Alternative WNBA Publicity Stunts

As many of you heard, last night there was a “fight” in a WNBA game that looked about as real as a WWE wrestling match – we’re not the only one to make the case that this was a publicity stunt used to draw attention into the “intensity” of the sport.

Since the WNBA is now implementing circus like publicity stunts to draw attention to the league, we’ve decided to give them some more suggestions to help them up their fan base.

Check out Alternative WNBA Publicity Stunts after the jump!

Lauren Jackson “Topless Tuesdays”

At first we thought it would be cool if there was a topless Tuesday promotion night where the games would be played topless by all the players, but then we realized 6’6” pro-athletes running around half-naked probably isn’t as cool as it sounds.

Instead, go with Lauren Jackson “Topless Tuesday” nights. Lauren Jackson was the MVP of the WNBA in 2007, and is best known for having having a topless photo shoot. The girl is a babe and having her dominate other players on the court without a shirt on would definitely draw new viewers. In fact she doesn’t even need to do it fully topless, we’d settle for an SI Swimsuit Issue-esque painted-on jersey.

Sheryl Swoopes Half Time Wrestling

Also known as the “Michael Jordan of the WNBA” (because there always has to be a “Michael Jordan of the…” for everything) Sheryl Swoopes is a beast. The WNBA would pack the stands if they had Sheryl Swoopes Half Time Wrestling night at least once a week.

Opponent suggestions include: King Kong Bundy, Andre the Giant’s corpse, Verne Troyer’s penis, Artie The Strongest Man… In The World”, Christian Bale, and . Quinton “Rampage” Jackson.

Fill The Court With Jello

As you know from COED’s Ode to Jell-O Wrestling, guys love girls flopping around in jell-O.

Although it would make running up and down the court difficult and could lead to injuries of high-profile players, the benefits out-weigh the negatives.

Playboy Bunny Sixth Man

The WNBA and Playboy should team up to have a guest sixth man for each team. Of course, the sixth man would be a Playboy bunny dressed in a cute, skimpy pastel colored WNBA jersey and short-shorts.

Although the sixth (wo)man wouldn’t provide any basketball talent to the game whatsoever, it doesn’t really matter; the male dominated crowd would just be watching the bunny–and the level of play in the WNBA is piss poor anyway.

Replace WNBA Players With 7 Foot Black Guys

NASCAR had its first crossover star in Danica Patrick and The Ice Box player with the guys in Little Giants. I’ll pull out the sexism card and say it’s about time the WNBA open it’s doors to male athletes.

Once this barrier is broken and the first male star dominates against the ladies, rating will jump and the team owners will begin full their rosters with guys. Although this essentially takes away the entire point of the league, would that really be such a bad thing?