F*uck! Cosmo Magazine is on to us!

Cosmo (aka the magazine of the devil) published a list giving women “8 hints that he is a bona fide player.” First off i’d like to take an issue up with Cosmo. Who says “player” anymore? That word is soooo 1998!

If you are fortunate enough to get a lot of ass then I am proud of you. Only problem is, statisticly about 73% of the hot women in America read Cosmo so if a few of your ‘tricks of the trade’ made the list its time to change your ‘player ‘ways or your ass well might dry up real soon!

1) He envied Alex from The Bachelor just a tad too much.

2) He has four toothbrushes in his bathroom, and all but one are pastel.

3) He explains that all girls in his vacation photos are friends.

4) He committed your number to memory without having to write it down.

5) Instead of sweets, his candy jar is filled with flavored condoms.

6) He can’t walk through a room full of women without lifting up his shirt and rubbing his abs.

7) There’s a lava lamp/camcorder/massage-oil collection by his bed.

His cell phone rings more times a night than a doctor’s does in a week.