Some of the most important people in history have graduated from Harvard, so with one phone call, these Ivy-Leaguers can book who ever they want–leaving the rest of us with speakers like Big Bird (Villanova’s 2004 speaker) to carry out the graduation commencement. Let’s see what the rest of us have been missing.

Check out Harvard’s long list of cool commencement speakers after the jump.

Harvard Class of 2008 Commencement Speaker: J.K. Rowling

J.K. Rowling is the author of the popular Harry Potter fantasy series. Forbes ranked Rowling as the 48th most powerful celebrity of 2007, and Time magazine named her as a runner-up for its 2007 “Person of the Year.”

Harvard Class of 2007 “Class Day” Speaker: Bill Clinton

Clinton was the 42nd President of the United States, serving from 1993 to 2001 and left office with an approval rating at 65%–the highest end-of-office rating of any President since World War II. Oh yeah, and he got a BJ in the Oval Office, and was impeached.

Harvard Class of 2006 “Class Day” Speaker: Seth McFarlane

McFarlane is a two-time Emmy-winning American comedian best known as the creator of the popular FOX animated series “Family Guy” and “American Dad.”

Watch Seth McFarlane’s “Class Day” speech

Harvard Class of 2005 Commencement Speaker: John Lithgow

While attending Harvard, John Lithgow lived in the same dorm as Al Gore and Tommy Lee Jones. He graduated Magna Cum Laude from the University in 1967.

Harvard Class of 2004 Commencement Speaker: Kofi Annan

Kofi Annan, a Ghanaian diplomat, served as the seventh Secretary-General of the United Nations from January 1, 1997 to January 1, 2007, serving two five-year terms. Annan was the co-recipient of the Nobel Peace Prize in 2001, and all around good guy.

Harvard Class of 2002 “Class Day” Speaker: Al Franken

Al Franken is an Emmy Award–winning American comedian/politician, noted for his work on Saturday Night Live and his liberal political views. Franken announced his candidacy for the 2008 United States Senate election in Minnesota as a member of the Democratic-Farmer-Labor Party, which will select its candidate in the 2008 Minnesota primary on September 9, 2008.

Harvard Class of 2001 “Class Day” Speaker: Bono

In case you haven’t already heard, Bono is the lead singer of U2 and widely known for his activism in Africa and his organization of several benefit concerts and meetings with influential politicians. Bono has been nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize, was granted an honorary knighthood by the United Kingdom, and was named as a “Person of the Year” by Time. I, on the other hand, make a bitchin’ bloody Mary.

Harvard Class of 2000 “Class Day” Speaker: Conan O’Brien

O’Brien is an Emmy Award-winning American television host and comedian, best known as host of NBC’s Late Night with Conan O’Brien. In 2009, he is scheduled to replace Jay Leno as host of The Tonight Show. And assclown Jimmy Fallon is going to replace him as “Late Night” host. (WTF?!)

Conan O’Brien, Harvard Class of 2000 Commencement Address video

Harvard Class of 1996 “Class Day” Speaker: Tom Brokaw

Brokaw is an American television journalist and author who has hosted, wrote, and moderated special programs on a wide range of topics. Throughout his career, he has been the recipient of numerous awards and honors, including a Peabody, numerous Emmy awards, and honorary degrees from 16 different universities. Beat that!

Read Tom Brokaw’s “Class Day” speech

Harvard Class of 1994 Commencement Speaker: Al Gore

Gore was the forty-fifth Vice President of the United States, serving from 1993 to 2001, under President Bill Clinton. Gore was the Democratic nominee for president in the 2000 election, in which he won the popular vote but ultimately lost to Republican candidate George W. Bush.

A prominent environmental activist, Gore was awarded the 2007 Nobel Peace Prize (together with the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change). He also starred in the Academy Award-winning documentary on the topic of global warming, An Inconvenient Truth. In 2007, Gore helped to organize the July 7 benefit concert for global warming, Live Earth–which, in the end, totally F’ed up the earth.

Harvard Class of 1956 Commencement Speaker: John F. Kennedy

JFK was the thirty-fifth President of the United States, serving from 1961 until his assassination in 1963. He is often regarded as one of the best presidents in our nation’s history. And he got to bone Marilyn Monroe. So, he’s definitely the coolest.