7 Things I Learned Working on a Pot Farm
For the stoner sect, working on a pot farm must seem like the equivalent of a fat person winning one of those contests where they get to stuff their shopping cart with as much food as they can in one minute. But I–your faithful blogger—have actually worked on a pot farmer in Mendocino County (part of the Emerald Triangle) and the fantasy isn’t always the same as the reality. So here are 7 truths and fictions about working on a pot farm:
There is a shitload of weed on a farm: TRUE!
You better believe it. Bushels and bushels of freshly trimmed weed stacked to the ceiling, with exotic names as Trainwreck and Purple Indica.
The local police are always ready to bust a pot farm. FALSE!
In Mendocino the local police aren’t concerned about the weed that is grown in the area. If they busted all the farms, that would crash the local economy. What they are more worried about is robbery. Gangs from L.A. have come to this area armed with AK47s to rob farms of their weed because it’s so profitable and abundant.
It’s easy to find a pot farm to work on in San Francisco. FALSE!
I had one pot farm scheduled to work on and the night before leaving I got an email that the DEA swooped down and took all their plants. Other times people were really flaky on when I should be going up (“Oh, dude? Was that today!?”)
When eating is involved on a pot farm, it gets very quiet. TRUE!
As much food production (sandwiches, etc) goes on as weed production, followed by moments when all you hear is chewing.
It’s fun to trim weed. FALSE!
Trimming weed is one of the most monotonous tasks known to humanity. All day long you sit shaping buds over a garbage bag with a pair of scissors and rubber glove on your hand. If this were perfectly legal I’m sure this job would pay $7.50 an hour. Instead, trimmers are paid $100 per each pound of weed they trim.
People who work on pot farms really, really, really like pot. TRUE!
It couldn’t be more ideal. They can trim weed and smoke it ALL AT THE SAME TIME! Not only that, but they can do so while listening to hippie music ABOUT weed and centering ALL conversation – like wine snobs – around, well, weed.
There’s nothing scary about a pot farm. FALSE!
You have that combustible mixture of paranoia and fear of being robbed while stuck in the middle of a wooded nowhere. Late at night every little noise can trigger the fear that the gangs from L.A. have arrived to rob the place at gunpoint, or the DEA has swooped down to bust everyone in sight. Yay, weed!
Crazy Ass Soccer Dad Tries To Pull Son Off Field Because Of His Grades!
PHOTO: This is borderline illegal
Mind the gap [40 pics]
Please take it off…
12 Steaks (Naturally!) in the Shape of Other Things
Billy the Blind Kid in "Dumb and Dumber" 'MEMBA HIM?!
OMG, this should be illegal [Photos]
I think you have a perfectly shaped side bewb.
17 Things That Irritate Girls About Guys
The sexiest women in America is...
If you like girls in bikinis
18 Images You Won't Believe Aren't Photoshopped
Who Has Got the Luckiest Job in the Entire World?
Girls in the grass
Awkward celebrity yearbook photos (21 Photos)
This sexiness feels naughty…
Kimmy – that's awesome.
I'm in Harvard right now, with a 3.9 GPA and on the weekends I manage a multimillion dollar financing company that averages around 4.2 Million a year. I smoke pot 3 times a day from a diamond-encrusted platinum bong with Alyssa Milano rubbing my back. That Johnny guy is totally wrong, and I'm definitely proving his stereotype wholly ignorant by making unsubstantiated claims about my own life from behind a pseudonym.
Seems that chronic chronic abuse induces grand delusions where incomes are concerned. Keep smoking though your keeping underworld organizations alive and well armed. No need for you to worry about all the innocent victims of drive-byes and horrendous music like that of the Grateful Dead.
dont smoke- dont care- all i know from what i’ve seen, and trust me, im the only person i know who doesn’t smoke, is that there are people who do well, and people who are freaks about weed, its the freaks who do terribly, everyone does fine…. as for me? i dont even want to try getting addicted, addictions are expensive
i know from experience
Photoshopped!
The pixels are all wrong. Plus, I’ve been around and seen my fair share of ‘shops.
I smoke hella weed, hella! Daily smoker for sure.
