5 Worst Sporstcasters on TV

Guys love to watch sports. It’s the best thing on television and it provides all the necessary drama for our lives. But if there’s one thing that can ruin a game or ESPN top ten plays, it’s the sportscasters. While some provide us with everything we need to know to bro out and talk about sports, others leave us pissed off and filled with useless phrases. Some can even make you change channels from a game or SportsCenter to any one of these horrible shows. So, if you are watching a game or anything related to sports, and you see any of these five, you might as well give up and change the channel.

Stephen A. Smith

If guys wanted to hear someone screaming and complaining, they would watch E! or something equally ridiculous. How did this guy even get on air? Instead of telling anything important regarding sports, he simply rants and raves about stories that he can insert himself into. The sports world would be a better place if he were to magically fall of the face of it. “Quite Frankly” is by far the worst show on ESPN, and he is easily the worst person to watch on TV.

Dick Vitale

Who knew March Madness could be ruined by an old, balding guy? I personally didn’t think it was possible. But watching more than one game a week with this guy as the color commentator may be the worst thing in sports. But it gets worse. He and Dick Enberg created possibly the worst college basketball experience known to bro-kind. There is a simple remedy though, and it involves drinking. Every time he says “baby” (or in this case “take the charge”) drink… and pretty soon you won’t be able to hear his voice.

Jeff Van Gundy

Not only is he one of the most awkward looking people on TV, but this guy honestly provides no useful conversation during a game. He simply talks and reminds everyone of how good of a coach he used to be. Unfortunately for television viewers, he was such a bad coach that we are forced to listen to him reminisce. Not to mention, he is obsessed with anything his brother does, says, wears, etc. Jeff was a bad coach, but he was not nearly as bad as he is on TV. But hey, he is a better commentator than a singer.

Avery Johnson and most ex-All Stars

Avery is the perfect example of a player who goes to TV and fails. His voice is like nails on a chalk board. Even when he says something beneficial, you can’t pay attention to it because of his voice. ESPN has realized this and relegated him to the second-team of sportscasters. But every once in a while, he’s on a game and just demolishes it. Not only is he annoying, but he’s a close second to Van Gundy in the ugly category. There’s really no positive to him, or really most other ex-All Stars, as a sportscaster. Just watch the video and you’ll see Jalen Rose, Avery Johnson, and Andre Igoudala fail at telling anyone anything of importance.

Women sideline reporters

Putting these women on the field may have been the worst decision made in sports. Yeah, a few are really attractive, but the minute they open their mouths, their looks go to waste. Some of the things they say are absolutely ridiculous and can make you want to sit in silence rather than watch the game. Women are successful on the sidelines as cheerleaders, and they should stick to that rather than tell viewers unnecessary things about players’ antics on the sidelines. Until they find a really hot girl that can ask good questions in an interview or provide useful information from the sidelines, you should just hit mute anytime you see them on air.

5 Ways To Tell If A Girl Wants To Hook Up

Dates aren’t the easiest things in the world for guys. Girls are extremely complicated and, often times, throw mixed signals. How can you tell if she wants to hook up with you at the end of the date (or more realistically sloppy bar night)? To be honest, there’s no definitive way to tell. But, here are five cues that could potentially help you from getting embarrassingly denied.[/slide]

Hair Flip

This is a difficult one to catch as girls are constantly playing with their hair. But, if a girl runs her hand through her hair and flips it, that means she’s interested in pursuing more after the date. It also means that whatever you’re doing conversation-wise is good. This is a good sign, but it in no ways means you’re in the clear. It’s just a move that gives you insight into what she’s thinking. If you get the hair flip, you at least have a chance.[/slide]

Laughs at all Your Jokes

Let’s be honest — some of our jokes just aren’t that funny. A good tester to see if a girl wants you is to throw out a bad one and see her response. If she laughs, she’s into you. She wants to explore, sexually, where you two can go. And if she doesn’t laugh, you can either recover or bail. Easy test for guaranteed results.

