What Guys Do Wrong In the Bedroom… According to a Girl

January 31, 2008 - 12:30 pm By Lauren - U Mich

I am 22 years old. I tend to be attracted to older men. And still, I find myself hooking up with men who have absolutely no clue what they are doing in bed.

I don’t mean little things, like being unable to unzip my dress with one hand, or getting all tangled in the sheets forcing us to pause the action in order to perform a rescue. Those little things I can overlook.

What I can’t overlook is a Law Student’s inability to last longer than 3 minutes. Or to figure out where on earth a woman’s clitoris is.

What is the problem here? Did these boys learn nothing from sex education? And what about common sense? I mean, come on, who ever thought pushing a girl’s head towards your nether regions was a good form of foreplay?

And, maybe I’m asking too much, but if a guy can take the SATs and get into college, shouldn’t he be able to figure out what is/is not an acceptable way to treat a woman’s nipples? I don’t bite your penis, why do you think it’s ok to gnash on my nips?

Apparently I am not the only one feeling this way. I don’t know who this person is, but they provide quite a thorough and honest list of everything men do wrong in the bedroom. Not only is the list complete, but it can be easily printed and handed out to any potential suitor. Score!

We clearly have a long way to go when it comes to teaching men the ways of looooove, but this little blog (written by a guy, no less!) is clearly a step in the right direction. Maybe they are catching on, albeit slowly. Maybe one day we will find men that last long, touch us softly, and make us breakfast in the morning. And maybe, just maybe by the time our daughters start bringing home the men, they won’t have to deal with the horrifying nipple pains that plagued their mothers so many years before.

nick says:

February 1, 2008 at 1:04 am

Totally agree
The key to satisfaction in bed
(or anywhere else) is giving first and then all else is so wonderful

Empty says:

February 1, 2008 at 6:45 pm

Believe it or not, some girls *like* having their nipples gnashed at or pulled on. It’s entirely possible that a guy that does something like that is demonstrating not a lack of clue but training to a different preference. He may assume he’s Doing It Right, and he may well have been- with his previous girlfriend or his high-school sweetheart.

The key to good sex is not in “giving first”, as the first commenter said, but rather two-way communication(both verbal and nonverbal) and a willingness to listen and learn.

chris says:

February 2, 2008 at 8:56 pm

I really dig the fact that most guys suck in bed. I consider myself to be mediocre but because I can last for an hour, I know where to touch, lick and suck and realize the importance of foreplay, teasing and light touch, women always tell me that I blow their minds.
I’m really not that good…I think it’s just that other guys are really bad typically.
OK, so maybe I am good. But I take pride in it, I want the woman to have a amazing time and FYI…satisfied customers are returning customers. I’ve never had a woman who wasn’t ready for round two, three or four after the fact.
So let’s not let other guys in on too many secrets. I kind of like the fact that most guys don’t know their way around a bedroom and don’t have the skills to make the woman feel like they’ve just been with a champ in the sack.

wad says:

February 3, 2008 at 3:57 pm

women just dont get it.. we dont care about being great in bed or even remotely good. as long as we get off thats all that matters. if were really into you then its a different story. but face it. majorityof you arnt .
thus we dont care.

AB says:

February 9, 2008 at 10:01 pm

Thanks for the advice, but how about loosing the attitude? Women can perform adequately in bed by doing almost anything to or with our penises. We have to understand complicated parts and learn each of your unique nuanced preferences. Most of us are more than happy to try to figure it, so cut us some slack.

you know who... says:

February 11, 2008 at 2:10 am

Fist off most women dont care about the mans point of view anyway. so y should we?

VickiL says:

February 17, 2008 at 9:29 pm

Totally agree!
My name is Lynn, a beautiful 40+ woman from US. Friends around me often call me milkwoman. I like this nickname. Online dating is not a bad way to meet new friends and more. I just want to find a mature gentleman for fun here… I also uploaded my hot photos taken on beach with my lovely bikini under the name milkwoman on
~~~~~MeetWealthyBoomer.com~~~~~~~~~..you may want to check them out.

Leopard14 says:

March 9, 2008 at 3:39 am

Have to agree with Nick and disagree with Empty. It’s all about your partner, take your time and enjoy the experience………don’t worry, it won’t take long and after you’ve driven her up to new heights, she will begging you to tell her what you want………..

Frank says:

April 18, 2008 at 4:38 pm

This explains a lot. I am no player by any means but the few women i have been with always told me how great i was, even the more ‘experienced’ ones i always thought they were just being kind, but after reading this i guess i just got it right from the get go.

Shouldnt everyone know by now warm them up gently – even if they like rough play start slow and build up, it makes it better for everyone involved, you silly lil kiddies.