I made about $200k last year. As to why I am here posting? I own an Internet company and I am on this biatch most all day, everyday. Followed a link from Digg.
Now excuse me while I take another rip from the bong and count my cash :)
so this Johnny guy would rather have “real drugs”….you know something that is highly processed and has a very high addiction risk as well as the possibility of death….ALCOHOL, really? alcohol effects a persons function an extraordinarily more than weed.. and your an idiot to want to die by doin a “real drug” rather than you know have people get along and be happy..
Is it just me or does his thumb look really weird in that picture?
Judge dread has no clue what he's talking about,really! So let forget about him. I have learned from personal experience that to much weed can demotivate a person over time if smoked on a daily basis but only if that person allows it to happen. Don't just sit around and do nothing because that's the trap, one needs to be productive and self motivated to accomplish something whilst being a stoner/pothead or regular smoker. And as for my grammar, English is my second language so forgive me I'm South African (No I'm not black).
Peace out
420
@ “judge dread”
weed does not cause drive byes. people cause drive byes. weed does not go and choose to kill someone, stupid gangsters (nigs and mexicans mostly) choose to kill people.
I do not understand why people keep posting about how well they are doing regarding their lives and weed. Johnny is long gone. I stumbled-upon this entry, like many of you have and I am a little upset by how this was handled. My first instinct was to prove them wrong by talking about my GPA and the amount of weed I smoke, but do you really think they care? These people have their own views and we have ours. Take the high road, my friends (no pun intended). I do not know if you all actually make this much money or not, but I know from experience that it is quite possible to be successful while smoking on a daily basis. Bragging about how much you make with poor grammar just makes all of us look bad. While Judge Dread is right about the violence, his point is poorly made and generally he looks pretty lame for taking digs at others.
YEAH MAN i smoke weed 10 times a day man and i make 2 billion dollars a year man no bullshit at all!!!
1/3 of all car accidents are caused by people high on weed…. this means 2/3 of all accidents are caused by people who are not high on weed! think about it it boggles the mind
TBH. I can guarantee 99 if not 100% of the posters saying they make 70k, 100k, 200k, or what ever jokes quota are tripped out high school kids that would shit a brick in front of a police officer.
EL oh EL.
Johnny, i smoke pot and i used to wash dishes but i quit. and now all i do is smoke pot. so youre wrong
johnny your rite, every pot head i have ever met has been a complete tosser. the worst thing about it is they go on about how good it is. they treat it like it is a religion and act just like it. they are for ever trying to get you to smoke it or eat it ei: you are at a party and there is someone next to you who just rolled one no sooner has it been light it is shoved in your face" want a blow,NO THANKS MATE, go on try it, go on you will like it, NO , fuck what's wrong with you man every one dose it." everyone dose not do it.I smoke cigarettes i never shove it into someone and demand that they try it. and you clowns that say you are in a well paid job FUCK OFF.
Yo Johnny…
Let's get a couple of things straight here. I smoke weed every day of my life and work full time at Warner Brothers making more money than you would like to think. Yes, I will admit it drains on the motivation aspect of things, but really, you'd have to be a lazy unmotivated person in the first place to not realize you've been washing dishes your whole life.
Well, I did washed dishes as a teenager though, but that was only for a little while so I could afford my blunts.
Yo Yo Yo Let me get something straight.. i just won the lotto 3 years ago and i did not know what to do with the $874,000 that came along, so i decided to hit the bong for the first time in my life since i don´t need a job any more.. i can´t tell if it was right or wrong desicion but my life is waaaaaay better than the poor ¨to hell with ganja and other drugs that make you a loser thinking¨ guy that i hired to do my dishes clean of my munchies… i hope it is not you lil johnny..
is it about money or is it about ideals? we may never know
I don't know what good you guys do defending weed like that. In my country drug dealers pay for organized crime. So i'm not interested in what weed or alcohol or anything does to your health or not. It's YOUR health and i don't care.
But covering weed like that, encouraging people? what a shame.
Gimme a break Lilly. In your country- it doesn't fuckin' matter because it's different here. I don't care where you come from but it's not where he's talking about, then shut up. "What a shame"? Fuck you.
Have a nice day to everyone else.
Also- Johnny is a dick.