ming, is more of a player you reminisce about rather than talking about his future – if there even is one after his injury plagued career

2008-09 SEASON: Hedo Turkoglu

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 34.6 | POINTS: 16.8 | REBOUNDS: 5.3 | ASSISTS: 4.9 | BLOCKS: .8

Turkoglu’s career year set the tone for Orlando’s future with Dwight Howard. Turkoglu is a solid defender with a great 3 point stroke and also has play maker abilities that are rare in a swingman. After Orlando’s strong play in 2009 (smashing the LeBron led Cavs in the Eastern Conference Finals), Orlando was more aggressive in surrounding Dwight Howard with stellar 3 point shooters that would camp out beyond the arc and wait for Dwight to get double teamed in the paint, leaving one of them wide open for 3.

2009-10 SEASON: Deron Williams

PER GAME NUMBERS: MINUTES: 34.6 | POINTS: 18.7 | REBOUNDS: 4.0 | ASSISTS: 10.5 | STEALS: 1.3

Today, Deron Williams in considered to be one of the best point guards in the league. You can argue that between he, Rajon Rondo, Derrick Rose, and Chris Paul that the league’s best point guard changes every 2 weeks. Last season, there was more hype about Chris Paul than I have seen or heard for a point guard since Jason Kidd’s tenure in New Jersey. Experts were projecting Chris Paul to dominate the league and instead he got hurt. Even with Chris Paul hurt, talks about point guards discussed the sophomore year of Derrick Rose and rookie stand-outs Tyreke Evans and Stephen Curry. Deron Williams took it all in stride and put up monster numbers. The NBA has high hopes of Williams and Rose leading there teams to a championship in the future, reviving the Utah Jazz and Chicago Bulls rivalry from the 90s that was dominated by his royal airness.

2010-11 SEASON: TBD

While writing this post, I kept switching back and forth between a few players and came to the realization that it is simply too early to say. Kevin Love has been putting up amazing numbers, but he is starting to get more attention for it and is getting recognized (which means he won’t necessarily be underrated). Then I take a look at Lamar Odom who has carried the Lakers much more than many people realize, but with the return of Andrew Bynum, Lamar’s numbers may take a plunge.

Liked this? Check out these:
7 Best NBA Finals Games Ever
The 10 Greatest NBA Players without a Championship
5 Best Dressed Players in the NBA
30 Dazzling NBA Dancers Dunking [PICS]
Top 10 Must Have Streetwear / Urbanwear Brands

The Ins & Outs Of Rear Entry

Whether or not you want to admit it – if you haven’t tried it, you at least put some thought into going in through the back door. It’s not for everyone, but more and more couples have been giving it a try (we think that Kelly Divine is the reason behind it). It’s no easy task, my friend; however, lucky you have the benefit of perusing this most informational article. So let’s get into it…

MAKE SURE SHE’S OPEN TO IT

Girls love surprises, but not when it can be excruciatingly painful for them. Make sure that your partner is up for the task, even if it takes some convincing. Don’t be embarrassed to bring it up, her reaction may be more favorable than you think.

BE MENTALLY PREPARED

I used to tell my mom that I was going to play football. I would come home with dirt on my clothes and she would be pissed off. Point of the story, you’re sending your soldier in dirty territory and in some cases he can come back dirty. This will not happen if you prepare accordingly (see below), but it’s important that you stay composed if things get messy. It’s a scary experience for her, too, so to avoid anything messy or any embarrassment keep the lights low or off and use dark sheets.

PREPARE

The preparation kind of breaks into two parts here.

A) In porn, many of the actresses douche themselves before having anal. While this can be necessary, it should not be overdone. Porn stars have stretched anal canals that are more battle-ready than your partner’s will be. As elementary as it may sound, if she goes to the bathroom prior – you can still get your freak on without much of a “mess.” Feeling like Casanova? Have some foreplay in the shower beforehand to make the preparation a little sexier.

B) With the same theme as the shower move above, foreplay is critical when going through the back door. By initiating foreplay, you’ll keep her at ease and relaxed (and more willing) – setting the mood and making everything a lot easier, especially the next step.

BE EQUIPPED

My guess is 5 out of 5 guys read this headline and mistook it for their endowment. You need to be equipped with a ton of lube. I can’t emphasize this enough, but this is by far the most important rule here. For the sake of your member and her pipes, you need to load up on lube. Without getting into the horrific details, the absence of lube can lead to some insane pain and possibility of getting nailed with a disease or infection.

