Walk It Off, Version 2.0

Lower back pains? Knees bothering you? Weak ankles? The solution to your problems may not be more padding, healing salves or the latest miracle supplement. The answer you’ve been looking for could be a good run. Your little league baseball coach may have been on to something when he told you to, “Walk if off.”

It’s not just running any way you want though, this is a very special, secret running style that only I can teach you. So listen to what I have to say and then get off your fat ass and go for a jog.

I discovered the magical, healing powers of this kind of running about a year ago when I realized I was getting fat.

In high school I played two sports and never gave a second thought about what I ate or how much exercise I got. Then I went to college and worked out when I felt like it, played intramural sports with friends and still didn’t give any real thought to my health. I was such a good American it’s ridiculous. After I turned 21 and started to frequent the bar scene I noticed a soft pudgy ring forming around my waist. Who knew drinking four days a week and not working out could do that?

Needless to say, I didn’t like the new development and vowed to do something about it. I got my newly enlarged ass in gear and started running in the morning before class. It seemed like a pretty simple solution and it was great until my knees started to hurt everyday.

I looked into supplements to regenerate joint tissue, shoe inserts and ice for relief, but nothing made the pain stop. They all helped relieve it a little, but it was always there in the background. That’s when I learned an ancient Mexican Indian running secret that made everything better. It’s mind blowing in its simplicity. Are you ready?

The way to stop all those annoying little injuries, aches and pains is to run on your toes.

I know this sounds like a crock of sh*t, or too simple to be a breakthrough but there’s actually science to back me up, and it has spawned a cult following in running circles. Everyone thinks Kenyans are good runners, and they are, but they don’t hold a candle to the Tarahumara Indians of Mexico.

The Tarahumara still live largely traditional lifestyles—I mean some of them still live in caves—but they have revolutionized the distance running game. These people hold competitions between villages that can last for days—continuous running for multiple marathons in length. They rarely suffer any injuries and many compete well past the age of 50 or 60.

To make these running feats even more impressive the Tarahumara run in sandals with soles made from old tires, tied to their feet with leather strips. They don’t use any modern technology and they’re generally much healthier than many professional athletes; according to research it’s due to their running form.

Comfortable, padded running shoes are designed for people who land on their heels. The brunt of the impact is absorbed by bones— in your ankles, knees and hips—and decreases the strength of many small stabilizer muscles. This damages cartilage and can lead to a lot of pain.

By landing on your toes with every step the strain is taken away from bones and placed on muscles and tendons instead; which are designed to act as shock absorbers. This strengthens all those tiny muscles and keeps your joints healthier for much longer.

The Tarahumara also take smaller, faster strides when they run. Their feet never land farther forward than their hips, this also takes a lot of strain off of their knees and hips. The easiest way to duplicate these kinds of strides is to run uphill. The incline forces you to land on your toes, and it doesn’t let you step too far forward, unless you’re trying to fall on your ass. So, to convert your running style to match the Tarahumara, run up a hill to learn the motion, and then replicate it on flatland.

I’d also recommend keeping the first couple weeks of running on the shorter side—I kept mine between three and five miles. It’s going to take your body some time to develop the muscles you’ve been ignoring for so long—hopefully your calves will never be this sore again, but the few days of pain are definitely worth it. My knees stopped hurting within a couple of weeks, and I haven’t had any problems since. It now feels wrong to run any other way.

Who knew we could learn so much about exercise from a people who are famous for siestas in oversized sombreros?