He Said / She Said: Sex-tiquette

By Neal

I’m probably the last person on Earth who should be doling out advice on etiquette. I’ve been told that I’m ignorant, oblivious, and classless. But, I say “bless you” when someone sneezes, I hold the door open for women, men, children, animals, ghosts and I put the toilet seat down when I’m done pissing. Safe to say, my nickname’s not Mr. Manners, but I’m not completely untrained in the ways of common courtesy.

However, I still find it kind of weird to apply rules, regulations, policies, and restrictions on sex. If anything, sex should be a time to let loose, throw caution to the wind, and just enjoy yourself. When you get hung up on the little stuff, that’s when you miss out on the bigger picture. But, everyone has their limits, their boundaries, their red flags, their pet peeves.

I once had a chick who was into scratching. I thought I was going to die. A friend of mine said his hook up wanted him to choke her. Another lady wanted to be tied up. Different strokes for different folks, I guess. I hate to be the guy telling what you should and shouldn’t do when plowing some prime real estate, but I feel like if I didn’t and you crossed a line then I’m the bad guy. Truth is, if you want to continue securing repeat p*ssy, you have to be somewhat aware or mindful of your partner. What works for you might not work for her. I know, if only every hook up could be your masturbation fantasy come to life, but unless you’re Hugh Hefner or Ryan Gosling or proud wrangler of a submissive, it’ll remain a fantasy.

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