PLAY YOUR PART AND PERFORM

You’re not in a porno. Take it slow and stay focused on her pleasure points while she becomes familiar with the sensation. As selfish as it may sound, the first couple times are all about her. You should enjoy that there is more friction, which will make it satisfying for you – still, the focus needs to be on her being comfortable and getting more into it.

KEEP YOUR MOUTH SHUT

When it all comes down to it, this rule applies to ALL hookups of any kind – especially anal sex. You need to keep your mouth shut and leave all of the kissing and telling to the girls. It’ll boost your confidence when your friends are trying to one up each other, but you’ll secretly know that you are five steps ahead of them. Do yourself a favor and keep your mouth shut, leave the bragging to the girls as talks you up to be the bedroom legend that you are.

Liked this? Check out these:
40 Mistakes Men Make While Having Sex
21 Crazy Sex Facts
The 17 Sexiest Suicide Girls
COED Interviews Pornstar Bree Olson!
Sex Ed With Casey Parker

8 Things You Should NEVER Keep From Your Friend

With the upcoming release of The Dilemma, we thought we should remind all of you wingmen out there on one of the most overlooked rules of the unwritten bro code – omitting information. There are plenty of times where you need to keep details to yourself (especially to avoid drama), but sometimes it is hard to distinguish when to share certain information and when to keep your mouth shut. Lucky for you, we outline what information that you, as a dude, are required to share with your friend.

IF HIS CHICK IS HOOKING UP WITH SOMEONE ELSE

Whether it be a girlfriend, wife, friend with benefits, or a girl you friend likes (even if you know he’ll never make the move) – you must tell your pal he is getting played for a fool. I know nobody likes to be the bearer of bad news and he might not even take your word for it, but the truth is going to come out sooner or later. Spare your friend the heartache and drama by telling him what you know, so he can get out before things get messy.

IF RUMORS OR GOSSIP COULD HURT HIS REP

I don’t care if it’s something as embarrassing as girls chatting about your friend’s nipple-sized erection. Nobody likes having others talk badly about them and if this happens to be the case with one of your friends, it is your duty to fill him on the slander (regardless of  if it is true or not). You need to deliver this news gently and remind your friend that instead of overreacting, that he needs to step his game up to prove any negative rumors wrong. Once people get defensive about rumors, it’s almost impossible to find the source of the gossip. The more casual your friend reacts, the easier it should be to find the culprit sullying his good name.

IF IT’S WORK RELATED

If you happen to be working with a friend or happen to hear him bragging about how much of an ass clown he acts like at work, you need to be blunt and tell him to get his act together if he wants to keep getting paid. I know, I know – you are not his boss. BUT, you are his friend and if he winds up without a job, he will be leeching off of you.

IF HE’S A DRUNK ASS

He’ll never realize it, so tell your friend how wasted he really is. Sometimes actions speak louder than words: take his cell phone away to prevent any drunk texts/calls, save him from that hippo who is about to crush his hips into powder on the dance floor.

IF HE’S WHIPPED

A relationship is supposed to be a 50/50 kind of thing. If you see your friend is starting to give 65 or more, he is most likely whipped. Let him know that you feel like he’s been bending over backwards lately and see how he responds. If he is not defensive and is genuinely curious, slap him around and tell him how it is. If he gets defensive, then he is proving your point.

IF HE’S IN THE FRIEND ZONE

Man knows no destination worse than the friend zone. If you see your friend bound for this godforsaken trench, be sure to give him the heads up ASAP. This can be done most effectively by pointing out all of the negatives in the subject and in some cases, even making some up; tell him you heard her rip one and it smelled atrocious, anything to get him out of the friend zone. It will make you an unsung hero for years to come.

IF YOU SPOT A PORN CAMEO

Say what you want, but while sites like DareDorm, CFF, BangBros, and Brazzers are introducing new girls in their late teens and young twenties every day, the odds of your average college girl appearing in one of these videos gets greater and greater. True Story: When partying in Cabo for Spring Break, I witnessed the dudes from Naughty America pick up a college girl, get her wasted, had her sign some forms and they disappeared for a few hours. You figure it out. I assure you, this is a much more common scenario than you’d think.

