Puck Him Up: The Greatest Hockey Fights Ever [VIDEO]

December 16, 2010 Posted in Cool Stuff, Features, Funny Stuff, hockey, Hockey - NHL, homepage, Lists, Painful, Sports, Video

By Jameseldred

What’s the old joke, “I went to a boxing match and a hockey game broke out?” Casual hockey fans and die-hards alike can agree, the best thing about hockey is the fact that at any time two players (or entire teams) might drop gloves and just start beating the everloving crap out of each other, and the refs will let them do it! So get your copies of Slap Shot ready and check your false teeth. Here are some of the best hockey fights of all time.

Russian Hockey Fight

In Russia ice fight on the players! No, just kidding, the players beat the shit out of each other there too. In this massive brawl, everyone from both teams just give up all pretense of a genuine hockey match and turn the match into the Royal Rumble on ice.

Osgood vs. Roy

Is there anything in this world greater than a long, slow, stupid as hell goalie fight? I don’t think so. The best thing about a goalie fight is that you know they both have to really want it. To skate across the entire rink and take off enough gear to be able to throw punches at each other, thats a lot of work.

Boston Bruins vs. Montreal Canadiens

The Bruins hate Montreal…

Boston Bruins vs. Quebec Nordiques

…and Quebec…

Boston Bruins vs New York City

..Okay…the Bruins just hate everyone. But hey, if you can’t beat ‘em on the scoreboard, might as well beat the crap out of everyone else.

St. Louis Blues vs. Chicago Blackhawks – 1991

Every single player on the ice goes to blows in this St. Patrick’s Day fight. Maybe they were drinking beforehand?

Philadelphia Flyers vs. Ottowa Senators

If a fight can be judged by the number of gloves and helmets on the ground, than this two-part brawl between the Flyers and the Senators might just be the greatest brawl of all time. It starts out as a duel between Bashear and Ray, but it violence quickly spreads until the rink is transformed into a ice-coated wrestling ring.

Calgary Flames vs. Fans

Boston doesn’t have a monopoly when it comes to beating the snot out of their opposing team’s fans. But you can hardly fault them. The fan totally started it. He deserved to get beaten into a coma for squirting water at the bench!

Darren McCarty vs Claude Lemieux

Lemieux kicked cancer’s ass and went back to hockey, so a few dozen haymakers to the head aren’t going to stop him. These two seemed to go at it a lot.

Dennis Vial vs Rob Ray

Some fights are slow-burning brawls that start kind of quiet before boiling over into full-fledged fisticuffs. Then there are fights that are like nitro. This is one of the later. Its less than 20 seconds long, but the punch-per-second count is epic. These two went at it a lot. Seriously. A lot.

Tie Domi vs. Ulf Samuelsson

Choosing your favorite Tie Domi fight choosing your favorite child or stripper or stripper child, you want to love them all equally. But this sucker punch stands out amongst the rest. It stood out for the NHL as well, as they suspended the legendary enforcer eight games for it.

Asian Hockey Fight

They have hockey in Asia? I didn’t even know they had ice there! Sadly, there are no kung fu kicks in this crazy fracas from the Far East, although there’s a great blindside about 25 seconds in that would make Jet Li proud.

Plymouth Whalers vs London Knights

The Whalers and the Knights are two teams in the Canadian Hockey League. A minor league for players aged 16 to 20. Nice to see that they start them off young in Canada. With fighting skills like these, its hard to imagine that any of these players didn’t go pro.