I Had a (insert positive adjective) Time/Night

If a girl says this, you did everything right. They don’t throw this out there without semi-meaning it. You’re still not there yet though, because when she says this, it means she’s still on the fence. You’ve got a chance to really nail it, so don’t mess it up after hearing this.
Note: I had a good time/night means you have failed. Good is the key term here as it separates hooking up from striking out. Like I said, girls are complicated and it’s our job to interpret, but this is one sure-tell sign that you aren’t getting laid.[/slide]

Unnecessary Touching

Unless this girl has been all over you the entire time, a simple touch, stroke, whatever at the end of night means she wants you. You have the green light to kiss, but nothing more than that yet. It’s all up to you now because this touching tells you that the rest of the night is in your hands. Be careful, though, because one small wrong move, and you are out.

Minimal Eye Contact

Life is not a movie. You don’t stare into a girls eyes for multiple seconds before you kiss. Rather, girls struggle to look you in the eye if they are really into you and want to hook up. They look at you, and then look down and smile. It’s surprising, but every girl has this tell, and when you see it, get ready for a good end to the night.

5 Best Things to Grill Besides Burgers and Dogs

Nothing says summer like a nice barbecue. But, hamburgers and hot dogs can get old really fast. Don’t worry, there are a lot of items that can be thrown on a grill that many never think of grilling. Here are the top five unusual food items that will spice up your barbecues and leave everyone impressed with your superior grilling abilities.

5. Oysters

This is a pretty simple thing to cook and  they taste really good when done right. All you have to do is throw the oysters on the grill and wait for the shells to open a little. Once they open, the oysters are done and ready to serve. No marinade is needed for the oysters, but feel free to add whatever you like to spice up the taste. Once you’ve had oysters from a grill, it’ll be tough to go back to a burger.

4. Grilled cheese and other sandwiches

This meal is pretty self-explanatory and, in its name, asks to be cooked on the grill. But most people leave their “grilling” of these sandwiches to the indoors. Grilled cheeses can easily be converted to melts if you add your favorite meats to them, and there are many other sandwich options besides barbecue pork. Throw any sandwich on the grill and you’ll be surprised at how much better they taste when grilled. It’s a simple fix to a boring sandwich.

3. Pizza

Most of us aren’t lucky enough to have our own private wood-burning pizza oven, so typically we resort to baking pizza (if we even make it at all). But grilling the pizza provides a similar taste to a pizza made in a pizza oven and is a good step-up from delivery. Whatever toppings you want, just put it on the pizza and fire up the grill. It’s extremely cheap to get the ingredients, and nothing says date night like homemade pizza.

2. Chicken on a Throne

This recipe is pretty unusual, but it mixes two awesome things — beer and grilling. All you do is put the chicken on a beer can of your choice (the type of beer all depends on the flavoring that you desire). Leave a little of the beer can sticking out, and then put the chicken on the grill. The beer will evaporate from the can while cooking, but on its way out it will seep into the chicken providing an awesome taste that you can’t get with rotisserie chickens. Trust me, this chicken is a feast and needs to be in your grilling books.

1. Fruit

The easiest way to grill fruit is by putting it on a kebab or by slicing it and just putting it straight on the grill. Pineapple works best for grilling, but most fruits can be grilled. Every type of fruit when grilled  is absolutely delicious. You can also add grilled fruit to just about everything, even burgers, to give some different flavor than your typical grilling party. Grilled fruit even goes great with beer.

5 Chick Flicks Guys Love to Watch

Chick flicks can be brutal movies. After all they all basically the same story line in every single one. But, every once in a while, creators throw guys a break, providing some comedic and entertaining parts just for guys. It’s like someone out there knows that in the middle of a theater of crying girls, there sits one miserable boyfriend. Here are the top five chick flicks that guys, secretly and not so secretly, don’t mind watching.