IF SHE’S A KEEPER

Losing your best wingman is never easy, but if it’s for his own good – then you need to let it go. I hate to toot my own horn, but I used to hook my friends up with any girls that I was friends with and would also sing their praises to any of my overflow. On top of that, I would never turn down a night out and would also jump on a grenade or land mine if it meant a friend succeeding. Still, when I dated a girl that was a keeper – my friends would let me know. Look at me now! Dating a super model and I am the quarterback of the Patriots! (What? I’m not Tom Brady? Sh*t!) Just kidding. In all seriousness though, be a real friend and let your pal know when you think he has found a keeper. You never know, it could lead to you giving that best man speech you’ve been practicing for years (the one about the Wolf pack looking for strippers and cocaine).

…Now, go forth. Make us proud. Tell your bud about that female co-worker he hooked up with who’s secretly in porn and heard he wets the bed …

Liked this? Check out these:
How To Avoid The Friend Zone [RENATA'S RECOS]
7 Ways To Tell If Your Friend Is On Steroids
5 Ways to Tell If Your Friend Really Hooked Up
How To Tell Your Friend His Girlfriend Sucks
Top 10 Pranks To Torture Your Friends

COED’s Movie Guide To Picking Up Chicks [VIDEO]

It ain’t easy being single. Each year millions of men plunk down serious cash to learn the ways of the woman in the hopes they can get a little of the ol’ in-and-out. For some guys, picking up chicks is like second nature – they have the confidence and more importantly the thick skin to brush off wisecracks, putdowns, and negs. While pick up artists like Mystery wear goofy sh*t and pretend there are fights outside to get a woman’s attention, we at COED look no further than the movies for our inspiration. Yes, movies are fictional, contrived, carefully and meticulously structured works in which all involved are conspiring to get you to suspend your disbelief but sometimes there are some truths hidden within its smoke and mirrors. These following tips and movies are shining examples of how to at least get them on the hook. The rest is up to you, playboy.

RULE #1: Always know (or pretend to know) what you’re talking about

As Seen In: Wedding Crashers

RULE #2: Learn some basics about her from a distance (without stalking, you creep)

As Seen In: Hitch

RULE #3: Never let an ex bring you down

As Seen In: Swingers

RULE #4: Only listen to friends who know what they’re talking about

As Seen In: Roger Dodger

RULE #5: Don’t play hard to get

As Seen In: Spread

RULE #6: Stop acting desperate

As Seen In: Tao of Steve

RULE #7: Every girl is always available

As Seen In: Alfie

RULE #8: Be the life of the party

As Seen In: Van Wilder

RULE #9: At least attempt to dance

As Seen In: Knocked Up

RULE #10: If you must lie, do it right

As Seen In: Magnolia

RULE #11: Look at her eyes

As Seen In: Superbad

RULE #12: No. pick-up lines. ever.

As Seen In: A Night at the Roxbury

RULE #13: Use your tools

As Seen In: Ocean’s Thirteen

RULE #14: Always note your surroundings

As Seen In: Role Models

RULE #15: Stop wondering and just approach her

As Seen In: Vicky Christina Barcelona

Liked this? Check out these:
Picking Up Chicks In Non Pick Up Situations
How to Pick Up Girls by Pretending to be a Pro Surfer
How To: Get Girls Without Losing Weight
How To Turn a Hookup Into a Relationship
6 Pick-Up ‘Negs’ Every Guy Needs To Be Aware Of

8 Western Movies Every Guy Should See [VIDEO]

The Coen Brothers remake of the western classic “True Grit” hits theaters tomorrow. If you haven’t seen the previews or opened your eyes in the past week, “True Grit” stars Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon, Josh Brolin, and this 14 year old prodigy Hailee Steinfeld. Bridges plays a tough U.S. Marshal who helps a stubborn young woman played by Steinfeld track down her father’s murderer. They showed a clip from the movie on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon last night and she was unbelievably good. Anyway, you should go see it. Also, here are 8 other westerns that should be in your Netflix queue.

3:10 to Yuma

The storyline to this movie is as bad-ass as you can get – Batman and Maximus battling it out Western style. Without spoiling the plot for you, Dan (played by Christian Bale) is a rancher who has captured one of the most reckless outlaws, Ben Wade, and has to get him on the 3:10 train to Yuma to get hung. Under his capture, the outlaw (played by Russell Crowe) grows a lot of respect for the rancher. The sh*t totally hits the fan when the train is running late and Ben Wade’s henchmen offer $100 to anybody who gets a shot on Dan, causing him to try to make it through a whole town of gunfire to make sure Ben gets on the 3:10 train.

