Anatomy of the Bar Scene

You know the deal: You walk in. You see a bunch of peeps, take in the old tap stench and after a few hours, you bounce.  Sometimes you had fun.  Sometimes you wish you’d gone somewhere else.

It’s time to take matters into your own hands.  Why learn about the anatomy of a girl if you can’t even get near it.  You need the Anatomy of the Bar Scene.  Because there are only so many nights you can waste on a lame party.

The Entrance

Great for eying prospects and gauging the night’s potential, it’s the P.O.D (point of decision-making).  One New York club promoter said if crowd is lame (read: too many guys and the girls suck), leave immediately.  Call me an optimist but I say feel it out.  If nothing else, you can warm up your approach on off-targets. But have two to 65 places in mind for backup within the vicinity.  If you’re still not feeling it, bounce to Plan B.

At the Bar

Guys should generally let girls have a seat at the bar, but if you are seated, do so with your body facing slightly outward so you seem more approachable.  Girls need a signal to be able to come order between you and your bud, and know that she’s not distracting you from the game.  Be visible, openly joking with friends, or dancing.  If you’re passive, you’re ignored.

Move Around or Stay Put?

Girls tend to stay put and send signals of whether to approach them.  You should take a spin around and get a feel for the prospects.  If someone catches your eye, stay put and work out an approach.  But if you keep walking past that girl who isn’t interested, you may feel awkward (especially if the place is small).  She’s not worth it and move on to someone who is.

Ladies Room Line

If you’re staying in one spot, make it en route to the ladies room.  On those never-ending queues, she’s forced to stand still and most likely impatiently so.  She may welcome a distraction from awkwardly waiting alone.  Just don’t “confuse her” for someone else; girls don’t like being mistaken for others – unless she looks like a celebrity.  In this approach, you’ll get a better look at her in that dark abyss of beer-soaked floors, and see how she measures up to your farsighted impression.

Safety in Numbers

Safe from girls, that is.  Big groups are loud and intimidating.  If you want to meet people, stay in smaller packs or deflect from your large group.  You’re sure to hear about “how many beers they drank” at some point of your life; you live with these people.  Tonight, it’s about expanding your circle.

Take Inventory

In a last-ditch effort before determining if the scene is beat, make it a numbers game.  Go with a friend and make a list of the top 3 to 5 girls you want to talk to.  Make it interesting by placing a wager of who can (1) get a number (2) a hook-up OR (3) not get slapped.  Then just go for it.

Tim Ferriss, game-changing author of the book “The 4-Hour Workweek”, said everyone should ask someone of the opposite sex for their number every day.  Even if you’re married, do it and tear it up after.  It’s about overcoming fears, not getting some girl.

In a numbers-driven world, if you can’t use anatomy, you’ll get the business of the pick up.

Who says you’ll never use what you learned in college?