Could “The Expendables” Be The Best Action Movie Ever?
May 29, 2009 by Steve - Seton Hall
Most cynical movie buffs would say no, but I say yes!
Arnold Schwarzenegger, Mickey Rourke, Jason Statham, Sylvester Stallone, Jet Li, Ivan Drago Dolph Lundgren, Steve Austin and Randy Couture are a team of mercenaries who head to South America on a mission to overthrow a dictator.
As soon as I hear written and directed by Sylvester Stallone my ears perk up. Then you throw in the action movie hall of fame cast listed above is a winning formula alone.
I would have liked to see Steven Segal, Jean Claude Van Damme, and Chuck Norris added to the list but why get greedy.
Sure this movie probably won’t win an Oscar, but the body count will be ridiculously high and your balls might explode from a surge of testosterone.
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I am sorry – though Steve and I will get SO MUCH shit for this in the office – this will be one of the greatest movies ever made.
If only they added: Pre-Cancer-Swayze (Point Break Swayze, not faggotty-shit Dirty Dancing Swayze), Jean Claude (Bloodsport JC) and Cock-Puncher Segal – this would beat out LOTR as the greatest film ever made.
Statham does NOT deserve to be in this movie! The rest are B-movie masters, and Statham made the gayest remake of Robin Hood ever. Not since Costner has Robin Hood seemed so gay.
lack of black IMO, needs:
- Bob Sapp
- Tommy ‘Tiny’ Lister
- Karl Malone
- Terry Tate
- Denzel Washington
Every movie needs Terry Tate.
Terry Crews is in it. That is a lot of black.