Appaloosa

More often than not, the root of all drama is women. The main plot of this movie surrounds two bad-asses that are hired to police a town. They run the town pretty ruthlessly and make you feel like America is now run by a bunch of pansies. Ed Harris and Viggo Mortensen do a really great job in bringing really good acting back to the Western genre, which it had not seen since Clint Eastwood and Paul Newman.

The Quick and the Dead

Let me be crystal clear in saying that the realism in this film may not be as on-point as the rest of this list, but it may very well be the most entertaining. Leonardo DiCaprio, Russell Crowe, Sharon Stone,and Gene Hackman do an awesome job in making the movie one that can be watched again and again. Long story short: Russell Crowe is a priest who is against violence, but has the fastest hands in the West. He is forced to kill when the town undergoes a tournament of duels, leaving hot shots like Leonardo DiCaprio (playing a role similar to Billy the Kid) compete for a fortune. Intertwined story-lines and Sharon Stone’s boob are enough to keep you engaged, while the cocky one-liners will keep that stupid smirk on your face.

Tombstone

Wouldn’t life be easier if you only had to retire once? Right Brett Favre? Tombstone is a movie with plenty of blood that follows a lawman who tries to move to a remote town in his retirement, only to be hunted down by all of the outlaws that he brought down in his prime.

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

Quite possibly the most famous of all Western films, the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly has a formula that has recently been resurrected in Hollywood with films like Spiderman 3 and the Dark Knight. Aside from having your good guy and bad guy, there is an additional character that plays a pivotal role throughout the entire film (much like Harvey Dent). In doing so, making the plot much harder to predict than your usual western film. This film has everything that makes a Western movie complete: bounties, greed, alliances, and gun slinging.

The Assassination of Jesse James

We often think of villains as characters that cannot be trusted and spend their lives doing terrible things for little to no purpose. Ironically, this film will have you sympathizing for the “villain.” The film follows the posse of one of the most notorious outlaws in American history, Jesse James, while showing the compassionate and caring side of James. The title (and history) may spoil the end of the film for you, but we highly recommend watching it.

Unforgiven

Clint Eastwood, arguable the best Western actors ever makes you never want to mess with an older guy with his interpretation of retired Old West gunslinger William Munny. After taking one last job, with the help of his old partner and a young man, William Munny is forced to sacrifice more than he ever has to come out on top against one of the most feared outlaws in the country.

Dances with Wolves

This movie has a storyline that has been repeated over and over again in Hollywood. Similar to the more recent films like the Last Samurai and Avatar, this movie will make you want to stand up to bullies. After being exiled, a Lieutenant is forced to live amongst wolves and Native Americans, giving him a new found respect for their values and way of living. His new found compassion for the Native Americans make him feel obligated to help them defend themselves.

Liked this? Check out these:
The 7 Greatest American Spy Films Of All-Time
Sam McPheeters’ “Quant” Will Be A Movie And It Will Be AWESOME
12 Facts You Didn’t Know About Home Alone Till Now
Casting The All Female A-Team [The T&A Team?]
The Girls of Black Swan

SUPER UPDATE On The Most Anticipated Superhero Movies

Bruce Wayne. Tony Stark. Megatron. If you know who those 3 are, you’ve passed the geek test and will be in for a treat with this post. With superhero movies coming out every weekend these days, we thought we’d be the filter for you and give you some insight on some of the most anticipated super hero movies to come over the next couple of years. There have also been numerous rumors leaving everybody scrambling the find some truth. Without further adieu, allow us to separate the crap from he facts…

BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT RISES

The Dark Knight left us all waiting for a bat signal of what will come in the next film. Lucky for you, we have some dirt.

WHAT WE KNOW: Super Director, Christopher Nolan, finally gave the media some insight on what can be expected in the latest installment of the Batman series – mainly identifying that the villain will not be the Riddler and that he will not give in to the 3D craze, but will rather employ the HD and IMAX aesthetics that were used in the Dark Knight.