5) How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days

Now don’t get me wrong — this movie is as girly as they come. But something about it grows on you. The movie is filled with mockery of its own plot and purpose. It admits that it is a chick flick, but it actively goes on to make fun of the genre. If that’s not amusing enough, watching a girl pretend to put on these acts is definitely entertaining. We all know that these are actual female personalities, so watching them all play out at once makes for a funny movie for dudes because we thankfully don’t have to deal with her.

4) Mean Girls

This movie is absolutely hilarious in that it perfectly describes females in high school environments. They gossip, they backstab, and we get to sit and watch. Not to mention, the girls are super hot. While the story line ends stupidly, the rest of the movie makes up for the girliness. No other movie allows guys to watch girls fight without any of the repercussions of having to be a part of it. It’s the perfect situation.

3) Love and Basketball

This is a classic movie. The interesting part of the movie is watching the leading star make it to the NBA. Sure, it is filled with some love stories here and there, but the movie takes those hits in stride and continues to provide constant entertainment for guys. There’s no denying that the strip basketball game is the coolest, sexiest foreplay in a movie. Not to mention, their rekindling of love towards the end of the movie through a basketball game covers up the chick aspect of the scene. And, no one can deny that they smile watching her play in the WNBA with her husband and son on the side.

2) Jerry Maguire

I know what you are thinking –”Jerry Maguire isn’t a chick flick!” But that’s the beauty of the movie. It is able to hide the feminine aspect of the movie so well that many forget that it is the heart of the chick flick genre. With the necessary storyline (guy gets girl, guy loses girl, guy gets girl back), the movie has all characteristics of a traditional chick flick. Also, Cuba Gooding, Jr. becomes a football star again because he starts to dance and falls in love with the game again. Even with all this, it’s a great movie for guys and has some go-to movie quotes for any situation.

1) Love Actually

No contest. Love Actually is the best chick flick for both sexes. You’d be hardpressed to find any guy who can admit that he didn’t tear up at the final airport scene. All aspects add up to be a chick flick of brutal proportions. But, this movie provides great entertainment for guys as well. Whether it’s Christmas, rainy day, or any day, this movie is a guy favorite. It will not only get you laid if you watch it with a girl but it will also make you feel great. This chick flick is so good it almost becomes a real movie. Even with some of the gushiest chick flick moments, it is the best chick flick a guy can find, and one that no guy will be embarrassed to have in his collection.

6 Best Outdoor Drinking Games for the Summer

Summer is right around the corner, and that means moving the drinking and the drinking games outside. Nothing is better than enjoying a nice cold one outside with your friends and here at COED we’re all about helping you to get drunk and tan at the same time. But forget trying to play indoor drinking games outdoors. The weather is nice, the sun is out, and you should be playing something that is celebrating the fact that women are walking around wearing practically nothing.

Bocce

A classic game that is easily converted to drinking. Rather than keeping score, the team that is furthest away drinks. How much? It all depends on how much closer the winning team is to the pallino (the small white ball) than the losing team. You can be intense about measurements and give each differing inch a corresponding second of chugging, or have a good, casual time and take as much as the losers want each time. Only catch, if a team gets a bocce (their ball is touching the pallino at the end of the round), the other team has to chug a beer. Sober bocce is great, and adding beer to it only makes it that much better.

Cornhole

Just like bocce, this game is great sober and drunk. Not only is it the fastest growing collegiate sport (I’m not lying, it’s a club activity at most schools sponsored by the university. It was even picked up exclusively by the Big Ten Network and will be coming to television soon), the simple rules allow it to easily be converted to a drinking game and let every person  change up the rules to their liking. Yeah, it’s similar to bocce as a drinking game, but changing things up with all the sunny days in your future is a must. Just get some beer and you’ll have a good time.

Polish Horseshoes

One of the best outdoor drinking games. It’s extremely causal, but it can really mess you up. All you need are two poles (or sticks), beer bottles, and a frisbee. There are a few different game-play rules, but I like to play by these ones. One team throws the frisbee, and you get 3 points for hitting the bottle off the pole directly and 2 points for knocking the bottle off by hitting the pole. The defending team gets a point for catching the falling beer bottle, and if caught, throwing team gets nothing. Simple enough. Play to as many points as you want and add any amount of corresponding drinking to the points. You’ll be set for a nice summer afternoon.

