COED’s Top Ten Drunk Foods

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Endless Simmer recently released their top ten list of Drunk College Foods, and after attending American University I am proud to say that I’ve eaten my fair share of Jumbo Slices after a long night of drinking in Adams Morgan.

While the list was great and serves as a great guide to late night eats when you’re visiting your friends at the universities mentioned, I think a more ‘universal’ top ten drunk foods is in order.

In no particular order, here is COED’s version of the Top Ten Drunk Eats.

10. Philly Cheesesteak from a 24-hour Diner – This delectable slice of heaven along with a Coke and hash browns is perfect for absorbing the excess alcohol you probably consumed all night long. All that grease really settles the stomach in a weird, unhealthy way.

9. Mini Tacos – Assuming your motor skills are intact, fire up a box of these babies and prepare for a fiesta in your stomach. But don’t eat them too fast!

8. Your Roommates Leftover Pizza – If your roommate who doesn’t go out ordered a pizza and still have some slices left over, spare the money and take a slice while he’s asleep. If he complains leave him $1.25 and the problems solved. (Note: Not all roommates are sympathetic to your drunken needs and might report you to the RA. So proceed with caution.)

7. Pretzels - The perfect complement to beer, before and after drinking it. ‘Nuff Said.

6. Steak and Eggs – Breakfast at 3am from your local diner.

5. Cheese Fries with Gravy – French Fries. Melted Cheese. Gravy. Need I say more? Once the fries are finished you can also dare the drunkest of your crew to chug the gravy.

4. Taco Bell – Assuming someone can still drive, Taco Bell is always up late. Just crank up the Scatman and hit the drive through.

3. Leftover Chinese Food – A classic, and consistently good.

2. Tostitos Chips and Salsa – They can be purchased almost anywhere that sells food, you don’t have to prepare them, and they’re just too damn good after a bender. Please note you will probably go through a whole bag and wind up with salsa all over yourself when you wake up.

And finally, the greasiest and cheesiest of them all:

1. Dominos Thin Crust Philly Cheese Steak Pizza – It’s Philly Cheese Steak on a Pizza – how could you not eat a whole pie in one sitting?

There you have it. Feel free to chip in some of your own ideas.

  • jimmyb says:

    what about white castle?!

  • dsuni says:

    white castle is if you have the munchies…

    in texas you can’t forget Whataburger’s taquitos…

    IHOP and their unlimited pancakes and they’re open 24hours (most)

  • Kelli says:

    grilled cheese or burritos

  • katy says:

    any breakfast food, preferably GeorgeWebbs if you’re in Wisconsin

  • Terry says:

    Denny’s! I was 28 before I ever went into a Denny’s sober.

  • poncho says:

    Street Tacos in Mexico and dont forget MENUDO Juanita is the best

  • boxeboxwell says:

    all great drunk foods…but nothing can beat the all-time greatest stand by- biscuits and gravy!

  • John says:

    All may be good but nothing beats any mexican food

  • Champus says:

    This is a crap list. Domino’s philly cheese steak pizza? Have you ever been to waffle house for hashbrowns? And what is your obsession with tacos? Stupid fuck. Ask a person who actually parties for the best drunk foods for some advice; and you damn sure won’t hear chips and salsa. Jesus Christ, I think it is best if you left the writing to people of the legal drinking age.

  • nana says:

    will ferrell sucks dog ass

  • sportster says:

    The St. Louis favorite is called a Slinger: two cheeseburger patties, covered with 2 eggs(anyway you want them), hashbrowns, and chili, onions and cheese are optional.

  • Larson says:

    I know it isn’t available nationwide, but here in the Midwest you have to add White Castles to that list.

  • wilford brimley says:

    What helps my diabetes is mile high fries @ the continental (philadelphia). French fries cut as thin as potato sticks covered in a horseradish mustard sauce.

  • madharry says:

    The best is the “donner kebab” always keep one under you’re pillow in case the drunk monster gets ya

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