No matter how good you are at getting a girl in the sack, chances are you have jack on these legends of the bedroom. With little black books thicker than a great sequoia, these seven men didn’t just chase tail, they hoarded it by the thousands and landed their names in the history books along the way. When you’re this much of a man-slut, it’s hard not to feel a little special – not that we’re saying they’re heroes, but we’re kind of thinking we should.

Check out the Top 7 Man-Sluts of All Time after the jump!

7. Ron Jeremy: 3,000-4,000

Some would say it’s unfair to include a porn star on a list like this–something about amateur vs professional–but with around 1,600 films under his belt, The Hedgehog definitely can backup all the notches on his belt. And what you have to remember is that he wouldn’t be where he is today without bringing the “skills”. Saying he doesn’t make the list would be like saying Lebron James hasn’t scored a basket since joining the NBA.

6. Gene Simmons: 4,600

Dudes in bands get laid. All of them. And when you’re in one of the most famous bands on the planet–and known for having a gigantic tongue–it’s only a matter of time before you break some kind of record. The only thing that could stop you is if you get married, but give Ol’ Gene a break. After that much rocking and that much booty, I’m surprised he’s still alive.

5. Charlie Sheen: 5,000

When you’re addicted to sex and you have women throwing themselves at you and enough money to fuel your insatiable hooker habit, it doesn’t take much to make top 5 man-sluts. That is until you go and f**k up your relationship with Dennis Richards. The 5,000 lays might not feel quite so free these days in the Sheen household, but they’re still just as sweet.

4. Umberto Billo: 8,000

We didn’t know who the hell this dude is either, but apparently the former porter for the Venetian hotel and casino had women flying to Vegas from all over the world to feel the magic that is Umberto. Before getting fired for “not being able to carry guest’s bags” from exhaustion, he’s said to have bagged up to four tourists a night. If you can get that kind of trim being a bell boy, I obviously have been pursing the wrong career.

3. Wilt Chamberlain: 20,000

Let’s get something straight, in order to rack up a list this long you have to be a seriously smooth motherf**ker. That, and you basically have to screw everything around you that moves to even have enough time in the day for a feat of this magnitude. Sure, it helps that he was one of the greatest players of all time and had women throwing themselves at his 7-foot 1-inch frame like frisbees. But still, this is amazing.

2. Castro: 35,000

A new documentary says the Cuban head-of-state has broken the known-record with 35,000 ladies in the bag. Not fair. If you’re a dictator, you get to just sit around and have people deliver women to you like room service. It’s not like you have to have any special skills or, ahem, attributes to rake in that many women–they’re all too afraid of you to do a damn thing about it. If I had an entire freakin’ military at my disposal to help the cause, I could have 35,000 women, too. Maybe…

1. Genghis Khan: Too Many to Count

However, if you are the biggest badass in the history of badasses, conquer half the damn world and are the head of the largest dynasty of all time, you deserve a little somthin’-somethin’ every, say, 15-20 minutes, whether you’re a sweet talker or not. This dude had so much sex, 8-percent of greater Asia is related to him with 16 million direct descendants. That only counts the one’s he got pregnant. Nobody’s sure what that means in terms of number of women, but when you’ve also killed as many people as Genghis Khan killed, there’s got to be a few that are unaccounted for, that’s all I’m sayin’.