Water Pong

What can be better than drinking at a pool on a hot summer day? Beer pong — in the pool. Best part about it is you don’t need water cups. Just get a floating table (these work great) and put it in the pool. If you really want to, invest in this and make it really classy. House rules still apply. This game takes pool parties to a whole new level and lets you bring beer pong outside without getting grass and dirt all over the balls and in your cups.

Note: Don’t be an idiot and take this game to a public pool. While all the other games can be played anywhere, this is one drinking game that needs to remain in a private or semi-private setting.

Dizzy Bat

Great game for any circumstance. There are two variations for this game that are both equally fun. One is a relay race. Chug a beer, spin ten times, then run to a point and back. Tag the teammate, and the next person goes. Or, fill up a wiffle ball bat with a beer, and then chug that beer. However long it takes in seconds corresponds to the spins you have to do. You then get three pitches to hit a beer can. If you strike out, fill ‘er up and try again. This game is absolutely hilarious to be a part of and to watch. Definitely a go-to game for any summer day/night.

Dropsky Drinksky

This game works best with a keg, but you can do it with cups as well. Simply stand in a circle around the keg or filled cups and throw a football around. Players must be holding a side beer in their hands to make it difficult. If you drop it, you run to the middle, do a keg stand for a previously decided amount of time or chug a cup, run out for a pass, and catch the ball. If you drop it, try again with the drinking included. Beware, this game can hit you hard. Who knew catching a football one-handed could be so hard drunk?

5 Ways to Tell If Your Friend Really Hooked Up

Let’s face it — guys love to talk about sex. Whether it’s sexy celebrities, girls walking down the street, or sexual escapades, this banter surfaces in almost every male conversation. But how can you know your friend is telling the truth? Did he really go all the way with the hot girl that lives on your floor? Here are a few phrases that let you know what your friend and that girl did last night.

“She was such a prude.”

Translation: He has no game whatsoever. Any time the girl is blamed in any way it means one thing: he tried, he failed, he went home alone. No kiss, nothing. There wasn’t even a valiant effort to be proud of. If he’s your friend, let this go, because this is an admission of failure. Take him out and be his wingman, because he definitely needs all the help he can get.

“I don’t kiss and tell”

Translation: Any variation of this means he struck out hard. He may have made a valiant effort, maybe even gave her a hug, but he went to bed alone. There’s no way a guy does anything with an attractive girl and doesn’t tell his friends. It’s as simple as that. But, this could mean he went all the way with a gross girl, and if that’s case, it’s a good thing he doesn’t kiss and tell because no one wants to hear about that.

“We just hung out for a while.”

Translation: We made out, with our clothes on, and that’s about it. Nothing extracurricular went on, but there is potential for more. The night went well but didn’t end up with what every guy wants: sex.

“I had the best night last night. All I have to say is it ended with the craziest sex.”

Translation: Any guy that says he had the best sex, most adventurous night, or anything like that is completely lying. All this means is he hooked up with her, got pretty far, but still went to bed unfinished. Conversations are graphic, but no one starts them off like this who is telling the truth.

NOTE: While these are always lies, they do lead to the best conversations. Listening to your friend try to make up a night and think of kinky stuff is always hilarious and how most conversations go.

“The night went well. I had a great time. She’s a really cool girl.”

Translation: Your friend blew it. He had her right where he wanted her and then messed up in the clutch.  Usually, this means they were in bed, ready to get it on,and he couldn’t seal the deal. Why? It’s different all the time, so when you hear this, press him about it so you can hear all about his humiliation.

The only way to know your friend went all the way is if he says it straight up. It’s a conversation ender right there. A simple description of the positions, the attractiveness of the girl, and minor details here and there lets the rest of the guys know he had sex. Until you hear this, you can know that your friend struck out. While these conversations aren’t nearly as fun as the ridicule that the other lines bring, it is the sure-tell sign your friend got laid.