5 Creepy Motivational Speakers

Motivational speakers are professional speakers whose words are intending to lift up and motivate their audiences. People pay good money to hear these successful speakers (mostly successful because people pay good money to see them). But there’s something really Scientology-like creepy about motivational speakers. Is it the creepy things they say through their mouth of way-too white teeth?

Here’s the top 5 creepiest and the crazy fortune cookie who-ha they have to say:

1) Wayne Dyer

Famously regarded as the ‘Father of Motivation,’ he made it popular to hug other men. In this clip, he hits on Ellen, which is even creepier, but his whole ‘love the world and it will love you back’ crap is a little too 1960′s hippie for us.

Creepy motivational who-ha: “Anything you really want, you can attain, if you really go after it.”

2) Tony Robbins

Man, his teeth are huge! With the millions he makes around the world, you would think he could fix those things. At about 6’5, Robbins can scare you into motivation but even he admits he is “a crazy mo-fo!”

Creepy motivational who-ha: There is no such thing as failure. There are only results.

3) Matt Foley

Disheveled, overweight, and unstylish, the comic motivational speaker performed by Chris Farley, would yell, disparage, display cynicism, and give a clearly negative motivational message. If only there were more REAL motivational speakers like Matt, the COED office wouldn’t be in a van down by the river.

Creepy motivational who-ha: “Whoop-dee-freakin-doo!”

4) Zig’ Ziglar

In 1970, he went into the motivational speaker business, incorporating that happy marriage of his strong Christian values into his enthusiastic speaking. All of those things considered, he is now probably picking up 18 year old boys in airport bathrooms across the country.

Creepy motivational who-ha: If you don’t see yourself as a winner, then you cannot perform as a winner.

5) Dan Millman

Author of thirteen self-help books, the most famous, Way of the Peaceful Warrior. Also, the winner of the 1964 World Trampoline Championship. His former clients include Jimmy Carter, who drove the country into one of the worst recessions ever, and Jerry Garcia, who outsmoked death for years after he should have been declared dead.

Creepy motivational who-ha: “Everything you’ll ever need to know is within you; the secrets of the universe are imprinted on the cells of your body. But you haven’t learned how to read the wisdom of the body”