Ultimate Ibiza: Coed Invading Ibiza AGAIN in 2010

Get on Hiroshi's VIP list! See the Directions at the End.

We”re Going To Ibiza!” Yes, it’s back to Ibiza for Coed Magazine in 2010!

Are you ready for the ultimate Party vacation?! Ibiza is life changing, a religious experience – it’s like Mecca for “Househeads”.  Newbies start talking about their next trip back before leaving the island, while for Ibiza Alumni it’s impossible to walk into a hotspot anywhere else in the world the same way again – ever.

Nobody goes to Ibiza to sit still.  Arrive well rested because you’re about to experience the hottest day and nightlife in the world.  Ibiza is like a genie – a sexy, submissive, scantily clad genie at your beck and call.  Your wish is her command and she lives solely to make your craziest dreams and wildest fantasies a bass thumping, fist pumping reality.

Never been . . .read on

The mild weather is warm and comfortable throughout the season but expect to see some of the hottest women anywhere on the planet, and like the island itself they’re so ripe and in season. Polish your game, shape up and dress your best – it’s Wabbit Season. Whether your daytime is a wild day party or snoozing and relaxing at the legendary Café Del Mar meeting new friends is a given.  So can couples visit Ibiza?

Don’t let your idiot friend persuade you with that moronic, “Sand to the Beach” nonsense (he’s not staying single for the chicks, he’s a closet half fag watching the wrong partner during internet porn – Jim you’re supposed to imagine you’re getting the head, not giving it.)  Bringing a girlfriend is actually a fantastic idea (a girlfriend that you’re already strongly “Involved” with sexually – do not bring an “If”.  We’re not in the “I hope” business!  If you’re unsure, bring her for a coffee – not a $5,000 vacation – dude I’m effin serious.  Do not discount this advice). The vibe on the island is peace and love and you will have no issues bringing your girl to the wild parties in the clubs.  In addition, the island oozes sexuality, and a savvy player can cultivate the mix of sexy, party, sun and alcohol into a game raising sexual experience for all.  The pomp & circumstance that accompanied the hour long romp with my girl was akin to an Olympic ceremony – I swear I even heard that music they play as they raise the banners (btw -I gave her the Gold, and I’m considering the Winter Olympics in Aspen).

Sunset at the Lengendary Cafe Del Mar Makes Me Hear Angels Cry.

After a long day at the beach you’ll have plenty of time to recharge your batteries because dinner is around midnight and the clubs start pumping at 2:00 AM, but of course you could get there earlier if your over anxious. Where you’re heading depends mostly upon which night of the week it is  Check out Ministry of Sounds Ibiza Iphone app – we found it awesome. Btw – An iphone, TomTom or something GPS is a great idea as the locals tend to give directions like, “Go down that road for 15 minutes and turn left at a big tree.”

House Music is Everywhere

For househeads the island is Shangri-La.  Everywhere you turn you’ll hear either mellow jazzy house grooves or chest pounding, bone shaking bass. Over a season expect to see every significant member of house music royalty visit the island, many of whom will have complete season residencies.  Furthermore, they come to Ibiza as if they’re playing in the “Big Game” so you don’t get a phoned in set at a standard venue that scraped together a few shekels to finally bring in some talent.   The superstars come here to throw it down! It’s quite common that the sets they unfold in Ibiza over the summer are the originals that will be become the toned downed club sets played on tour the other 9 months of the year.

Amazing, what further punctuates the atmosphere for the members of the cult of funk is that house music is everywhere.  Cabs, restaurants, shops, rental cars, hotels – they play it on the bus – which incidentally is called the “Disco Bus.”  I told you, Heaven for househeads.

Into the Night

Superclubs abound!  A veritable pantheon of nightclub legends, you’d need a time machine to see more super clubs than a trip to Ibiza.  Amnesia, Space, Jet, Es Paradis’, Eden, Privelidge – your cup runneth over!

Superclub Es Paradis’ It Actually Rains in this Club during their “Fiesta Del Agua” Party

What you can expect once inside the clubs depends upon your pocket and your attitude toward the natives.  Either one can get you some extra attention, but if your bring both you’re going to live large.  Shaking hands and kissing babies with everyone we met day and night yielded free drink passes, free admissions, 2 for 1s and valuable inside info on various venues.  The waiters in the small café’s and the small shop keeper were particularly helpful (one going so far as to give us the name of his friend that worked the door at Es Paradis’ which saved us an hour wait line!)

Club entry fees will run you $30 euro to $150 euro for a major event at one of the superclubs.  Drinks aren’t cheap in the big clubs either with beers running around 12 Euro and cocktails can go to 19e.  Prices for VIP areas such as reserved seating and table service might be higher on a per drink basis, but the move is Bottle Service.  You’ll get right in, get a table with a semi-private area, have enough booze to film three girls gone wild videos and the room to stretch out like Rick James on Eddie Murphy’s couch.  As Ferris Bueller says, “If you have the means, I recommend it.”

Pacha – Ibiaza’s Original

Pacha is where it all began and is considered to be the foremost club and party place.

The Main Room in Pacha is Spiritual Journey for Househeads

This is where the Masters throw down!  Mr. “F*** Me I’m Famous” himself spins here.  So does, the incredible duo of Dubfire and Sharam known as Deep Dish, Frankie Knuckles, and a list of DJ dignitaries too long to continue. , as well as 7 different theme nights with different themes. Three visits to Pacha on our last trip yielded two entirely different set ups inside (apparently they have movable /reposition-able interior walls – or maybe I was just too wrecked to realize WTF was going on – who knows).

It doesn’t end with Pacha though.   Space, Amnesia and Es Paradis’ are huge super clubs with thousands of revelers on any given night in season. I also recommend DC10 and of course Privilege is an absolute must.

Who’s Coming With Me?

I leave you now with my version of the Gladiator speech in a a modest attempt (however feeble) to build the Coed Army, with which to take Ibiza (and a few other places) by storm.  We’ve always got something to give away around here (Ahem . . .This is a Vacation article – hint hint), so send me your email and contact info and sooner or later I’ll hit you up with some free swag, VIP Invites or other tchotchke, bric-a-brac, knick knack item.  Brothers, Strength & Honor.

Who’s Coming With Me?

I leave you now with my version of the Gladiator speech in a a modest attempt (however feeble) to build the Coed Army, with which to take Ibiza (and a few other places) by storm.  We’ve always got something to give away around here (Ahem . . .This is a Vacation article – hint hint), so send me your email and contact info and sooner or later I’ll hit you up with some free swag, VIP Invites or other tchotchke, bric-a-brac, knick knack item.  Brothers, Strength & Honor.

Five months from now, I will be in Ibiza.

Imagine where you will be, and it will be so.

Hold the line! Stay with me!

If you find yourself alone… riding in green fields

with the sun on your face… do not be troubled.

For you are in The Cafe Del Mar,

and you’re already drunk!

Brothers, what we do in Ibiza…

. . .echoes in eternity.

Now whose coming with me?

To Get on Hiroshi’s VIP and Goody List send an email to GrooveRobot@teamcoed.com

Make sure you include your Email address in the mail full name, full address, age and phone, in that order on separate lines .