WHAT WE HEAR: Rumor has in that Tom Hardy (RocknRolla, Inception), will be cast in the film. He is definitely a great actor and after seeing him work with Nolan in Inception, we have sky-high expectations for his role in the Dark Knight Rises. There is a lot of chatter that the Black Mask, Hush, and Croc are the front-runners for the villain, but there are no sources with enough clout for us to back any of it up.

WHAT WE EXPECT: Hard to say. Why? If you ask 1 million people what the best super hero movie is to date, I assure you that the overwhelming majority will say The Dark Knight. So, while I have no doubt whatsoever that the next installment will be phenomenal, I am unsure if it will meet people’s stratospheric expectations. Christian Bale is an insanely talented actor, as is Hardy, and Christopher Nolan is one of the most coveted Directors these days – so they have the talent. Now it’s time to back it up…

CAPTAIN AMERICA

Chris Evans will have another whirl at being a super hero. He definitely looks the part with the pictures that have leaked so far.

WHAT WE KNOW: Captain America is a very important character within the Avengers, especially since he is the first Avenger. With hints of Captain America’s arrival to Hollywood appearing in Iron Man 2, we know that this film will also have some tie-ins to 2012′s Avengers.  We know that the storyline here indicates that in receiving the super soldier serum (also used in The Incredible Hulk movie) Captain America leads a group of elite soldiers.

WHAT WE HEAR: We hear that Chris Evans (Fantastic Four, Push, The Losers) got ridiculously ripped for this movie and took it very seriously. We hear that the original Captain America costume will only be seen briefly in this movie as it is used for propaganda, where Captain America will then go to Tony Stark (Iron Man) and ask him to make some modifications.

WHAT WE EXPECT: Chris Evans is a talented character, but seems to always be the immature wise-ass in all of his roles lately. This might make it a little difficult to take him seriously when it counts. Still, there will be a ton of cross paths with other super heroes in this film and multiple references to other characters (maybe even some cameos). Expect this movie to be entertaining as hell, but not a fan favorite (like X Men Origins: Wolverine).

THE GREEN LANTERN

Ryan Reynolds (also in Scarlett Johansson) trades in being a villain (Deadpool) for being a super hero in Green Lantern.

WHAT WE KNOW: We know that we like 90% of movies with Ryan Reynolds in it (Amityville Horror, X Men Origins: Wolverine, Van Wilder, Smokin’ Aces). He is talented and while he did have many immature and wise-ass roles, he has show us that he can also play a more serious character. This is definitely important for super-hero movies as it builds to the suspense and showdown with the villain when you see that the protagonist seems genuinely concerned rather than cracking jokes.

WHAT WE HEAR: We hear that there will be some references and scenes on planet Oa. We also heard that the power battery looked awesome at the Scream 2010 awards. Rumor has it that the first teaser of Green Lantern will be unveiled during the latest Harry Potter installment that will be here in a few short weeks.

WHAT WE EXPECT: We expect this movie to be decent, but while we like Green Lantern – he may not be the best character to make a full length feature film about. It will be really challenging for special effects to justify the power ring.

THOR

Chris Hemsworth (Star Trek) shows that he can handle taking a lead role in an A-List franchise.

WHAT WE KNOW: Chris Hemsworth got ridiculously jacked for this movie. We all know that Thor was pretty diesel and that the legendary hammer must be heavy as hell, but still – this guy got jacked. Like Captain America, Thor plays an important role in the Avengers so you can expect a lot of references to other super heroes and perhaps even some cameos.

WHAT WE HEAR: We hear that the Frost Giants (bad guys) look pretty awesome and that Loki (Tim Hiddleston) and Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) played their parts flawlessly, while Odin (Anthony Hopkins) wasn’t as convincing.

WHAT WE EXPECT: We expect this movie to be really good. The special effects will be the challenging part considering the setting and complexity of some of the action sequences. Still, there is enough talent in this cast and the right team together that can really pull this off. Our prediction is that like Captain America, this will be a thoroughly entertaining film, but will not reach Dark Knight status.

THE AVENGERS

Comic book fans and super hero enthusiasts are going to cream their pants when this movie comes to theaters. With the anticipation for this building ever since the end of Iron Man, you can expect this film to be a huge hit. Story lines from Iron Man and Iron Man 2, Captain America, and Thor are all certain to be intertwined by leading up the The Avengers.

