Virginia Tech Settlement Package

By John

So let’s assume you’re dead, and your school f**ked up and allowed it to happen through a lack of planning and/or any security oversight whatsoever. (I know this is a far-fetched assumption, but stick with me.) Your family is all upset and sh*t over the fact that you’re not around anymore, and now they’re stuck with your student loans and credit card debt.

Instead of just “moving on” and trying to sell your Wii they decide to search for “answers.” Some families are POV’s looking to get paid, while others want to prevent this from happening again.

What do you think your school’s response would be?

For the Hokies, that answer came today. Offer the families $100K and the ability to ask a question to the administration and the governor. WOW…didn’t see that one coming! Families of the 32 killed would also receive medical, counseling expenses and a possibly-vintage Michael Vick jersey (not confirmed). The medical and counseling should have been a given, the $100K is a little insulting, but the permission to ask a question part – REALLY f**king insulting.

If the families are just looking to bank off their child’s death, ok – their choice, I won’t judge too badly. For the school to make their public offer, $100K and a Q&A session? THAT is pretty ballsy.

Here is the question:

What would your family’s price be to settle for your death?