Your Typical NJ Guido

Urban Dictionary definition of a “Guido”: An Italian American man usually residing in New York or New Jersey. He wears shirts that are too tight and unbuttoned 5 buttons too low to show off the chest that he spent hours and hours at the gym obtaining, he spends more time on his hair than his girlfriend, and continues to “hit the clubs” long into his mid to late 30’s. Often attracted to the female version of himself, the guidette.

Go down the Jersey Shore and in every direction you will see “Guidos” sexually harassing everything that moves. For those of you living in East Bumble-f*uck, PA who don’t know what a “Guido” looks like I’ve included a photo below that breaks down the style of your average NJ Guido.

guido tutorial

(Click to see full blown image) Image from photobucket user: chuckhenning

  • bored! says:

    so true Seaside is full of these guys

  • Capt Awesome says:

    This guy……… Long walk off a short cliff

  • jimmy says:

    guy is such a douche. id bet money that he takes it up the ass

  • Patrick says:

    East Bumblefuck PA? Ever heard of a place called Philly? Seriously, I hate guidos with the best of them, but Philly is awesome. We have an awesome Italian population with miraculously few guidos, and most of them are from NJ trying to ride the Philly scene. Our Italian population invented Cheesesteaks AND Hoagies (called such because they were invented on Hogeland Ave.) Guidos just invented meterosexuality and pioneered gayness to a new level.

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