WHAT WE KNOW: We know the cast is set to be Robert Downey Jr. (Iron Man), Chris Evans (Captain America), Jeremy Renner (Hawkeye) Chris Hemsworth (Thor), Scarlett Johansson (Black Widow), Samuel L. Jackson (Nick Fury), Lou Feriggno (The Incredible Hulk), Don Cheadle (War Machine). There is a ton of talent in this movie and it should most definitely be a blockbuster.

WHAT WE HEAR: We hear that the wildcard here will be the villains. We hear that the story lines from films that starred each of the super heroes above will all be intertwined into the plot of The Avengers. Aside from that, there isn’t enough detail or legit sources to really dish some more exciting dirt here.

WHAT WE EXPECT: We are unsure how great the movie will actually be, but we still expect it to be a huge hit at the box office. We expect each high profile super hero to play their role really well, but we have no doubt that Samuel L. Jackson will be terrible as Nick Fury. Our prediction is that Robert Downey Jr. completely outshines the other stars of this film, but the story line will still make it a huge hit.

STILL DEVELOPING (PRE-PRODUCTION)

Superman Project: Thank God that Superman Returns will not be our most recent memory of one of the most iconic superheroes. Super Director Christopher Nolan (Batman Begins, The Dark Knight, Inception) has been given the nod to direct and re-boot the Superman franchise. Expect it to be HUGE. While they are very few details about the movie, we like what we hear so far about Nolan running the show.

The Flash: The Flash is one of the wittiest of the super heroes and the movie will be a great balance of humor, action, and drama. Rumor has is that Chris Pine (Star Trek) was offered the lead, but that is just a rumor.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon: We know that Megan Fox is out and this will have an explosion every 5 seconds since Michael Bay is still the director. We will definitely miss Megan melting the screen, but they definitely found a capable replacement in Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.

Deadpool Project: There are plenty of rumors that Deadpool will get his own movie after an appearance as the main villain in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Ryan Reynolds played Deadpool perfectly and with a very interesting backs tory, this film will surprise many with it’s success.

Liked this? Check out these:
7 Superheroes/Villains for the 21st Century
The Dirty Dozen: Dirty Fighting Superheroes!
Top 20 Most Anticipated Movies of 2011
7 Worst Storylines in Modern Comic History
COED’s Colossal Comic-Con Cleavage Collection [120 Photos]

5 Reasons Why You Should Start Watching Glee

The show Glee has been a monster hit. The recipe of celebrity cameos, acapella covers of pop hits, and a feel good story has everybody buzzing about the show. Sounds like a cheesy show for girls, right? Wrong.

There are plenty of reasons for you to start watching Glee. Here are a few of them…

YOU CAN REMINISCE ABOUT HIGH-SCHOOL

Whether you were on an athletic team, the school play, or lost your virginity - we all have something to smile about when we think of high school. Glee touches base on all three of the above and will definitely bring back some of your best memories from when you used to be cool (ohhhh!).

ALMOST EVERY GIRL WATCHES IT

From coeds to cougars, girls love this show. They love talking about it to their friends and anybody else who watches it. You can easily get away with a Glee related ice-breaker or jump into a conversation with the hot girl in class about the latest episode. While you’re at it, why not invite her to your dorm to watch the next one (wink, wink)?

THE SONGS ARE CATCHY

The same way that Rock Band and Guitar Hero had you singing throwbacks, this show will do the same. Journey, Aerosmith, Sisqo, MC Hammer – it’s all there.

THE STORY LINE ISN’T TERRIBLE

The plot can get pretty cheesy at points, but every guy likes an underdog story (See: Rocky, Rudy, etc.). This story is about a group of high-school misfits who join the glee club and compete for a championship. There are a bunch of subplots involving the kind of high-school drama you used to love. The fact the cast actually sings all the songs is pretty admirable.

THE GIRLS ARE SMOKING HOT

Let’s be honest, high-school girls are hot. Maybe its the cheerleader outfits or maybe its the schoolgirl uniforms. Unless you are still in high school, high school girls are not acceptable for you to hook up with. Lucky for you, the girls acting as high school girls on Glee are all of legal age! (they’re DTF, believe me). There is a little something for everybody: slutty cheerleaders, nerds anxious to lose their virginity, and even a goth.

Glee airs Tuesdays at 8pm ET on FOX. Catch the season 2 premiere tonight! Invite over some girls beforehand for a briefing.