Bullsh*t: 25 States Trying To Ban ‘Sparks Red’

At Seton Hall University the pre-game drink of choice is Sparks! Mmmm, just looking at pictures of the Sparks’ orange can makes my mouth water.

To the displeasure of America’s youth 25 US Senators (including New Jersey’s) are looking to rain on Sparks’ fan’s parade by banning the new Sparks Red. They feel the 8-percent alcohol by volume content of Sparks Red may be dangerous to students health and have called on producer MillerCoors to nix its release.

“I think this is bull sh*t,” says one pissed off Seton hall student. “I love the taste of Sparks and it’s a different kind of drunk. My friends and I usually pound 1-2 Sparks before hitting the bars as a pre-game because it ups the energy level. I’ve never ever blacked out while drinking Sparks. If I want to black out I certainly won;t drink Sparks Red, I’d leave that duty to a 1/2 bottle of Jack.”

Is 8-percent Sparks Red too much to handle?